Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our discussion forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
#2224534 03/04/09 03:14 PM
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
D
drgnfly Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
Skald and I are heading to Las Vegas and Arizona in a couple weeks. Yesterday we got some news:

Skald's friend from old job (where A started) calls and says "I hear you're going to Vegas and Arizona in a couple weeks." Skald is shocked at hearing this as he's kept quiet and hasn't told anybody, so he asks friend how he found out. The OW emailed friend and said that she's going to Vegas and AZ and thinks it's hilarious because sombody told her that Skald and I will be there at the same time. So we've been trying to figure out who's leaking this info.

I'm pretty certain I have it figured out. My physical therapist and I were talking about the trip because she and her H just went there. Come to find out through a little research, the physical therapist is related to OW! So guess who's telling about conversations she's having with her patients??

PT was doing really well on me, we got along really well, and then all of the sudden last week she tells me that she's ready to discharge me even though I'm still having problems. She had been taking care of Skald too (I went with) and she told him that he could do his stuff on his own and he was basically wasting her time. I couldn't figure out what was going on! Now I know.

I'm supposed to go back tomorrow, but I don't know if it's a good idea. Should I ignore this so OW doesn't know that her tactic to use friend worked? Should I confront PT about breach of confidentiality? Should I tell some lies to PT to see if any of those get back to us so we're positive she's the leak? (Not to mention, the right lies would infuriate OW)

btw....Skald made it clear to his friend that he doesn't want to hear ANY info about OW ever again and told him about the NC letter and how OW is trying to use him to get through.


BW-31
FWH-32(skald)
DD-5
In Recovery
"Do not go where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

"To Err is Human. To Arr is Pirate."
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
Report her to the state licensing board.

Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
Speak to her superior IMMEDIATELY.

If she loses her license or is disciplines in some way, chalk it up to the ongoing consequences of adultery.

And if the OW knows that using her friend worked for HER, all.the.better.

My guess is they won't be friends for long if the PT loses her job because of OW. Actually, it makes me Laugh. HOW STUPID of PT.

Understand that breach of confidentiality is of the UTMOST seriousness. Do NOT tell PT that you are telling her superior. Just do it.



WH2LE

BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
D
drgnfly Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
I don't have any proof that she talked to OW. It's just my word against theirs. smirk

They are related in some way. Cousins through marriage or sisters-in-law - I don't know.


BW-31
FWH-32(skald)
DD-5
In Recovery
"Do not go where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

"To Err is Human. To Arr is Pirate."
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 558
J
Member
Offline
Member
J
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 558
Originally Posted by drgnfly
I don't have any proof that she talked to OW. It's just my word against theirs. smirk

They are related in some way. Cousins through marriage or sisters-in-law - I don't know.

Regardless....you should still discuss your concerns with her superiors.

Take from someone in the medical field, due to HIPAA regulations and stiff fines for violaters, her superiors will want to know that there is even a small chance that one their employee's is sharing patient informations


Me46
FWH42
Married 19 yrs
EA 4/07 - 4/08
(Confirmed by polygraph that it had not gone PA)
Dday1 4/13/08
Dday2 8/8/08
S26
S16
D10
Trying to Recover
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 520
If there is EVEN an IMPLICATION that she may be involved, speak to her superior.

If she denies it and she HAS done it, you will at least have alerted her to the fact that in the future she needs to keep her mouth shut.

If she hasn't done it, I think you still need to chalk it up to the ongoing consequences of adultery. You may lose a PT and she may be reluctant to talk to her cheating, lying cousin/friend.

The coincidence is probably too strong to BE a coincidence.
We have JUST had this discussion at MY work about HOW SERIOUS it is to keep even the most incidental of conversations confidential.


WH2LE

BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
D
drgnfly Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
D
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 692
Thanks everyone!

Skald and I have decided that I will not go to my appointment tomorrow. I'm not going to call and cancel - she doesn't deserve that courtesy.

I'll have to figure out what to do about her talking, because she owns the place and is her own superior.

I am going to call my doc and ask for a referral to somewhere new and explain exactly why so maybe she can help point me in the right direction, and at least she might not suggest that place to other people looking for PT.



BW-31
FWH-32(skald)
DD-5
In Recovery
"Do not go where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

"To Err is Human. To Arr is Pirate."
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
medical providers are covered by state law. find the correct agency and report her. you do not need a smoking gun.

One she hid her conflict of interest by not divulging her relationship to the OW to you.


Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 107 guests, and 53 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
cbm800, Dodo M, Kingpin, MikaylaVaux, I.P.
71,728 Registered Users
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,546
Posts2,322,789
Members71,729
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2020, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.  |  Web Development by SunStar Media.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5