No. It's not.

And look at it this way, you have ALREADY lost her. So do what needs to be done. Expose the affair to everyone.

It DOES help. And you get support from places you would never expect.

Charlotte

Where should I expose too?

EVeryone!

Her work (she may be using company time to affair with. I mean if you had an affair you would try to use the work phone which your spouse couldn't keep up with), her family.

ANYONE who can influence her!

One woman's affair ended the second her parents were exposed to. They talked to her and BAM it was done.

Work, family, close friends...anyone who can be a positive influence for you.

You don't have to go as far as your mail carrier or your vet but you will sure want to once you get started. I almost did. Well, I did to the vet's assistant and she told the vet, but we know them well, LOL.

Charlotte

P.S.) Don't warn your WW that you are going to expose, either. This would give her an opportunity to paint you as looney tunes. That's what WS & OW did with OWH. But I got evidence that he couldn't deny so it was over for their lies.

When I told OMW, my WW texted me the next day and said that she thought she might love me again but she was wrong.

Here is what I have noticed:

Exposure makes them mad for a bit but then it's over.

The longer the A lasts, the truly madder they seem to get at you.


expose, expose, expose


Just tell her family what I told my WW family, you wanted them to know the truth so they could give good advice and guidance. Tell them you knew if they got bad information they would give bad advice.

You have to stop being Mr. Needy. She has cheated on you. Had sex with another man. You have tried to love her back. That never works while a spouse is in the fog. You have to pull away emotionally. You have to look after yourself. You have to regain your confidence. Right now she has zero respect for you. Why? Because after each time you took her back. You sent her the message that what she was doing was OK. Read the first part of your post. And how each subsequent betrayal, she was less and less convicted about. You convinced her that you wouldn't leave her when she cheats. How could she "not" continue cheating with a free pass. You should have kicked her a$$ out then. She should have had to work to earn your love and trust. But because you didn't require that of her. You convinced her that your love was not valuable enough. How could she think anything different? My advice is to start divorce proceedings. When she sees you starting them she will either balk at going through with it or she will want to go through with it. One or the other. But I will tell you that the way you are handling it now. She will eventually leave you. Because your love will be of no value. If you weren't willing to hold your love dear. Why would she?

The affair is now long distance.

It was physical for a time and now he's two hours away.

Why isn't there a sticky on Exposure to make this easier?

Just tell everybody about it. Pretty simple. Friends, family, yours, hers OM's.

She is also begging me to divorce her...to leave her.

That makes it your fault an not hers in her mind. My WW keeps telling me to go out with other women.

What do I do about that? She's been resolved to divorce me for a while...

She has been acting like I made her cheat.

She also claims that she feels trapped in our marriage...

I want her to stay but just can't seem to figure out how. Everyone tells me that this Exposure thing will just make it worse... I'm scared to try it.

If she wanted a D that bad, she would have filed already.

Actions speak louder than words.

Yeah? She's using real or imagine failings to justify her affair. This is how it works in these cases.

You just don't pay attention to it because you know better.

Charlotte

Who is everyone?

More from the WS Handbook.

Who the hell is EVERYONE? HER?

Exposure is like turning over a rock and letting the sunshine kill the mold growing beneath it--you shine this light into their affair to hasten its demise.

What the hell do you have to lose? YOU HAVE ALREADY LOST HER!!

If you want a snowball's chance in hell at changing that then you need to take action and stop whining about it!!!

So should I tell the ENTIRE family? Close, relatives, extended?

And go on facebook and post to all of them as well?