I am so very new to this forum and to be honest I can hardly believe it here I am posting. My story is this, I am married now almost 13 years to a man whom is about 12 yrs younger than myself. He pursued me and got me! We have always been a happy couple and as I thought just made for each other. We have had our ups and downs just like anyone else but we always talk about us being soul mates. He is always attentive and I never really needed to worry about us. Untill one late afternoon taking an ordinary trip on an ordinary day to the supermarket . There goes my cell phone ringing..oh dear its in my purse I'm driving and I cannot get it. So upon getting home. I pick up my phone to find a messege...hmmm seems they are talking in this messege and Im realizing its not for me , it is a miss call that was made by an open faced cell phone and I was listening to a conversation taking place by my H and a Co worker female. He was going on to her about a dream he had that morning and how it was sexually explicit. They were quite comfortable talking with each other and he didnt seem nervous at all. They had causal converstation then he kept going on about it telling her more and more. I was floored!! This is my H ?? I cant be!! He never even spoke with me about such things when we met! I didnt hear everything since the messege was cut off. I confronted him when he came home that night and he denied it at first ( typical). Then when I went into detail he went as white as a sheet and said he is ill. lol ...He's ill!! Quilty!!

I am just so upset about this because I have a million suspicions in my head..I am hurt ,,I am sad...I am everything. He denies having anything to do with this woman. Says he just blurted it out seeing her coming out of her office. Im just going back and forth if there is something more to this. I just cannot let this rest in my heart. We honestly do love each other but the person I heard on this day on the phone wasnt the man I thought I knew. Oh by the way she is also married with two children and supposdly is running around with someone else in the company. hmmmm or is it my husband??? I would surely appreciate an opinion . What is goin on here?

You suspect your WH is being dishonest, but you can say that you "honestly do love each other"?



1. Your WH is likely involved in an A of some sorts. Guys don't have those types of conversations with women unless they're quite close or intimately involved.

2. Has your WH admitted to the extent of his A yet?

3. Read up on Plan A and Exposure here. At the very least, the OWH needs to know what you know so far.

BTW - my FWW is M'd, we have 2 children, and that didn't stop her from running around with someone in her previous company.

PLan A and Exposure? I am very new to this site..I want to thank you also for your help and opinion..I am feeling very much all alone in this.

Hi,

I know it's shocking because when I read e-mails between my WH and the OW. . . I couldn't believe they were typed by his hand! Read the posting that is written about plan A and all the information with it. Truly dead on! When I first confronted my WS . . . he was crying and carrying on soooooo much that it was a dead give-away that it wasn't just flirting. He tried to pawn it off on the secretary of his boss. Just flirting. The truth is out there to be discovered but you probably need to set up some snooping as suggested in the "newbie" forum on this stuff. Brace yourself. It isn't pleasant when you start confirming your suspicions. What you know is bad . . . but what you probably don't know is worse!

Good Luck!

PV,

Welcome to MB.

It will be useful like the others have said to read and get a handle on what the plan is around here.
The two threads at the beginning of this forum, For Newly Betrayed Spouses and WATS Quick Start Guidelines will be helpful.

You also need to read the carrot and the stick thread which is also on this forum.
Study them all, keep your cool as best as possible, then come back and ask questions.

Sorry that you are here, your H does sound dishonest.
Oh, and yes, start snooping. Look up cell phone bills and check #'s, credit card statements, H's vehicle, search anywhere for anything out of the ordinary.

Take care.