You are right on the money again, SDGuy.

Yep, I picked the fight. I talked finances knowing it would anger WH. But I also wanted to let him know what he's up against when the D progresses. So maybe I just wanted to warn him that I'm not going to be "friends" during this mess. That I've got a L ready to go. That I know what he's been up to. That he's already fu#%ed me over with the A, but he's not going to fu#% me over with the D. (Yep, I said this.)

OK -- as for me -- and what I should do to keep busy.

Let me say this. Since WH left I've...gone back to work part-time. I've planned a trip over Easter vacation with the kids. I've gone out to dinner a few times. I've taken the girls to a Melodrama. I've tackled the banana trees in the back yard. I've attended DD15's first high school swim meet. I've taken the kids to the Dr., dentist, eye doctor. I've smiled happily in photos with the kids all dressed up for their high school formal. I've gone to the beach for the day by myself. I've driven to L.A. for only the third time in my life to shop for formal dresses with the girls. I've attended a wedding and reception AND had a good time smoking a cigar with the guys. I've had the fence repaired. I've watched a few videos. I've bought a pair of really high heels. I've filled out college financial aid forms. I've opened up a checking account in my own name. I've had a manicure. I've had botox (shhhhhhhh). I've started going to church an extra time during lent. I've survived a staph infection (ouch!!). I've attended two birthday parties. I've learned about FaceBook. I've gone into the bank with only a statement and walked out with a $12k cashier's check. I've made new MB friends and are meeting two of them this weekend. I've taken down my wedding photo.

These may not sound like accomplishments, but they are to me. Much better than laying around the house all day crying for WH which I did during the first few months after discovery.

I know, I know...stay dark. But, in fairness, I feel better today that I stood up to WH yesterday. He's in denial. He's wayward. He's not H. I get that...and I deserved feeling bad yesterday because I purposely caused the confrontation.

But reality, folks, is that WH will need to step up to the plate during D and disclose financial stuff. I've held back about this for long enough. Even L said I should let him know that sooner or later he'll need to disclose. There's no hiding the money trail.

So I may have drained my LB...but I did hear him call me "honey" once. That'll do for now.

Back to dark. Put a piece of tape over my mouth and hide the phones.

So off the forum (goodnight folks), pop open a cold Coors Light, put on my jammies, make some Orval Reddenbacher popcorn, lie on the couch under a blanket, and try to figure out what the hel! is happening on Lost. I'm Lost this season....

(OK..I lied...I'll check back a few times before shutting down my computer for the night....in case anyone posts back....)

Hey HH, I am lost with lost. Even with the captions at the bottom of each scene. Also lost about H.

So I screwed up too. I will be posting on my sitch. It is a full moon, gets me every time. I do know H is scared he will lose everything financially but still deep in with OW. Doesn't care about daughters (not enough to do something about it), just himself.

Time to pick ourselves up and get moving. This stuff is not for sissies. Glad you feel better today.

If anyone sees a picture of HH, she looks like she is 15! no kidding. I hate you It must be the state air!

Looking forward to meeting up on Sunday. Wish I could get packing. I will be running around last minute as always!

I'm looking forward to meeting you to, friend. And thanks for the compliment! You're the second person TODAY to say that I look young. The other was our pediatrician. I took DD16 for an appointment this afternoon, and kind, kind Dr. said I looked younger than ever. This from a man I've taken the kids to for over 17 years and doesn't know a thing about the A or the D.

So...maybe the weight loss and trendy clothes are paying off. And...next week at eye Dr. appt., I'd like to get some contacts...

Oh -- wow -- I am working on myself AND getting a life.

Yeah...HH...You're finally getting it....

Maybe we will look so good our H's will not recognize us and just try to pick us up because we are sooo good looking

This afternoon, my DD and I enjoyed lunch and retail therapy with Trying2Live and Hope and Hope's DD. Wow -- what beautiful, caring, strong and wonderful women!!

How unfortunate that betrayal and selfishness and waywardness brought us together. But we are now bonded blood sisters because of our circumstances.

It's interesting comparing notes...many similarities but also many differences. Any way you look at it, we did not deserve our Ms to be broken up, our families to be destroyed, and our self-esteem to be trampled on.

How wonderful it would have been to have met these women under other circumstances with joy in our hearts and with our H's by our side.

But we will survive...we have to...for ourselves and for our kids. And, unfortunately, our WHs know this and are counting on this. They know us better than anyone else. They know we will keep our families going while they indulge in their fantasies.

We all agree that our WHs will crash and burn eventually. Each will fall due to their own arrogance and greed -- whether money or alcohol or alienation of their children.

And it will likely be too late for reconcillation. We beautiful women will have picked ourselves up off the floor, put on our big girl thongs (no panties for us!), found our lost self-respect and self-esteem, and said "no more" to crumbs.

We will find our mojo again...we will move on...we will survive despite the shattered dreams caused by the A.

I am green with envy!

Not really, I'm so happy that you guys got together. That's perfect! Isn't it amazing who God puts in our lives when we think no one is there?

Hugs to all of you ladies! Wish I was there...

HH Well here I am on T2L computer checking in.
It was a joy to meet you today. Out of sadness and sorrow today, came laughter and strength. It was a wonderful experience to meet f2f and exchange stories, hugs, and good will. Even though our kids were worried that Moms were meeting Internet people in person. (Guess we taught them right to be cautious!) The kids are relieved that we no one was drugged, kidnapped and we even managed to take a few photos!

Also met last night with SIHW and her cousin and had a great bonding night. Need to ask about that mechanical bull.

As far as PM, T2L said don't be green with envy there is no stopping any of us from getting together.

Hey y'all we need to have a Texas meeting. There are quite a few of us PrincessMeg, Catperson, Dealan to mention a few. Lets start new topics by state! Should be interesting.

This infidelity is a cancer that has spread across the land. It is great that we are starting to unite.

HH, I know we will meet again. You are a strong, sassy, and yes very sexy (under those too large clothes!). We are goddesses.

Hope, heck yeah! I've got plenty of room at my house, if you want to come to Houston!

I am really getting onboard with this MB bonding. It has been so sad at my house that this has been like a breath of fresh air!

Looking forward to a Texas group.

Sorry I didn't make it yesterday HH. I had the loooooonnng drive home with a little furry surprise riding shotgun.

I picked up my new kitten from the breeder while I was in L.A. Needless to say everyone was surprised and loves her even my older cat who held her down to groom her despite her objections...she would have made a great mom.

But ya'll (my best southern drawl how'd I do hope?) arn't too far away there will be more fun times to come.

I feel blessed to have such supportive friends and family in my life. I'm reminded that when God is on your side, who can be against you? And I feel that my life is BLESSED. Crazy since the D has begun. Crazy because the financial stuff is out of control. Crazy since WH has been gone almost 3 months and hasn't seen the kids (except DD15 on 2 occasions).

So...maybe I'm finally getting the benefit of Plan B. Stay away from the drama and live.

Hi HH {{{{hugs}}}}} looks like our little emos disappeared along with this board and I can't put all my little icons in!

We are blessed and never felt it more than this week. Meeting, bonding, laughing and crying with people that truly understand.

How do you feel about Monday and D inviting WH to confirmation? Should be interesting. I know you will look like a Goddess in those high heels.

I am home and wondering where the week went! take care.

Glad you made it back safe and sound. Too bad the pool boy didn't fit into your suitcase....or did he?

As for Monday -- WH called today regarding a money issue and mentioned wanting to attend if I didn't have a problem with it. I said no problem with me. After thinking more on it...and after getting upset because of the call (that's why I need to stay in Plan B, folks -- to avoid the drama of hearing his voice and his TONE), I texted him the following "Do not sit near me at Confirmation."

I know I need to work on boundaries and the "do not sit" boundary will be good practice.

Still on CA time!
Good for you. And I assume his parents will be sitting with you also. Maybe there can be a special pew for waywards! How does D feel that he is coming?

Look like a Goddess. Seeing the competition -- there is no competition. You are beautiful and wonderful and he is blind with this addiction right now.

Still on CA time!
Good for you. And I assume his parents will be sitting with you also. Maybe there can be a special pew for waywards! How does D feel that he is coming?

Look like a Goddess. Seeing the competition -- there is no competition. You are beautiful and wonderful and he is blind with this addiction right now.

OK -- I tried to edit and it won't let me.

I need to explain. I posted earlier that I feel blessed and I realize how much good I'm getting from Plan B. Then I posted that I had talked with WH today and the conversation upset me.

All true. But the "upset" only lasted a little while then turned into "anger." Anger because a simple money request escalated into a full-blown conversation.

Me and my boundaries. I really need to work on these to prevent ANY conversations with WH.

My guess is DD expected him to decline.

And yes, I will be sitting with his parents. And it should be plenty awkward for WH. All eyes should be on him -- the adulterer -- at Mass -- not sitting with his family.

And the sermon will likely focus on the young adults -- how they need to avoid the devil's temptations in today's world. All applicable to WH -- what he NEEDS to hear. Wow -- another intervention by an awesome GOD. I'm still feeling blessed. I'll pray that WH attends and that the WORD reaches him!

Yep, I will look good. DD's dress is way too short afterall, so we'll need to look for another one -- darn it -- an excuse to pick out a drop dead one for me as well.

There will be TWO goddesses on Monday.

Maybe you could wear DD's dress and have it be "way to short"...lol

Hummm....that's a thought. HH in skin tight mini-dress at Mass surrounded by WH's family while WH sits alone in the balcony. Hummmmm........

We'd be quite the scandal....Wait....we already ARE quite the scandal.....

I swear -- just about everybody in town knows. Helps that I have such a huge family with lots and lots of relatives and friends. I think that's why WH goes out of town so often so he doesn't run into somebody we know.

His best bet will be to move out of town after the D. He will never be welcomed in our circle of family and friends. We're not that kind of people.

Poor WH will only have OW and her brats and his debts. This story line would be almost comical if I weren't one of the main characters.

Just checking in. FIL invited us all over for dinner tonight. Again, I'm soooooo blessed to have all of WH's family supporting me and the kids.

And it's not like a contest. We're just on the God-side and WH and Bimbo are on the devil-side. Black and white. How hard is that?

FIL said he feels like busting WH in the chops. He can't stand seeing my kids abandoned by their dad.

I feel the same way.

Saw a book at Target today called something like "Why a Son Needs a Dad." Made me cry. It has pictures and phrases. All things that WH STOPPED doing for our son and daughters when the A began.

How can a dad do this? How can he go from a great dad to no dad? It just kiils me that the kids lost someone they loved so much. And it's not like he's dead, he just has more fun living with Bimbo and her brats then living here with us and being a part of his REAL family.

It sucks.