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fWxW treats me like I'm the WS. Says I ran off and left her n kids. She says I abandoned them and running around w/ a bunch of loose women. I can't believe I'm getting the guilt trip for going plan D. I thought when you enter an A, you are most likely saying, I willing to get D, this relationship means that much to me. You know its the most probable outcome, yet WS are shocked when they get served. Then to try and guilt trip the BS for leaving, is just plain crazy. Anyone else in the sit? DUDE

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What does "freed" mean? Divorced?

Last edited by Pepperband; 04/10/09 10:30 AM.
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Not in that situation but some WSs just don't think the BS will actually up and leave. Why they are surprised or mad upon this revelation must be attributed to the self-centered thinking and stupidity that's at work in their brains.


BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Tell her she abandoned the marriage by allowing another mans member inside her. Tell her you are just giving her what she wanted the freedom and ability to get horizontal with any man she wants.

Then tell her that she apparently didn't desire the love and cherishing you gave her and will one day you will find a non skank to shower your love upon.

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Originally Posted by Pepperband
What does "freed" mean? Divorced?

FREE FROM THE BALL AND CHAIN..Yes DIVORCED!

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Sounds to me like you might still have an emotional investment and you still care about what she thinks & says ... ?

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You might be divorced, but you are not (yet) emotionally free from that relationship.

How is your grieving process going?

This divorce is a major loss. How are you dealing with that?

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Originally Posted by ouchthathurt
Tell her she abandoned the marriage by allowing another mans member inside her. Tell her you are just giving her what she wanted the freedom and ability to get horizontal with any man she wants.

Then tell her that she apparently didn't desire the love and cherishing you gave her and will one day you will find a non skank to shower your love upon.

Thats actually the ironic part. I've been gone a long time and she pursues NO RELATIONSHIP, yet she is FREE AS A BIRD NOW. I've, well, lets just say partied like a Rock Star. She hates that I've been w/ the ladies while she sits at home for months on end. Its been one big bonus for me, but I'm growing tired of the night life...DUDE

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Quote
I've, well, lets just say partied like a Rock Star.

And what has that taught you about yourself?
You're hot?
You're cool?
You rock?

Slow down and process your loss. Stop running so fast.

What lessons (about yourself) are you supposed to be learning as you grieve?



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Originally Posted by Pepperband
You might be divorced, but you are not (yet) emotionally free from that relationship.

How is your grieving process going?

This divorce is a major loss. How are you dealing with that?

IT HURTS...I'm pretty tough emotionally, but it darn sure hurts..DUDE

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What is your age?

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Sounds like a lonely existence, Dude. I understand the urge to party etc. In the long run, not good, thoguh.
Anyway, your WS just does not understand the natural consequences of an affair. She . like many WSs , only sees how things affect her. So, she views your actions as wrong.
She is clearly screwed up. So, don't worry abour her perspective.
My XW did this as well, painting herself as the victim of abandonment. These folks are really nuts and can convince themselves of anything. They love to play victim.

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Dude,


Have you found your self-esteem in the panties of all those other women?

Has partying like a rock star healed your wounds?

Have you forgotten the pain by cruising the bars?


The answer is no, isn't it.

Now that you are falling back to earth, the reason you still care about your ex-wife's opinion is..............


wait for it..................




SB


Lucky to be where I am, in a safe place to get marriage-related support.
Recovered.
Happy.
Most recent D-day Fall 2005
Our new marriage began that day. Not easily, but it did happen.
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Well now that she knows that you can party like a rock star, maybe you want to try again? Now she knows that if she strays, you can out do her by a mile. And that you won't be lonely, she will.

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.... drum roll ....

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Originally Posted by Pepperband
What is your age?

39 and holding...Really 39!

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Pep, I said wait for it. Sheesh.


Dude,

Why do you care?


Lucky to be where I am, in a safe place to get marriage-related support.
Recovered.
Happy.
Most recent D-day Fall 2005
Our new marriage began that day. Not easily, but it did happen.
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.... drum roll ....

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maybe he can't think because of all the drumming, pep!


Lucky to be where I am, in a safe place to get marriage-related support.
Recovered.
Happy.
Most recent D-day Fall 2005
Our new marriage began that day. Not easily, but it did happen.
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I care because I still love the Sheet and care what she thinks/feels.

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