i havent been on this website in 2 years. long story short my husband had affair 3 years ago. he lives with this woman who is married as well. we are not divorced because of financial reasons. i assumed the bills and the house. our daughter is now 18 and she will be graduating next month.
i have not dated or seen anyone since this happened. i firmly believe that i shouldnt do this since i am still married. to tell you the truth for some stupid reason i still have feelings for this man. why i dont know. i have been asked out by really nice guys but i feel so guilty that i cant do it. i feel i am cheating even though we havent been together in 3 years. my emotions are all over the place. i am depressed one minute and the next i am putting a fake smile on my face to show my family and friends. to make matters worst i was talking to him and we was talking about graduation. i finished the conversation and he ended with i love you! i pretended like i didnt hear it. the next day he called because he had the money for his part of things and ask me did i hear what he said. i acted like i still didnt know what he was talking about. he said i told you yesterday that i love you and you didnt respond. i said how am i suppose to respond you still live with her and going home to her. those words dont mean anything. he said whether you believe it or not i do and i know i have done you so wrong. trust me when i say i want to make it right. he said he dont know why still goes home to her. i said well until you figure it out we have nothing to talk about when it comes to this.

i have just felt so awful. i feel like i have been on a roller coaster ride. i know i did the right thing but why am i sitting her crying over it? i just need some advice on how to approach this... please help!

You shouldn't be in contact with him. You should be in Plan B. The only communication he should have from you is a Plan B letter that specifies you will not communicate with him until he permanently separates from his AP. Actions speak louder than words. And as you already know, his words mean nothing.

Yah, I'm in a similar boat. We're divorced, but a little over a year later, I still feel married to him and can't bring myself to be romantic with anyone else regardless of what ex is doing. He didn't cheat but God only knows what he's been doing this last year-I don't ask.

We have two little girls.

And I just don't know. I still have feelings for him and he does for me too...I just don't know.

But good luck. Sorry I can't help. Can only relate.