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Joined: May 2008
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Originally Posted by Heartpain
Originally Posted by Dude007
And you all blast me??! That guy is WASTED and a total train wreck....If you go after someone, do it legally..It feels much better than being brought up on assault charges..DUDE
Honestly can't say you haven't deserved the occasional 'blast', but welcome to the MB "multiple standards", where whether or not you 'like' someone or how much you like/dislike them is a direct indicator to how you will be seen/reacted to.

Objectivity goes out the window.

ITA

Just make sure if you go against MB doctrine you sugarcoat it with some teenage humor and you'll be ok.

iam #2251281 04/25/09 06:32 AM
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Can't we all just fight about something like spandex ('eh, Iam) and all get along?

What Mike wanted was advice and to vent-- the BEST thing about the MB website.

The worst thing Mike did was to take the venting/obsession with the OM way too far and, apparently, smothe the guy.

If we as a collective group did anything to encourage this tsunami, (yeah, I know Mike did his own action-- not us)
I mean, even tho he is funny as heck, -- we should have not tee hee'd the projected violence.

NOW there were quite a few posters ,pep and other I remember, who pointed this out at the time.

Maybe we as a community should -- well I guess I can't say.
What does the H's think about ranting/obsessing against OM, OW or spouse of OM,OW?

I don't remember anything specific.

good day all,
Mike I hope this is you, I hope you are O.K.







Me; W 46
Him; H 46

2 girls
DD19
DD16
Dated/Married total 28 years.
..I am learning and working on myself.
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What Mike did wrong was to abuse the OMW or did we all forget that?

Or maybe it was OK because he told a good joke?

iam #2251295 04/25/09 07:59 AM
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The reality here is that Mike loves his wife, doesn't want to lose her and is going to do anything to keep her.

GG


D-Day #1 Aug/2007.
D-Day #2 1/27/12
Legally Separated
iam #2251296 04/25/09 08:07 AM
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I didn't forget!

He has a wayward entitled attitude, and I told him as much on the thread that disappeared. Doesn't care who he hurts as long as he gets even.

I still think he has been a WH at some point! Either an EA or a PA? Has too much of the wayward personality that stands out to me.





Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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I've read Mike's posts for a long, long, time. He gives the impression of being a "Slapnuts"(an old poster) with a sharp wit and sense of humor.

What appears to have happened was, by analogy, he purchased a Lamborghini when he was young. It was a sexy and exciting car and served its purpose, which was to impress all those around him as to how smart, exciting and sexy *he* was.

Now he's older and some of his interests have changed, so he's been trying to figure out how to change the Lamborghini into a Jeep CJ-7 when it suits his purposes.

Bottom line is, he got what he got when he bought the Lamborghini and if his primary interest is now "off-roading" he needs to trade for a Jeep or just accept the fact his sports car won't be doing Moab.

He doesn't want to sell or trade the Lamborghini because he can't stand the idea of anyone else driving it. He also despises the car because it won't do what he wants.

In plain terms, he married for one set of reasons with a given set of requirements in potential "Mrs. Mikes". Over the years, his requirements have changed and he has spent hours with MB and other resources trying to *change* his wife into what he now wants her to be. His implementation of MB principles appears to have been a method not to change himself, but to change his wife, ONLY.

Women who do this to men aren't sympathized with. Why the double standard?

As a FBH, I would say that though he bears absolutely no blame for his wife's choosing to be unfaithful, he is as responsible as anyone I've seen for creating an environment conducive to the development of an affair.


Last edited by Heartpain; 04/25/09 08:29 AM.

"If you put away those who report accurately, you'll keep only those who know what you want to hear. I can think of nothing more poisonous than to rot in the stink of your own reflections." (The Lady Jessica to her daughter Alia, in Frank Herbert's Children of Dune)
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Well said HP!





Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.
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Great analogy HP.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Let's get back to marriage building, please.


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