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withdrawal stage?
#2254621 05/01/09 10:20 AM
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mrsmixedup Offline OP
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mrsmixedup
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My husband has been causiously affectionate with me since we've been trying to work on things (his affair exposed in Mar.) He revealed it was a several yr. affair. Should I expose that he may be in the withdrawal stage, so he can confirm and I can back off a while?? thoughts?? I do believe he's stopped, says he has, I've been amazingly (if I can say) gracious and providing an environment of openness. He doesn't like to talk much about it (no surprise) but also says he's detached from me, kinda hanging here.
Re: withdrawal stage?
mrsmixedup #2254674 05/01/09 11:03 AM
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MrWondering Offline
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He "says he has" stopped.

You'd be a fool to believe him. Quiting a "several year affair" won't be easy and you need to confirm for yourself the facts, independent of what he tells you. He's a KNOWN liar. Trust is rebuilt and NOT to be freely given.

Does he still see the OW? At work or otherwise? Has he given you access to everything...his computer, his cell phone? Has he changed his phone numbers?

Most importantly...if the OW is/was married during the course of the 2 year affair...does her husband know about the affair? If not, then without forewarning your husband...you MUST expose them.

Mr. Wondering

FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
Re: withdrawal stage?
MrWondering #2254677 05/01/09 11:05 AM
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MrWondering Offline
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Forgot to mention...

Have you both been checked out for STD's ...PRIOR to reengaging in sexual contact. At least a condom would help until tests results are obtained. I know it's embarassing; but could be life threatening. Even HPV kills women everyday.

Mr. Wondering

FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
Re: withdrawal stage?
mrsmixedup #2254797 05/01/09 01:46 PM
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wannamoveforward Offline
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Quote
My husband has been causiously affectionate with me since we've been trying to work on things (his affair exposed in Mar.)


Exposed to whoom? How ?

Quote
I do believe he's stopped, says he has

How do you know that it has stopped , other than him saying so?

Quote
Should I expose that he may be in the withdrawal stage, so he can confirm and I can back off a while??


Who do you want to expose that he is in withdrawl and what do you hope that will achieve ?




FBW(me)- 45
FWH- 53
D-day 4/29/08
Moving forward pursuing happiness & a loving Marriage with DH.

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