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Joined: Jan 2008
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I am not sure if this is the right forum to put this topic, but I know it has the largest readership on MB so I will start here.

One of my best friends has a son, 24, who lives in Idaho. His wife, 21(?) of 3 years has just left him. He realizes now that she has been cheating(supposedly she is not right now. Yeah, right). They have one daughter who just turned 2.

He is desperate at this point, not to save his marriage, but to get custody of the daughter. The situation as it stands is horrific.

The mother does not have a stable place to live. She is sleeping on friend's couches till she can get an apartment. Which of course means the baby is also. Personally, I believe that she is waiting till her affair partner is either available or until she finds a new man to move in with....or something. She only works part-time.

My friend's son works nights in the social work system. He is in the process of getting his master's degree in social work and his been in this position for 3 years. His wife keeps the baby at night and drops her off to him when he gets home from work in the morning. So he really does not sleep because he has the baby.

So far he has not done anything legal but realizes that he needs to. If he lived in my state I would be able to tell him what the law says regarding these things and what agency to send him to, but I don't know about Idaho.

Of course, I see all the things that made the situation ripe for an affair, but at this moment, his most urgent need is a way to make life stable for his daughter and get custody.

There are many other factors at play here. The mother's mental stability is one of them, but for the sake of expediency, I won't go into all of it.

He has the possibility of working days, but it will come with a pay cut. And then he will have to pay for day care. His mother(my friend) has urged him to talk to his boss immediately. He, of course, does not want to because he thinks it makes him look bad(typical BS).

Can anyone who lives in Idaho give advice as to where he should start(besides with his boss) in the effort to get custody? He is in Couer d'Alene. He has only lived in Idaho a short time. Lived in Spokane before this. They moved closer for his job. He knows virtually no one where he is living now.

We are urging him to post here.

I realize that this is all vague, but I just want to start the ball rolling for him. He is in such shock that he is having a difficult time figuring out what his next step should be.

Any help at all would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.


WH2LE

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wh2le,

My Father lives in ID and is a retired atty, but he is all the way down in Teton Valley nr WY.

I would be glad to ask him but i doubt he knows anyone in the area up there.

Is there a legal aid group where he is? Lawyers that do pro bono work for credit with the bar?

SWW

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Right now, FS24(friend's son 24) doesn't seem to know anything about his legal alternatives.

If your dad can give any advice at all, it would be more than he has now.

Actually, I hope his boss can steer him in the right direction. After all, they work in the social work field.

I will pass on your questions to FS24. Good ideas.

Ah, the Teton Valley. The best vacation I ever had was to Yellowstone. We traveled to Jackson Hole and I can still see the mighty Tetons in my mind's eye.

Thanks for the quick response SWW.


WH2LE

BS(Me)-57
FWH-54
Married-5/26/2001(2nd for me, 1st for him)
DS-30
DD-27
D-Day-05/31/2007
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no problem, i'll ask him when i call him tonite.

Yes the Tetons are amazing. My mom and dad went on a trip there about 12-14 years ago and called my sister and me and told us they were staying and buying a house.

We were like...???????

They said it was "magic" and there was no way to describe it, you had to come experience it for yourself. They ended up buying a ranch and building their dream home and I have to say, it is the most magical place on earth.

to all of you who haven't been, don't go, it's awful, you won't like it... smile

I'll let you know what the old man says.

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The only thing I know about Idaho is that they have the fastest divorce in the US. We had an MB'r up there - Brett - whose wife filed for divorce and they were divorced very, very quickly - as I recall, around 6 weeks. Hopefully it takes more time if a child is involved.

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Hey working,

Talked to my dad. He is going to go into town in the AM to talk to a practicing lawyer friend that does a lot of family law. I asked him about Legal Aid and he said in lot of small towns there's just not a lot of pro-bono work done.

He is gonna call or email me in the morning after he talks to his friend.

SWW


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