It sure has been a while since I was here. Its so sad to see so many people going through this still.

For those who don't know my story it was a long and sad tale. In a nutshell married 26 years, Exwh moved out to live with OW strung me along for about a year with false promises. Divorce finally happened he now has married her and oppssss he found out the grass is't green anymore. She is controlling and pretty much has kept him from the kids and his own family. At least from what I have been told by DS they threaten each other with divorce about once a week...

Anyway enough about the waywards, on to me... I have a new love in my life and we are very happy. We got married on Jan.1 and life is so much calmer. I could not have asked for a better man. He treats me like a queen. Its really strange to be in a relationship with no screaming and name calling. Somedays I really wonder why I put up with the ex like i did. The kids and grandkids like him alot. In fact the grandkids call him papa and have a good relationship. They know him more than they do their real papa.

I hope this lets all of you know that good things can come out of bad. I pray for those of you who want to save your marriages that it will happen. But remember if it doesn't you can and will be happy again. If you want to read my story its on here somewhere Hurtinginokla was my name then.

The advice from some long time posters like Melodylane, Pepperband and a few others is wise stuff. I know the plans are hard to do sometimes, planb was the hardest thing for me but do follow them. It can keep you sane.

My prayers to all of you .....

Good to hear from you Hurting!!!

I remember your story. I am glad to hear you have come through to the other side!

Grace does show in the end, doesn't it?

Walking its good to see a name I remember ....

Your right grace does show in the end....

Life is wonderful.......

Great to hear from you and that life is good. I'm so happy for you!

So nice to hear a happy ending. Not always the ending you thought it would be, but better than you could have imagined!!!!!

Hey hurtin'! Thank you so much for the update. I wonder about you often and am sooooooooo happy your Ex got what he dished out! I am even happier to hear how well you are doing and that your new man is a keeper.

My dear, dear friend, Hurtininokla!! What a happy ending for you! I will never forget the hell you went through. Thank for the happy update.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{happyinokla}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Hello, Aren't you the lady who had the crape myrtle trees in your yard? Whenever I see one I think of the posts about how the trees symbolized each member of your family, and how upset the ex was when the new property owner cut them down. Is that you?

Anyway, I am happy for you about a new and better life and wondered what ever happened to you.

Congratulations on coming out of that dark tunnel.

So glad to see your update hurting/happy!

It was a great boost to my blucky day. Thanks so much for sharing with us.

Hi Okla! Glad to hear your happy ending, and thanks for stopping by to share it.

So glad to hear you are doing so well!

You really do deserve it, God has truly blessed you, and I am especially glad to hear your children and grandchildren are doing well.

Blessings for your new marriage!

Love in Christ,
Miss M

I was wondering about you just the other day! I'm so glad to hear that you are happy and doing well with a wonderful new hubby!

Do you reckon your XWH ever thinks about those "letters" he and OW got?

Wonderful news! You've been on my mind a lot. Long ways away from a house with no heat in the winter of that last year of being attached to the man being drug under the wheels of the Karma Bus he gassed up years ago!

Hey C...thanks for the update. Glad things are well.

Quite the success story.

Mr. Wondering

wow look at all of you wonderful people still here....

I truly think of all of you often. I had been off line for almost 2 years since the pc crashed I finally got it fixed.

Yes Bell the trees were mine and he sure was mad about that. I had forgotten that story lol

Yes one thing is for sure Karma can be a B....! you lay down with dogs you get flea bitten .....

The one biggest thing i learned from going through hell and back is, There is truly a rainbow at the end if you allow it to happen.. So don't ever give up on yourself and make life the best it can possibly with or without your wayward spouse...

You know - your story, along with Believer and others here who's wayward husbands decide to abandon and abuse their families is a warning and comfort.

The warning is this: when a man degrades himself with an OW, and decides to stay degraded, when he finally does break free of the OW, she never leaves him as good as the man she stole from someone else. And he was never as good a man at any moment with her than he was with the wife he first took vows with.

Recovery for this man is nearly impossible. I've never seen it happen on this board or in life. The qualities that would make that kind of "soul" recovery don't exist, or they would have turned from waywardness long before the destruction of their family was complete.

**edit to add the one exception that seems to be blooming on the horizon - Queenie's story has taken on an unexpected evolution and her husband may just have what it takes - but it's still a work in process and the hard work has just begun... end of edit ****

The comfort is that you got the best he was while he was. Grieve the loss, move on and live the best life you can. There is someone out there (even if it is just yourself) who appreciates you and celebrates that you are you!

Congrats Happy!

Hey Happy! Good to see you again.

Hey Big sure is good to hear from you ..... Its good to see things are good for you as well.....

Just want to say you were like a big brother to me and really helped me alot..... Between you and Mel and Mimi and so many others you all helped me keep my sanity .......

My love to all of you ..... C

Okla, good, I thought that was you! How wonderful that you found a man to treat you like you deserve. You fought and fought to save your marriage and your family, I remember your story.
You are the winner in this.

Hi Hurtin or should I say Happy,

Odd how that Karma cement truck just keeps rolling isn't it?

It was good to hear that your life has turned around and become a success story. I suspect your children are very happy for you and your new H.

Hope you stick around and help a few folks out. There seems to be plent here all of the time.

God Bless,

JL