I'm new to these forums. Based on what I've seen, I'm probably about to draw some significant fire, but it's desperation time.

I am the WH in a 9 year marriage. Affair began last April. I won't go into details, save to say that I've recently undergone a major change, now understand the hurt and sufferring I have caused, and have ended the affair. Thus far I've been successful at breaking off all contact, though at times this is very hard.

My lovely betrayed wife filed for divorce several months ago, and things are progressing. At this point, she has exhausted her desire to return to the marriage, since it took me too long to come around. It seems just that I should suffer the loss of her, and for most purposes my daughter who I love more than all other things in creation, in payment for what I've done. It would seem my wife no longer has any love left for me.

We are now apart (different states) most of the time, and my work prevents me from keeping my daughter close. I miss them both terribly.

At this point, I'm not sure what to do to win her back. I had a trip planned with the OP - cancelled it and got tickets for wife and girl to go instead. Not interested. She'll barely talk to me on the phone. Have things looked so bleak for anyone else, yet turned out well in the end? I'm just hoping for some encourage to remain strong in my resolve. Thanks in advance.

Finally sane,
I'm a BS. You are correct it looks bleak - your W has filed for D, moved to another state and wants nothing to do with you. Once a woman emotionally detaches from a husband it is very likely she will not return to you. Your best bet is to have a phone consult with Dr. Harley - he is an expert at infidelity and saving marriages.

Here's the fire - you choose the behavior you choose the consequence.

Gg