Today must be my day for griping: Well, my MIL's family is having a family reunion some (12 hours away). My H and I have planned on going for over a month now. Now that he has been dealing with OW and OC for the last 1 1/2 weeks - NOW he tells me that he's not sure we can go - 'cause he's got too much work to do and he HAS to get it finished before we can leave, ya da ya da ya da. He does this to me every time I have vacation days off from work. He is "at this moment" taking OC 30 miles to his Mom's to keep for OW (so she can work). Ugh - then he uses his LoveBusting (as usual) and says "well, since this is a problem to you, why don't you just hop in the car and drive yourself out there and I'll catch up with you when I can!" I said "fine". And he hung up. What more do I have to deal with? Is it so freaking much for me to ask for a long weekend without OW and OC around and a time to relax with my H and my D? How selfish can someone be? Please help I'm really having a bad day.<P>------------------<BR>

Insensitive, is what he is being. Definitely.<P>Don't lovebust! Do NOT lovebust! <P>Ask him what he wants YOU to do during that time. Maybe you can wait until he is free to accompany you - or just cancel the whole thing - and send D with MIL? <P>I know you don't want him to stay behind, where he has a temptation to be with OW. You've gone this far, just hang in there a bit longer.

Maybe its time for a little "turnaround" with your attitude that might surprise them both (husband and OW). Maybe you can start infringing on HER time and calling her and telling her that you and H want to see his child and want to make child part of YOUR family ... I could see her instantly becoming threatened by you getting close to the baby, etc. Maybe you should tell husband to call OW and ask if you and he can pick up baby and keep it for say a week or so, that you want to let the child be a part of your family. She's using the child against you and you need to find a way to turn it into a positive for you. Husband may also start siding with you if you show interest in his other child in a positive way! Just a thought.

Daycare<BR> I have no advice for you on this one. No wonder you're angry!! <BR>This OW is taking too much control. I agree that it is time for you to step forward. Not sure how you can do it but I think the trick is to show that you are more mature. Stay calm. Treat this OW like the child she is. Even if you don't feel like you are in control start acting like you are. Let her and H know that you will not be easily dismissed. I think it's time to sit h down and tell him you aren't comfortable with this separate relationship. She can't call all the shots. That is what she's trying to do.<BR>Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you.

Thanks Wasstubborn. I was wondering where you were! I've missed you. I'm hanging on by my fingernails today - not a good day - lots of issues I feel like I'm not getting "resolved". OH well - I guess I'll have to keep on keeping on. Thanks and glad you're back.