Not much of a victory. We were in front of the judge for about 3 minutes. Basically, our attorneys agreed that D!ck pays the back support amount due and that he'll cover two of the items he had been deducting. Not even a slap on the wrist since it seemed to just be a clarification. So, in essence, I get no additional money but he has to pay two things he didn't think he had to. And he was reminded to get us the credit card statements -- either the easy way or the hard way.

But what about the rest? The run away debt. Buying Bimbo Tiffany jewelry while we were married... and all the other stuff??

My attorney said that once all that stuff comes out, THEN the war begins. Today was just piddly stuff. TRIAL will be the grand show.

So he said not to fret if I don't feel like I'm getting my fair share. We have plenty of ammo to hurt D!ck.

And nice, considerate D!ck -- you know.. I was debating whether or not to give him a Christmas card? He's on the phone when I walk in the waiting area. He moves down far enough for me to PURPOSELY complain in the phone about having to be here, to invite his accountant buddy to lunch when we get out, and says that Bimbo is WAITING FOR HIM IN THE PARKING LOT.

What an a$s! So he's not going to let up on trying to upset me.

He needs to burn in he!!. He really needs to. Merry F-ing Christmas, D!ck.

What a jerk....but you know that it is all your fault that he was there instead of with his Bimbo...NOT!!!!!!! But that is how they think of us. Well just forget about that a$$ for now and enjoy the holidays as best as you can, K?

Having a judge order support / back support usually means that he will have a warrant issued for his arrest if he does not comply. So, I'd "judge" that as a big victory.

I agree with Neese - whooo hooo! Not only did you get what you were entitled to, the judge has had his first glimpse at what a d!ck D!ck is. He has just wrapped that first coil of rope you gave him to hang himself with.

HH,

You should consider this a small battle won in the war. Win one battle at a time.

The trial will be the main event. We were in court in the hallway several times before the actual trial. And my WH didn't behave like D!ck, but he wouldn't ever look my way or even acknowledge that I was there. And yes, this all hurts, feels awkward, is sad, etc. but you have to do it.

I can't believe he brought bimbo with him. Even my WH didn't bring Miss Mullet to court. What a stab to the heart.

Try to have a good holiday in spite of this. Do it for you and the kids....

Hey HH, late to the 'party' sorry.

Just wanted to say I am thinking of you and praying

I like to think of myself as a vengeful person. A Sith would be proud of me...

But--if he will not let up on you, then do not let up on him either. You and Chai are amoung the few BSs for whom Plan FU is appropriate.

Go to war on him.

HH,

You didn't lose, you maintained or gained in perceivences.

The bottom line is you still don't know what G-d has planned for you. Please put all your trust and focus in him and seek HIS guidance for how to prepare and walk through this.

You are loved and admired by so much, but I KNOW that the blessings that come are from G-d. Pray for his will in all your A and KNOW that he is there watching, protecting and turning it to good.

Merry Christmas my friend..

Accept each little victory as it comes. YOU were the victor in this first skirmish. The judge corrected WH's perception that he could do what he wanted with the finances and have no consequences.

I am so glad you have a good attorney. They are certainly worth their weight in gold.

Remember to breathe - and take care of you.

There IS an end to this darkness - keep walking and you will find it.

Fox

Thanks, again, for the wonderful support and encouragement. I am blessed -- I really am. And grateful everyday for my life.

And I have accomplished each and every goal I set before me. Goals related to me and the kids and the house and the finances. Well -- I need to lose weight because I started eating again -- but that's the usual New Year's resolution, not a "real" goal.

I trust in the Lord. I trust in my judgement. I trust in what matters. I'm not interested in drinking the kool-aid D!ck has tried to force down my throat for the past two years. That is the difference. I've detached enough to see D!ck as the d!ck he is.

And my latest goal? To get through Christmas buying the same amount of gifts for the kids and my family and friends. And I did it! I did...mostly thanks to early planning and... tee-hee... gift cards charged to a certain credit card in October. The irony is that THAT credit card's monthly charge is one of the expenses that D!ck has to pay that came out of court yesterday. So thank you, D!ck, for INDIRECTLY giving us all a very, merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas Holy.

You too Pep!

Holy, how has your daughter's basketball gone. She's varsity now right?

Chris... Nice to hear from you. Yep, she's back at basketball but still on the JV team as a sophmore. Considering she hasn't handled a basketball since last season (due to her passion for water polo), she's pretty rusty. We've had two tournaments and a few practice games with league starting after the holidays. Don't expect DD to be the star, but I'm proud as heck that she's commited to play again. She plays three sports, is on honor role, and won the school's history day competition and will be going on to the county competition. Whoo - whooo.

I read up on your post as well. Always interested to hear about DD and the train wreak of Wayzilla. DD reminds me of my neice who's now a junior in college and the top engineering major. Her Dad dumped my sis and her for a cowboy queen. Between the new horse trailors and buying a ranch outside of town to house their horses, XBIL has no time for my neice. And she, too, played basketball through her junior year of high school. She just had no interest when her dad wasn't around her senior year. And my sister went through a double empty-nest wammy losing both her H and her daughter to college out of town.

And Wayzilla -- love to hear stories of poor choices leading to poor luck. I know we're not suppose to dwell on these, but it helps the healing some.

And Pepper -- fully, fully believe that when a person is right with God, they are right with the world. And I believe in forgiveness. But I can't wish forgiveness upon another until that person makes the effort. Your H was right in getting back on track.

Prayers for our waywards are truly needed. Prayers that they hear and obey the word of God. It's really that simple.

Yup, and you can pray for a day of reckoning while on this earth because the alternative is eternal.

Im on my way, I see you are on and I just needed to wish you a Merry Christmas and tell you that I am thinking about ya. I'll be back in a few hours if you need someone to spend time with. Love ya girl.

The day is almost half over.

Yes, but what about agnostics, atheists and members of other faiths that remain faithful? What do you feel causes them to adhere to their promises? Clearly, they are not relying on faith in the Lord . Yet, many are good, honest, faithful spouses.

I agree, Zelmo. Each of us have our inner reasons to remain good, honest, and faithful spouses.

But in my sitch... both WH and I are born, raised, practicing Catholics. Well... WH WAS practicing until he went AWOL. Our parents, our siblings, our children -- all believe in the same things.

Therefore, I hold true to the belief that WH needs to find his way back into the arms of God... back to his core values.

WH -- er -- D!ck has done a 180 in the worst way. He spits on the very beliefs he's held near and dear to him his whole life. And it's not just his beliefs in regards to spirituality -- he's done a 180 on his role with our kids, on our finances, on everything.

He no longer cares about his reputation -- "It's nobodies business" ... that people see him out with bimbo (he brought her to his office Christmas party)... that people are not trusting him at his job (he's lost a few respectable clients).

So...the farther and farther he gets away from his core spiritual life, the worse and worse his life becomes.

Our priest once had a sermon about our inner compass. How we have various factors which make up our compass -- our family, our jobs, our finances, our friends, our morals, etc. Basically, if one part gets way out of whack, it affects other parts. Like if you are spending too much time on the job, then your family may be neglected. If you are in debt, then your relationships may suffer. You need to try to keep a balance for harmony.

But if your compass has taken a radical change in direction... like when you are used to going towards God in everything you do or think or believe and you are now going towards the devil... well, ALL factors will follow in that direction.

And D!ck is the poster child for this. He's pretty much broken every commandment every day with the affair just being part of the problem. His job, his finances, his relationships... everything has been negatively affected.

So in my situation, I PRAY that the Lord will intercede and bring D!ck back into the fold or bring this prodical son into the slops of despair that he WANTS to return to his Father's home.

Yep, me too. Altar boy and the whole Jesuit education deal. Just did not want folks to get the impression that the only those of the Christian faith are viewed as having integrity.