Hi All,

One of my friends who has been helping me through my own situation with WH has an issue of her own.

She is in her 60's and has been married for 6 years to her husband (both had their spouses die from their previous marriages). Her husband is very quiet and was horrified by what my own WH has been doing. In fact, he has been watching for my husband when he does security duty at local bars.

She had no reason to suspect anything was wrong in her M - her husband treats her very well and his behavior has not changed at all recently.

Husband was having squabbles with his children and my friend had opened his email to see what his children had been saying to him. This is when she came across an confirmation email from an "adult search" service that her husband had paid for. She thought this was strange. The next couple of emails were his username and password. She printed these and then logged on to the site. It is an adult site which allows him to look at porn as well as to hook up with local adults who would be interested in varying degrees of a relationship - anything from sex talk to full blown sex. From what she can tell, her husband has only looked at pictures, but has not contacted anyone.

My friend is really scared and needs advice on how to proceed. She wants to confront her husband, but wants to make sure that she has sufficient evidence before doing so. She had me check facebook for her today to see if her husband was on there and he does NOT appear to be. I want to log on to this site she found with her to make sure I fully understand what she is seeing. I can't do this until next week when her husband is not at home with her. I also want to check his internet history for her as I know how to do that.

Any advice or recommendations from the vets on how to proceed. I am hoping she has caught this really early and that he turned to site because he was too embarrassed to buy a Playboy magazine. Regardless, she has a problem that she will need to confront. I want to help her as she has been very supportive to me and is a wonderful person.

AM, tell her to download and install eblaster or spectorpro and watch him for a couple of weeks before she says anything. go to www.spectorpro.com. She can download it from there and install it in about 5 minutes.

Have her do this before she confronts him so she will know exactly what he is doing. If she confronts him first, he will go underground and she may not get the full story.

She can have the reports emailed to another computer with eblaster. With spectorpro she has to access his computer every time.

For example, she could install eblaster on his computer and have the reports sent to a web based email address like yahoo or gmail, which she can access from your house. She could come to your house and look at the reports on your computer. [or even the library]

Hi All,

I have Spectorpro as that is what I used in my case and how I got ALOT of information. It has been uninstalled now, so she should be able to use mine.

She printed out some emails for me today showing that he does have a facebook account, but I cannot find him on there, even with the information she has given me. She also found a confirmation email from Yahoo that he had new secret questions for his account. His regular email is through aol, so that pretty much confirms that he has more than one account. This is smelling really bad to me. I guess we won't know anything for sure until we install a keylogger. He has a laptop, so maybe eblaster would be better. I will find out more and let you all know what we find out.

Thank you for the help!

Tell her not to have unprotected sex until she figures the whole thing out. Looks really bad, though. Sorry!