What color cape and tights are you wearing today, Pep?

I'm posting nekked, as usual.

PLEEZE. I just ate.

El natural...

Well, maybe.
Anyone watch the "Puppy Bowl" on Animal Planet. Pretty good.

Hamsters were maning the blimp. Bunny rabbits were cheerleaders.

You are right, again.




The wisdom I've received has brought me some strength, and validation.

I have fought the fear of his reactions and have been asserting myself in healthy ways.

But still have some fears.

I'm just not where I want to be yet.

Thanks Pep.

I can't even respond...

That's why I asked what do you do if you have a personality disorder. Is there a treatment? Because if there isn't, what's the point? I do believe many of those symptoms can describe several aspects of my personality, yet I'm pretty sure I don't have an actual disorder - just a personality. That personality includes certain weaknesses - many of which I am aware and do my best to overcome or avoid situations where they could get me into trouble. I mostly succeed but I've had the occassional blow-out that later I could look back and see that I grossly over-reacted. I don't think I'm the only person alive who has ever experienced this.

And regarding emotional immaturity, I've been thinking for some time - long before this thread appeared - that WXH had shown many aspects of emotional immaturity throughout our marriage and even beforehand. Some of the things he told me about why he loved OW so much - compared with how he used to be back when we were dating - they are very similar. Nevertheless, I still highly doubt he has a personality disorder, even today. Yes, he's immature. Yes, he's selfish with an overblown sense of entitlement. And yes, he's an all-around POS. But he's not really anything like the list of symptoms - they match me more than they match him.

In any event, if there's a way to overcome any of those symptoms I'd like to know. Some of these touch on areas I've been trying to improve on long before my life was derailed by adultery.

I'm with Churchill on the fear, deal.

Are you asking us if we fear you Pep? Do you really want to know???

sorry I couldn't resist!

Thank goodness.

I'm a small greenish nekked guy .... not scary, right

It's been such a long process for me.



And this is why I think it's been a long process for me. Instead of "getting out" sooner, I have selfishly been waiting for my husband to fix his issues to make my life easier, instead of me facing my fears and getting out of the crazy making.

I am constantly torn because my husband is in counseling, working on these issues. And I am too. And there are many things he has changed for the better, and that I have changed for the better. So I either need to be patient and wait, and quit being unhappy about the wait and the lack of empathy, or face my fears and get out.

I haven't given up hope. I stay in limbo because of this.

I wish I had a crystal ball.

When did you become a guy? Was it painful? What did they use as an appendage?

I had to give this some thought. Yes, I do fear myself. I fear that I will completely and totally lose myself, by my own hand, before I make it out of this abyss.