What are you going to be doing in response to his coming home?

I wouldn�t contemplate him coming home for good any time soon. While it isn�t unheard of, it would be very unusual. This is a marathon, not a sprint. Buckle up for the long haul.

And don�t worry about what HE does. Focus on YOUR Plan A. Otherwise you truly will wear yourself out and go crazy.

Did you send the Facebook emails? If so, that was one heck of an exposure and you deserve some kudos for it.

Interesting that they didn't text while he was "at the store."

He is really mad at me. He came for dinner and I could tell he was stressed and angry but I cant believe he even came. He seemed more mad because its obvious the A is ending.

The screaming stopped because I just calmly kept saying I wanted to save our marriage over and over. He didnt stay the night obviously, but I made dinner and was loving, I rubbed his shoulders and told him he seemed stressed and he said he was.He didnt storm out like he seemed he was going to. He thanked me for dinner and everything and left.

I guess I just feel like knowing whats happening now. Are they saying their goodbyes and having a few last nights together?? Or what??

Last night is the first night I actually slept in what seems like FOREVER, I actually feel like theres light at the end of the tunnel.

No, the affair is not ending. You have just interfered a little. [very little - you brought a pea shooter to a gun fight] They are regrouping and making better plans to keep it hidden. He is just trying to scare you into silence becuase he knows if you really do a nuclear exposure, you really will ruin his affair.

They are still texting this morning also. Its so frustrating.

Like I said, the affair is not over. They are just a little irritated with you. The OW is probably freaked out that you found out so your H told her he would shut you up.

I have exposed it to those closest to us. His brother has already called me this morning telling me hes going to go over to the business and confront him, he is furious.

See how exposure works? The more the better. The purpose of exposure is to bust up the affair (adultery) based on honesty and saving the marriage, not out of mean spirit to interfere with their "Happiness."

Larry

Don�t worry about what HE does. Focus on YOUR Plan A. Otherwise you truly will wear yourself out and go crazy.

Thank you so much! (I said earlier I dont have any family or many close friends) So I have told his father, brother, my best friends, my sister-in-law and they all want to be supportive of me and say they are on my side but none of them really want to get involved. His brother is the only one that really wants to talk to him, hes also the one saying that I need to work on myself and be prepared for the worst. Everyone else cant believe he still isnt willing to come home and that I shouldnt even talk to him.

I am definitely working on my Plan A and trying not to think about it because I know I will drive myself crazy. I am deep cleaning my home right now so that it feels VERY welcoming. My husband actually texted me saying he didnt feel well and was going to here at 1 to rest.

This is why plan A can only be a few weeks. You can not go on forever PAing him, and he leaves to spend time with OW. I hope you are getting an idea how effective EXPOSURE is.

It is not a tool you will have forever. Trickle truth will give WH/OW time to "spin the story" to others around them. Have you exposed to everyone? That right now is your best bet. It very well may be your only bet.

Did I miss the answer to the FB question? Did you expose this on OW's side?

No I havent exposed it to her FB friends, I have exposed it to the mutual friends we know, but they also dont want to get involved. They say they dont want to have anything to do with her, but I dont think they are going to even say anything to her.

It would be nice if you could expose her to her family, kids, mom or whoever. They are not afraid of her. Doesn't sound like she has many friends.....I know! look in low places for her friends, like the local crack house.

KK, that was how exposure was in my sister's case. It was like the first wave of attack. Then when they kept texting each other, my sister did the second wave of attack, the FB exposure.

I don't think anyone pressure her OW to end the A or said anything nasty to her, but someone forwarded her the FB email and said, What's this about? She was MORTIFIED. She denied it to everyone (she even made up an elaborate story about how the A was with her friend, not her and explained to people that my sister had gotten the wrong story from WH!) and OW would not come near my sister's WH with a 10-foot pole...the texting and all contact ended!

I really think the FB exposure would be very effective in your case. It would be best to do it now while your WH is still fuming off yesterday's exposure. I don't want you to look back and regret not doing it, that's why I am pushing you to reconsider.

Hang in there!

I know that the full exposure is probably the only way its going to work. My brother-in-law wants to get his dad over here on Sunday and tell my husband to come over for lunch or dinner and instead of eating we all confront him with printed emails and they tell him that they know everything. I know my brother-in-law is definitely wanting to do it, but I dont know if my husbands dad would be on board yet.

I would email her close family and friends on FB right before the meeting, so that it is one nuclear exposure like you guys said instead of doing it at different times. I feel it will be beneficial to also have my brother-in-law here because my husband is going to be furious and it will be easier on me if I have someone here.

Oh, she also hasnt updated her FB since I called her (and shes the type to put a couple posts a day) A couple friends have even posted saying something about I hate it when you dont answer you phone, and another commented Join the Club.

Sounds like shes in hiding or something.

Hiding. Oh yea. She knows what is coming.

Larry

She knows what is coming and she is in damage control, spinning her story to all who will listen.

Exposure is not a weapon you can use forever. It is best soon, nuclear and direct and to the point.

What are you waiting for?