Do I sound too naive for my age?
Maybe because I don't have such a huge experience when it comes to relationships:
Started dating round 20.
My first love happened to be my bf - he was completely loyal to me until the affair I was telling you about, and I was completely loyal to him before all this.

After I found out he had fallen for someone else...al those years I had been loyal seemd such a waste of my life: I had been there, I had only been interested in him, shared everything with him, and the result was that he wanted to be with someone else..

Let's see. The BF cheated on you and then came back and now doesn't want to be intimate with you. The second guy knows about the BF and doesn't care, since he's not sure he wants a long-term relationship with you anyway. What about this situation makes you think that either one of these guys will ever be marriage material?

Ain't gonna happen.

Ditch the guys, ditch the therapist, and then start working on yourself. Figure out who you are and what you want and don't get involved with anyone else until you do.

"I just don't know about morals.
Before I thought I believed in some things...
Now, I just don't feel like anything is worth anything. Sometimes I just want everything to end, so I don't have to decide anything. I'm such a coward.."

I think this is the crux of your problem. Get a different therapist, or spend the money on a pedicure - at least then you will feel better.

I agree with the others, learn to live alone and work on yourself and get healthy BEFORE you get into another relationship.

Okay Play_the_Game (interesting choice of screen name me thinks)

Go back and read Just Learnings post to you. He hit all the highlights you need.




Just a weencey bit.

I see a way to kill both trolls with one stone!

I agree, ditch the counselor who is telling you to sleep with two men. Go to this thread: Guilty and desperate for hope and hook up with guiltybutterfly, who wants to give her old fashioned traditional husband a three-way. It seems like a win-win...

PTG:

What are you not getting?

BF#1 = Cheater

BF#2 = Cheater

PTG = Well, you know...

Just stop, get off the merry go round, lick your wounds, cry, examine yourself and resolve never to be a cheater or get involved with another one.

Your problem is you are afraid to hurt BF#1's (cheater) feelings by admitting you are cheating on him, AND, you are addicted to BF#2 (cheater) and can't bear the thought of leaving him.

I am starting to confuse even myself, it sounds like "The Cheating Bachelor, Bachelorette" show...

I thought of it FIRST! Instead of "The Rose Ceremony" they could have the....hmm let me think

SWW

BRILLIANT!

Well at least the . . .(s) have gone vertical.

Prove to yourself that you are strong enough to be just fine without either man. Prove to yourself that you still have morals and should not be sleeping with multiple men (even if one is rarely). Honestly, why are you still with these guys? One already cheated on you and you haven't had sex in months. The other has already failed in marriage is trying to steal you away from the boyfriend you are living with. Neither one is a suitable candidate for a life partner. You can do better. Shoot, not having a boyfriend is better than these two options. Once you have learned how to be happy on your own and not settle for dysfunctional relationships, then you can start looking to date again. Date with you head, not just your heart.

This therapist is a moron. This therapist seems like the new age type that is into astrology and has been married 3 times. This therapist will only lead you astray. Seriously, be objective for a moment, what kind of therapist would advise you to continue to live with your boyfriend and continue to have sex on the side with another guy? Don't you question their credentials?

"Cheating Bachelorette, will you please accept this condom?"

Cheating Bachelorette, smiling sweetly. "Of, course." Kisses Cheating Bachelor on the cheek.

Chris steps forward. "Shank-Ho's, this is the final condom of the night."

Good one! Unfortunately that was what I was thinking too. I already called ABC, or was it CBS, whatever. It's Mine, MINE MINE!!!

Oh gosh, can you just see the little silver tray with all the nervous bachelor's waiting for their names to be called, and the cheating bachelorette calls em up and says, "Joe, would you accept this condom?"

With tears in his eyes he says yes and goes to join the other proud bachelor's with their condoms taped to their lapels. Sniff, I choke up just thinkin' bout it...

Now...ahem, where were we?

SWW

You are too late, it's already a show on VH1. It's on after Rock of Love and I Love New York, and is followed by Tool Academy and For the Love of Ray J.

Actually, the therapist is living with a partner (is not married) and he specifically told me that morals and guilt should be my last concern, and that I have to try to solve some aspects in order to be happy WHATEVER I decide in the end (man A, man B, both or none ... )...I don't have sex with both of them: only with the second man, sometimes, when we meet (is sort of a long distance relation) and not anymore with my bf, because I would feel to ashamed to be close to him although I'm not being sincere...

Ummmmmmm.......well.......ummmmmmm....Nah..

I'll take door number one.