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I went to my therapist yesterday and he suggested a book "After the Affair"
anyone read it and was it helpful?
Are there any other books that have helped anyone else, I'm like a sponge now.
BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
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The best one is Surviving an Affair followed by Lovebusters by Dr Willard Harley. I would get an extra copy of Surviving an Affair and ask the counselor if he is familiar with it. If not, he has alot to learn. He should be helping you follow the plan in Surviving an Affair if your marriage is going to make it.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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hey MelodyLane,
I have already ordered Surviving an Affair as well.......I have been following the advice on this site and from all the wonderful people on the forum and so far so good.
BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
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Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 383
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Books I've found helpful:
Well, the Bible for one.
Another book that I just finished is called "My Husband's Affair Became the Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me" by Anne Bercht. This was a great book. Unfortunately she didn't have MB while she was going through it so she got some bad advice (like not to tell anyone about the A) but she also did a lot of things right. I noticed at the end of the book she highly recommends MB and Dr. Harley's books, so she caught on at some point. I thought it was a very candid, inspiring book.
I also like that in parts of the book she has both her WH and her DD write their own experiences and thoughts while they were all dealing with his affair.
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thanks I think I remember that book, I think Oprah had the author on her show....I'll research it when I go down to the book store, thanks, and of course the Bible is also on the table.......
BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
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Posts: 27,069
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"Infidelity: A Survival Guide" by David Don Lusterman is a good one.
All of the Harley books are great.
As I recall "After the Affair" was more about how to recover together after the affair, and not so much guidance on step by step on how to save your marriage.
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thanks, putting it on my list.....so much homework now......but a believer in being well informed and trying to prevent any steps backwards at this point....
BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
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Posts: 27,069
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Have you called the Harley's? They will give you a plan that will work.
Are you cooperating on divorce? Shouldn't be.
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we are trying to see if we can get past the affair and work on our marriage.....we do have a therapist working with us already but I'm a research type of personality and to be informed is strength.....I've read all the Harley's stuff and some of the books he has recommended....
BW 56
WH 57
Married 25 years, live together for 2, dated 2 years before that.....
DS 23, DS 25
D-Day Nov 23/09
NC Mar 1/10
Working on Recovery
Grateful for finding Marriage Builders
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