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#2362996 04/27/10 08:59 AM
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This post is supposed to help encourage those who might feel discouraged in their present situation.

The idea is that there is opposition in all things. Good has evil, light has dark, and righteouness has unworthiness. How would we know what real joy and hapiness is, unless we know what real pain is, and how we overcome that pain? Would we be able to recognise what heaven is like if we have not experienced some sort of personal hell in our lives and over come it?

The other option is to do nothing, escaping the harshness of growth, and live a life of mediocrity. Taking the easy route through divorce, or just hopping from one temporary happiness to another temporary happiness. We will never know what joy we can have in a long lasting marriage if we can�t endure the pain of someone elses mistakes and learn how overcome them.

We can not fully grow and understand the happiness of a long lasting marriage unless we can figure out how to overcome the problems in our marriages as a couple. For all the posters here, the strain in our marriages were caused by adultry. By working Plan A and Plan B, and trying to save our marriage we can find the tools to enjoy our marriage because we know what hell an affair can bring to the marriage.

These problems bring to my mind two spiritual stories that I want to share:

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PUSHING AGAINST THE ROCK
There was a man who was asleep one night in his cabin when suddenly his room
filled with light and the Savior appeared. The Lord told the man He had a
work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin. The
Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might.
This the man did, day after day. For many years he toiled from sun up to sun
down, his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the
unmoving rock pushing with all his might. Each night the man returned to his
cabin sore and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain.
Seeing that the man was showing signs of discouragement, Satan decided to
enter the picture placing thoughts into the man's mind such as; "You have been
pushing against that rock for a long time and it hasn't budged. Why kill
yourself over this? You are never going to move it? etc."

Thus, giving the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he
was a failure.

These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man even more. "Why kill
myself over this?" he thought. "I'll just put in my time, giving just the
minimum of effort and that will be good enough." And that he planned to do
until one day he decided to make it a matter of Prayer and take his troubled
thoughts to the Lord.

"Lord" he said, "I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my
strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have
not even budged that rock a half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I
failing?"

To this the Lord responded compassionately, "My friend, when long ago I asked
you to serve me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push
against the rock with all your strength, which you have done. Never once did
I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push. And
now you come to me, your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But,
is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your
back brown, your hands are callused from constant pressure, and your legs have
become massive and hard.

Through opposition you have grown much and your abilities now surpass that
which you used to have. Yet you haven't moved the rock.
BUT YOUR CALLING WAS TO BE OBEDIENT, TO PUSH AND TO
EXERCISE YOUR FAITH AND TRUST IN MY WISDOM,
this you have done. I, my friend, I will now move the rock."

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SILVER REFINER
There was a group of women in a Bible study on the book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three, they came across verse three which says: "He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver." (Malachi 3:3) This verse puzzled the women and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God.

One of the women offered to find out about the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible study. That week this woman called up a silver smith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn't mention anything about the reason for her interest in silver beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver. As she watched the silver smith, he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities. The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot--then she thought again about the verse, that he sits as a refiner and purifier of silver.

She asked the silver smith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined. The man answered that yes, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left even a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed. The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silver smith, "How do you know when the silver is fully refined?"

He smiled at her and answered, "Oh, that's easy--when I see my image in it."

If today you are feeling the heat of the fire, remember that God has His eye on you.

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I love both of these. I'd heard them years ago but forgotten them. Thanks!


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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These posts come at a perfect time for me. thank you


Bh-me-45
xWW- 45
Married 15years, together for 20
served D papers on 6/2/09
Divorce final 12/19/2010

Custody of our 3 kids
DD 12
DS 10
DD 7

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" ...
the period of greatest gain in knowledge and experience is the most
difficult period in one's life ... Through a difficult period, you can
learn, you can develop strength, determination, and courage to face the
problem. Who gives you this chance? Your enemy.

Dalai Lama

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