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Joined: Oct 2006
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Put a voice activated recorder in her car. You can get them almost anywhere and for not much money. Buy a lot of batteries.

I agree with everyone else that you should focus on meeting her needs, but continue to listen to your gut, and snoop.


Husband was unfaithful to me before and after our marriage, at least 7 times. I found out 13 yrs into the marriage. Trickle truth for an entire year. Several different d-days, so it was more like a d-year. Difficult recovery.



Joined: Oct 2009
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Originally Posted by SicFeeling
OK

I think it is my I security, but everytime something as innocent as stopping for groceries makes me wonder if it is an excuse.

Yesterday she called off from work and cleaned our house like crazy. It needed some attention but after asking her about what was going on it makes me wonder if there is some guilt or avoidance of some one at work.

All I have is a couple of strange texts and unknown names an numbers. There is no 'hundereds' of calls or texts.

I am feeling somewhat reassured by your responses, but still am looking.

Didn't you say she just started that job? She's called off twice, now. Does she like her job? Is she feeling guilty for going to work?

I'm still not really seeing the A potential, sic. I agree - install a VAR in her car, just to confirm & so you don't drive yourself crazy.


D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!

Joined: May 2010
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Thanks.

I am very focused on her needs right now.

I am able to see her cellphone calls ( numbers and times). What do you think I would learn with the VAR in the car?

I did activate a location service on our phones and got a strange location last night that quickly changed to one that made sense.

She has only called in sick once in 7 months. It was the timming so close to our intense conversations that made me wonder.

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Sicfeeling, I have read through your thread and think you should step up your snooping. Can you hire a PI? Doing a better job of snooping will help you rule an affair in or out.

Other things you can do is put a tap on your landline [Radio Shack], a GPS on her car here and flexispy on her cell phone. Flexispy won't record conversations but it will send you the full text of any text messages.

The second thing I would do is start scheduling 15+ hours a week together of undivided attention time. The purpose of Marriage Builders is to create a romantic relationship and this is the foundation. This program does not work without that essential ingredient. Undivided Attention


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Trust your gut....


Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!
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