Ok I have to be careful because I think she is reading this web site.
My wife was put on a temporary project by her employee located in different cities. This was late in the fall of last year. For the first few months there were no problems. We talked everyday we could and everything was fine. Then she went to the final city. After about a month she started saying don't call unless you have something to say. Most of our calls were the silly nothings that married people talk about. She was under a lot of pressure so I just chalked it up to that. Then she started with how she has been unhappy for our whole marriage (20 years). Then I received a warning that she was doing things that she shouldn�t be doing. That she had spent the night with someone else. I was able to confirm this in a different manner. So I tried to ask her about the warning and all of sudden I couldn�t get a hold of her. This was late spring. I finally got a hold of her the next morning and asked her. At first she blew up asking who was I going to believe the person that gave me the warning, have no idea who that was, or her. Well I told her that I believed the person. I was driving at the time and told her I had to go because I didn�t want to get in an accident. She called me later that day and continued to deny it. So I told her how I had confirmed it with another source. She continued to deny so I said good bye and hung up. She finally admitted it. For about 5 weeks she refused to stop having contact with this person. Since she was in another city I couldn�t do anything other then ask her to stop. Of course I still can�t do anything to make her stop other then tell her if she doesn�t that we are done.
I�ve started going to a counselor and reading this web site. I understand I am not at fault for her making the decision to do what she did. I also understand that I haven�t been the husband I should be. It seems like we make progress and then something happens. She hasn�t had contact with him that I know of for the last two weeks. I can�t do exposure because it would have serve legal consequences if I do. I can�t explain, but it would.
We have two children and they both know. Not because of me, but because of her. They are really anger at her, but I think they would forgive her if she gave them a chance. Some days she does and others she doesn�t.

Ok I have to be careful because I think she is reading this web site.
My wife was put on a temporary project by her employee located in different cities. This was late in the fall of last year. For the first few months there were no problems. We talked everyday we could and everything was fine. Then she went to the final city.

You say this was a temporary project will she keep working out of town from time to time?

After about a month she started saying don't call unless you have something to say. Most of our calls were the silly nothings that married people talk about. She was under a lot of pressure so I just chalked it up to that.

Then she started with how she has been unhappy for our whole marriage (20 years).

Did she have specific complaints?

Then I received a warning that she was doing things that she shouldn�t be doing. That she had spent the night with someone else. I was able to confirm this in a different manner.

So I tried to ask her about the warning and all of sudden I couldn�t get a hold of her. This was late spring. I finally got a hold of her the next morning and asked her.

At first she blew up asking who was I going to believe the person that gave me the warning, have no idea who that was, or her. Well I told her that I believed the person. I was driving at the time and told her I had to go because I didn�t want to get in an accident. She called me later that day and continued to deny it.

So I told her how I had confirmed it with another source. She continued to deny so I said good bye and hung up.

She finally admitted it.

For about 5 weeks she refused to stop having contact with this person.

Was she still out of town working during this time?

Since she was in another city I couldn�t do anything other then ask her to stop. Of course I still can�t do anything to make her stop other then tell her if she doesn�t that we are done.

Was she back and forth from the other city to home or gone all the time?

I�ve started going to a counselor and reading this web site.

I understand I am not at fault for her making the decision to do what she did.
I also understand that I haven�t been the husband I should be.

It seems like we make progress and then something happens.

What is the progress? What happens to stop the progress?

She hasn�t had contact with him that I know of for the last two weeks.

Can you confirm this?

I can�t do exposure because it would have serve legal consequences if I do. I can�t explain, but it would.

Legal consequences for Who?


We have two children and they both know. Not because of me, but because of her.

Did they know before or after she admitted it to you? How old are the children?

They are really anger at her, but I think they would forgive her if she gave them a chance. Some days she does and others she doesn�t.

I can�t do exposure because it would have serve legal consequences if I do. I can�t explain, but it would.

It would involve time spent in a federal pen.

No. The Like I said I think she may reading this site. When I say company I am speaking of a fed agency that has different rules then the rest of us. She did nothing that would be illegal in the normal day to day world.