I haven't given up on you NP. Not by a longshot. I'm just very concerned with how close you are to delivering this baby and the fact that you still have this wayward drama going on. I still believe that you and lil bean are more important then the marriage at the moment and that you need to get away from this drama. I still do not have a good feeling about your WH. How long do you think it will be before he needs another OW fix?

Also, if you are introducting MB concepts, articles, etc. please make sure that you do NOT bring him to this forum yet. He is not ready.

Wow, I go away for a few days and all this! How are you holding up, NP? First it is a good sign he is willing to do the questionaires and speak with Steve. However, you need to be ready to move to plan B if he continues contact. You do NOT want a wayward H at your delivery. (((NP)))

Hi everyone,

So finally got a chance to get back on here after talking to Steve!

He was pretty amazing, and both WH and I had a good talk with him, separately. WH said after he seemed pretty outstanding, but he was waiting to make more judgements until after they talk again. I REALLY had a good feeling after talking to him, though, and I think he can really help us, as long as WH is willing.

As it stands right now, Steve wants to talk to him further. He said WH is still unclear on the fact that he has an "injury" to fix from his affair, instead of going off his emotions and running off with OW. He said he feels confident after one more talk that WH will understand this, and then we can begin to work on actually fixing our marriage. He got WH to agree to NC with OW - he gets the feeling WH is looking at it like a temporary thing, but he said that was fine, that we'd be able to extend that for the rest of his life. WH is supposed to give me a written agreement, but I'm not supposed to ask about it, just let him give it to me.

The main message seemed to be - wait for a couple days, let him talk to WH again, and we will go from there. Plan A in the meantime.

I do have hope still. I know it IS easy to become jaded and pessimistic but I still love my husband and I still have hope.

Petals, I was filled with such apprehension when WH came back to you. I was so sad to hear about the slip but am really glad you've managed to get him to talk to Steve. Trust him and stick to the plan he gives you.

Pulling for you!

Thanks Vibrissa. I still have concerns and apprehensions too. WH still hasn't given me the written agreement he talked to Steve about, about NC with OW. I will be patient and wait, but I'm worried as long as he doesn't give it to me, there is contact.

I can only hope he's going to be honest with Steve as well, so that we can truly get the help we need.

I have such faith in the Harleys that I believe if we do this properly, we CAN have a wonderful marriage. I will follow the plan he gives me to a T! It just depends on how WH responds to all of it, and if in the end, he is honestly willing to work on our marriage.

I told WH this morning I was going to set up more appointments with Steve and at first he balked and said we didn't have the money, until he gets a steady job. Realistically, this could be a while...he works here and there but it's not steady. We're not in bad financial shape just now, but if he doesn't find work within a few months we will be.

He had a shower, and after when I approached the subject again, he agreed readily - I pointed out we had just spent a ton of money on stuff for our lawn, which we don't NEED, and we NEED Steve. He must have thought about it while he was in the shower because he was very willing. I'm just hoping this last ditch attempt will be the thing that saves our marriage - nothing else has so far.

Set up two more appointments for us on Friday (Steve wants to talk to us each separately for our next appts).

Hoping and praying SO HARD!

Petals this is GREAT news. Very happy about this development. My only fear is he is going through the motions until your little bean shows up and then it's "This didn't work, I tried my best, see you later." I hope, hope, hope that isn't the case. And you know, if he keeps going through the motions now hopefully they'll stick.

Keep coaching with Steve. It's the best investment you can make right now for ALL your future happiness.

Hoping and praying right along with you Petals.

OK -- back to plan A for you, young lady!

I'm very happy that you are counseling with Steve. He has a way of being so logical that it cuts though the wayward fog. He will reach your WH.

So, last night in the middle of the night, I was half awake (I never sleep well anymore).

WH must have thought I was fast alseep. He rolled over and kissed my forehead and said, "I love you. *another kiss* I love you very much."

I didn't say anything when he did it .... just in case HE was dreaming and thought I was OW (the thought makes me ill). He hasn't told me he loves me in months.

It's nice to know he did that, and yet I wish I could be confident it was meant for me.

That is priceless NP, priceless.

He meant it for you. He did.

He will be tempted to give into his addiction to OW but that was for you. You know he loves you though he has created this big mess.

May you two recover.

It was meant for you, of course.....NP.

Yippeee!!! I can almost taste that pepperoni & anchovy pizza right now!
It was meant for you, NP.

WHEW, I didn't want to get too hopeful about that! It definitely made me feel just wonderful.... AND, I looked at his email yesterday and his BB this morning and it doesn't seem like he's contacted her since Saturday night.....

I'll split that pizza with you!

POSOW texted WH again and complained about how I was still talking to her husband, and she was upset bc I allegedly told him WH and I are in counselling and our marriage is on the mend. Now, this is lies on many levels, since a) I haven't been talking to him as it just causes more problems, b) last time I talked to him I said I didn't know if we were going to work on it, and c) I never even mentioned MC to him at all.

WH called me up to see if I was still talking to him and I said no. He said he believed me and deleted the text, and wasn't going to respond. Supposedly.

She makes me mad. Why is it even her business if our marriage is on the mend? And why should she text WH about it? Stupid wh*re face.

You need to have your husband BLOCK her number! Why hasn't he done that yet??

We're still getting to a point where we are even working on the marriage. He talked to Steve on Monday and he indicated he wasn't totally willing, but they are talking again on Friday. I'm hoping at that point, I will be able to make these demands, but Steve told me to hold off on pushing too much right now.

Me tooooo....

I see another MB party coming...ya think LG will let us use the pool again?

Heck, I'm in! Just gotta bust this kiddo out and I can be right there in that pool with ya! lol