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I don't think I want to involve my job. All the higher-ups know about it. I can expose more on fb????? Should I? I'm sending my plan b letter to ow today. Someone asked me today, "aren't you ready to move on?" i'm not sure how I feel about that question.


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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
I don't think I want to involve my job. All the higher-ups know about it. I can expose more on fb????? Should I? I'm sending my plan b letter to ow today. Someone asked me today, "aren't you ready to move on?" i'm not sure how I feel about that question.

If all the higher-ups already know about it I would expose at your job anyway.


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EXPOSE EXPOSE EXPOSE!

This trickling exposure is not working, you need to let EVERYONE KNOW, don't worry if your scared everyone get's scared when they first do it, I know my husband was terrified, but he got the balls to expose my A and guess what? IT WORKED! He did it on FB where everyone saw, me and the OM friends and family.

EXPOSE the A

Last edited by SapphireReturns; 05/24/10 01:46 PM.
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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
I think my fear is that what if the affair is over and I'll be exposing without need. I could still expose on fb more as I have a list of her friends. I guess I worry how it will effect my job. I can't email teachers since we are in same district, but I will try to make contact with lake friends. How can I know if it's still on with him out of the house?

First off, the affair is not over. If it was over, he would be contacting you.

I am not sure what you mean by it effecting your job? In what way? There is nothing wrong with exposing an affair.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
I don't think I want to involve my job. All the higher-ups know about it. I can expose more on fb????? Should I? I'm sending my plan b letter to ow today. Someone asked me today, "aren't you ready to move on?" i'm not sure how I feel about that question.

hope, what bothers me is that you only did a little tiny exposure on facebook and then you cancelled your account. Your account is hidden so anyone who tried to contact you back was met with nothing, which harms your credibility. So that made it possible for the OW to spin the story. With those 3-4 I exposed to, BOTH of them sent back sympathetic emails asking for more information.

You did just enough to tick off the OW and enabled her to paint you as a nut by deleting your account.

I would do another major exposure on fb, along with the lake exposure and then leave your account open. You will likely get questions and they need to be answered. But you can't cause the OW any trouble this way.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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If I do this tonight, I need another FB form letter....I can't find the other one. Also, should I wait till late? My kids are all running around right now. I thought that I would include something about him forwarding his mail there....do you think? I only sent out to about 9 people before. I mean it's been about 2 weeks since I did all this....will she see this as harrassment? I'm tired of being nervous and sick to my stomach.


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Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
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Ok, I did find the other one I used...here it is and let me know what you think.

Dear friend of OW,

It grieves me to write this letter but I believe all of her friends should be aware that she is having an affair with my husband, *****. They have been having this affair since at least March according to the evidence. We have been married for 20 years and have 4 children, ages 14, 11, 9 and 7. They are heartbroken about their father�s affair. I found out about this on April 27th after overwhelming evidence. I plan on fighting for this marriage. As of today, he has recorded his change of address at her home.

I would be happy to provide the evidence to anyone who asks.

I am asking that you use your influence with OW to persuade her to leave my husband alone. You should also watch your own husbands around her because she is no friend to marriage.



Last edited by hope_eternal; 05/24/10 06:37 PM.

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What do I do if either of them tries to text me or call me? I know it will happen.


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expose at work then sit tight

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HopeE, is this your real name? You need to edit that out.


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Personal R in works
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Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
Ok, I did find the other one I used...here it is and let me know what you think.

Dear friend of OW,

It grieves me to write this letter but I believe all of her friends should be aware that she is having an affair with my husband, *****. They have been having this affair since at least March according to the evidence. My Private Investigator caught them together at her home on April 27th, 2010 around 9:30pm. We have been married for 20 years and have 4 children, ages 14, 11, 9 and 7. They are heartbroken about their father�s affair.

I plan on fighting for this marriage. As of today, he has recorded his change of address at her home.

I would be happy to provide the evidence to anyone who asks. Please email me at hope@aol.com

I am asking that you use your influence with OW to persuade her to leave my husband alone. You should also watch your own husbands around her because she is no friend to marriage.


Thank you,
xxxx


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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I did edit...thanks...I didn't mean to do that. I'm really wrestling with doing this.....I mean she has been having huge waves of exposure and embarrassment since this all began.

Why am I doing more exposure exactly? I also worry about her contacting my friends and telling some crap about me. All the same things I worried about before, but worse.


BS: 41
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Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
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second thoughts:

Originally Posted by hope_eternal
Ok, I did find the other one I used...here it is and let me know what you think.

Dear friend of OW,

It grieves me to write this letter but I believe all of her friends should be aware that she is having an affair with my husband, *****. They have been having this affair since at least March according to the evidence. My Private Investigator caught them together at her home on April 27th, 2010 around 9:30pm. We have been married for 20 years and have 4 children, ages 14, 11, 9 and 7. They are heartbroken about their father�s affair.

I plan on fighting for this marriage. As of today, he has recorded his change of address at her home.

I would be happy to provide the evidence to anyone who asks. Please email me at hope@aol.com Please contact me at hope@aol.com if you have any follow up questions.

I am asking that you use your influence with OW to persuade her to leave my husband alone. You should also watch your own husbands around her because she is no friend to marriage.


Thank you,
xxxx


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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That's fine with me. Is that a real email for me or do I need to put my real email address? When should I begin doing this? Do you think husband will call his aunt lawyer and tell all? My lawyer told me not to mess with anymore facebook. She said it would hurt my case.


BS: 41
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Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
That's fine with me. Is that a real email for me or do I need to put my real email address? When should I begin doing this? Do you think husband will call his aunt lawyer and tell all? My lawyer told me not to mess with anymore facebook. She said it would hurt my case.

I would put your real email address. Doing this has never hurt anyone's case before. Just the opposite, it has helped the marriage recover by causing as much trouble as possible.

one of those facebook ladies I exposed to sent an email asking how you were.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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oh, really??? recently? Ok, when should I start? Also, can you send me another email so I will have it?


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I know everyone is probaby sick of my see sawing on exposure. I'm sorry I continue to repeat the same concerns over and over. I know that if this marriage is not saved, it's because I could not follow through. I guess they just win. It's not what I want, but I'm tired and maybe they deserve each other.

I need to protect my children now. I'm sorry that all this has happened and I've been lousy at stopping it. It's just crap!!! I'm going to do my best on facebook tonight and then I'm done. They seem to be able to endure it all; it really must be grand for them.


BS: 41
WS: 52
Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
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DD 15
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Originally Posted by hope_eternal
I know that if this marriage is not saved, it's because I could not follow through.

That is so not true!!! You have done a stand up job, hope! I am in AWE of how you have navigated your fear at every turn and not EVER allowed it to stop you from doing the right thing.

Everyone is afraid. EVERYONE. But what separates the men from the mice is doing the right thing even though you are terrified. And you have done this over and over again.

Lets put this into some perspective. You came on here 4 weeks ago and were scared to call your SIL's house and ask for your husband. Since that time, you have busted your H over at the OW's house, exposed them at school, exposed the OW on facebook, filed for divorce, moved your H out the door and gone into Plan B! And you think you have not done anything? faint

You have been SCARED to death at every turn, but you still did it. You walked through the fear and did what needed to be done. So, if your marriage does not make it, it will not because you didn't do enough, hope. You are a BRAVE, STRONG, GODLY WOMAN and I am proud to know you.

clap



"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Thanks Melody,

I just feel so weak most of the time. I was so hopeful tonight talking to my brother. He finally got a job!!! It gave me hope that there may be some light at the end of this tunnel. I will get this done tonight.

I've also been contacting some of his other family members here on facebook. I've heard from his stepsister and she is supportive.


BS: 41
WS: 52
Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
Plan B....5/21/10
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Ok, I've sent out about 10 and then I got another warning...so I guess I'll hold off for a little bit. I need some support here that I'm doing the right thing. I'm really nervous.


BS: 41
WS: 52
Marriage 20 years on 6/9/10
Dday on 4/27/10
Husband moved out 5/12/10
Plan B....5/21/10
DD 15
DS 11
DS 10
DS 7
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