Well, sure. Having a boyfriend who is married is a huge ego boost to women who have extremely low self-respect and self-esteem to begin with.

"Oooh, he's got a wife and he could be with her but he's IGNORING HIS WIFE for ME!!!!"

"HE'S LYING TO HIS WIFE for ME!!!!'

"WOW, I AM SOOOO SPECIAL!"

Once these guys get divorced, and suddenly they're just another divorced loser hoping to score some azz, you have to wonder how attractive they are to these kind of women now.

And what kind of life is this for women, anyway? How is this progress or equality? Being equally as stupid and promiscuous and sexually destructive as men doesn't sound like "progress" or "equality" to me. It just sounds like a one-way ticket to Aloneville with a lot of hate from the families they have intruded on (and often helped destroy) along the way.

What I can't figure out is why they call these skankho's "HUSBAND STEALERS." Husband stealers, my [censored]. These men don't leave their wives for these skanks. They are not "stealing" anything except some crumbs on the floor. They just use them as unpaid wh*res. From the article:


Men rarely leave their wives for some skank. These ho's are nothing more than cockroaches looking for crumbs at the table of some other woman's life. Why in the world would any decent person volunteer for that? I cannot even fathom the reasons...

But they do leave their wives for the shankos...look at how many of us are in plan B on this forum and some on plan D.
Come on. The article is wrong. Maybe in the past...my dad had many A, but did not leave my mom for the OWs. Those were other days. Now they do leave the wife for the shanko. Is all different now...
blessing

The article is not wrong. It says they are "rarely willing to leave their wives" and that is the truth. The statistics are still the same: 95% of affairs die within 2 years. Yes, my H left me for his skank, but that still doesn't mean it is the rule. It is the exception.

MB would not be this popular if that were the exception Melody. Here on MB is the rule.
blessing

Disagree. The ones that don't break up far outnumber those that do by about 10 to 1. The ones that do break up tend to stay around because they need the most help. Even so, going by the population on this board is not an accurate statistical analysis because it is not a true cross section.

Melody how is a 10 to 1 possible when 50% of the US population is divorced? you might suggest that not all M that end up in D have experienced an A as the reason for D...but I bet many did..
blessing

huh? Atena, we are talking about marriages than end from AFFAIRS, not the national divorce rate. MOST marriages do not end over affairs. 95% of affairs END within 2 years.

Here is what Dr Harley has repeatedly said about affairs, and his data is based on widely accepted studies in this industry:

Infidelity statistics


22 percent of married men have strayed at least once during their married lives.

14 percent of married women have had affairs at least once during their married lives.

Younger people are more likely candidates; in fact, younger women are as likely as younger men to be unfaithful.

70 percent of married women and 54 percent of married men did not know of their spouses' extramarital activity.

5 percent of married men and 3 percent of married women reported having sex with someone other than their spouse.

22 percent of men and 14 percent of women admitted to having sexual relations outside their marriage sometime in their past.

90 percent of Americans believe adultery is morally wrong.

50 percent of Americans say President Clinton's adultery makes his moral standard "about the same as the average married man,'' according to a Time-CNN poll.

61 percent of Americans thought adultery should not be a crime in the United states; 35 percent thought it should; 4 percent had no opinion.

17 percent of divorces in the United States are caused by infidelity.
Source: Associated Press
here

Ok. I see your sources. But I do not see any cited sources from the article. It is easy to generalize. Each case is different, as we know. And in the age of Facebook and easy communication...things are changing and relationships are becoming more and more difficult to maintain.
Cheating is becoming easy to do and the ability and willingness of people to stay in a M is decreasing. The idea of "I want to be happy, I deserve it" has created a lot of fertile ground for affairs.
I give Italy as an example. An italian man, 20 years ago, would have never left his wife for the mistress. Never.
Now they do. My brother's friends from college are all divorced and he is the exception. Once left his wife for a russian balerina, the other left W for W best friend right on wedding day. Yet another maintained a mistress with an apartment and a kid in another town and then decided to leave wife for her. Another one hooked up with HS sweet heart and they both left their families to be together.
This is a big thing in a catholic country like this one. Things are changing fast...I am only using personal observation.
blessing

atena - you may be confusing "Men who don't leave their wives" with "Betrayed Wives who dump their cheating husbands".

It could well be that in Italy, the wives are simply not tolerating it any more. Is the WH going to say, "My wife threw me out because I was cheating and would not stop"? Doubt it. He'll just brag to his OW about he dumped the old hag for her, even though it isn't true.

Virtually all WH want both a wife *and* girlfriends, and they stay in the marriage as long as they've got both. They don't care how upset the BW gets - that just lets them blame her for being such a b*tch and say that they have no choice but to cheat because their wife is so horrible.

But WS *do* leave and divorce when their BW finally stops tolerating it and he realizes he's no longer got both. That's what happened to me. Once the ADs kicked in, I was able to disconnect from him and just stay away from him even though he still lived in the house.

He moved out and filed for divorce about two weeks later, even though I had been very upset about his cheating and lies for *years*.

He didn't care how upset I was or how much damage he was doing to all of us. No, he only cared when he no longer had his wife AND his girlfriends (yes, "girlfriends" plural - office tramps who worked for him, and strippers, and a metric buttload of porn, and on-line gamer women, and Roller Derby chicks, and no doubt prostitutes.)

That's why married men leave. They leave when they no longer have *both*.

Melody Hell Lane, was that your experience as well?

But you have no cited sources with which to refute this, Atena. You admit you are just going by personal observation. Anecdotal evidence is not evidence.

No, I kicked his [censored] out.

ha! I shoulda known better!

Mine left because my son went to college and he wanted to be with OW.
Every case is different, but I do agree that now BS do not put up with adultery that much any more.
In the case of my brother's friends, they all left their wives cold turkey. Once did not show up at the altar as he eloped with OW the day of the wedding. The relationship with OW did not last and he does not look that good to me the last time I saw him. My brother told me he went thru several other relationships and none of them works. This guys is only 42....
blessing

I have no evidence you are right. I go by observation but I do see a lot of unhappiness and broken families.
blessing

Atena, every case might be different, but this does not nullify statistics that show that most affairs die off and never lead to marriage. 5% of affairs do last long enough to get to marriage, but that does not nullify the 95% that DON'T. You can't disprove a rule by the exception, that makes no sense.

But see, my observation is the opposite. So don't our anecotal observations cancel out each other? I live in a very conservative culture; [Bible belt of Texas] you live in a liberal culture, so our anecdotal observations are very slanted, and therefore, not representative of society as a whole.

You're right, I guess I am thinking that when they leave for OW that counts...but actually even when they do leave for OW, very often the A does not last that much and they and up either in another A or begging their BS to take them back...either way they realize the mistake they made when and if the fog lifts.
blessing