He jus called me and spoke to me for 35 minutes telling me how he doesnt recognize me anymore! That all this craziness is making him loose pieces of what he felt for me evreytime we have had an episode!

He told me this person is not my wife... my wife is a strong person who would stand on her own and find a way to get through this That she would find a way to work things out in the end!

She would avoid doing LB and AO and the obsessing with the OH

That if me and the OH are playing a game that the OH has brainwashed me!

If you want a chance to try to work things out you need to get your self together and calm down!

He doesnt know where this leaves us at all.

Mark I think well I know you are correct!

I have to stabalize myself by changing what I can within myself.... My work is suffering and everything else is as well.

I really need to get a grip on my self!

I go to bed early last night and I miss everything! ROFL! but it looks like you got tons of GREAT advise! I agree with scotland, dont talk to OWH or OW, take care of yourself today, do this one day at a time. You have to be strong, take your anger somewhere else either get on here and vent it out, or grab a stick and pound it on your bed. I know it sounds ridiculous but it works! Go on a run or a bike ride with your girls, do some activities threw out the day so you are not thinking about all of this mess. Do you have the day off? Just keep going Lisa! We know you can do it, stick to your plan!

{{{Lisa}}}

Lisa, did you start the meds yet..get them at the pharm and start them NOW!!! Listen, I completely understand what you are going thru...I know what it is like not to be able to control your emotions, I feel for you because I can completely relate to you.

People telling you to control your emotions...when they are almost completely out of your control...I think the anti-anxiety meds work quicker (is it something like ativan)....Hon, I didnt save my M...and its due to me doin the stuff you are doing. Right now, personally, I think the meds are the only thing that can control your emotions right now....Get them and take them NOW!

Thanks I am working on getting them! My PCP and my therapist are talking. Hopefully I can get them now! If not I will have to go to emergy care!

Yes, I truly beleive you need them asap...You remind me so much of myself and I know they will help you a great deal...

This isn't good enough. You need to track down anyone on her side who can put pressure on the A. Get a list together.

Your H should have deleted his account himself. That fact that you did so is controlling and I can see where he would be miffed.

Exposure. Read about it and implement it. That's your first order of business, Lisa.

Lisa, you have GOT to remove yourself from this drama! Stop talking to OW and her H. Your WH is blaming you for any negative vibes that are occurring right now. You've got to remove yourself from that.

You are trying to control him and you can't do that. Only yourself. I won't rehash what other posters have said because they've already made their very good points. But I will say that it seems to me he is on the fence right now, and you're pushing him over to the other side. Remove yourself from this drama!

I was just orescribed Lexipro! So lets see how that goes!

Thats what I take, It works good for me....did they give you anything to calm you down like ativan or somthing?

Lets take this one day at at time.

today lets have you do this.
1. Dont talk about the A or your relationship to your husband.
2. Dont talk to OW and OWH
3. Start taking your medication to help you relax
4. After work go out with your girls, to the park, outside, etc have fun with your girls
5. Go for a run today or tonight, see if your girls want to come (how old are they?
6. Keep yourself busy today, so you don't have time to think about what is going on.
7. Dont think about what your husband is doing, just what YOU are doing.
8. If you talk to your husband only talk about the kids.

Lets just focus on this today, ok? But YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW threw lisa! You have to promise us that you will do your best today.

We know you can still save your marriage, but talking about the A and the relationship is messing everything up, he is not ready to choose what side he is on.

Lisa, that's exactly WHY he causes all the drama. He pushes your buttons, you go nuts, and then he walks away and plays the poor little victim of his crazy insane wife.

Do you really not see this? You have to stop playing into his hands.

Oh, and as far as "I wouldn't mind if YOU dated someone else" is concerned: They all say that. It both excuses their conduct and drives you insane, which is what they want.

Stop playing into the hands of a cruel selfish wayward and his homewrecking girlfriend. You're giving them exactly what they want and it's working perfectly - for them.

Also: Did you tell WH that OWH has threatened him? Did you notify the police?

Stop talking to either OW (especially) or OWH. Just warn WH and then shut it off.

If you cannot get in to see your regular doc today, then yes, go to the ER. Tell them what's going on and have them give you Ativan. Lexapro will take at least 2-3 weeks to kick in. Ativan works right away to kill the anxiety and let you calm down.

That's what I missed - did OWH threaten Lisa?

No, but he threatened her WH to lisa....

They will not give me ativan because it is to addictive.

Ugggghhhh....

I was just told that my mdeication costs $125 dollars! I want to just cry
I can not afford that in anyway!

Jeez, lisa I am sorry the med thing is not workin out for you...goodness!....Can you fill half the script for now and half later? I wish I could help you more, I just know the ativan would help you so much....Did you ask if there was anything similar that you could take that wasnt addicitive....I take trazedone. I am not sure if that is in the same category though, but I think it is faster acting....

{{{{lisa}}}}

I used it in small amounts (0.5 mg once or twice a day) and had no trouble. ALL of that stuff is addictive, including the ADs and including Lexapro. Xanax is even worse (and I thought Xanax was horrible anyway.)

You just have to be aware of the addictive properties of something like Ativan and not abuse it. As I said, it's all addictive.

Talk to your pharmacist. There are programs out there that may be able to help you financially.