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he feels entitled to his a's since you give him lil attention. its probably engrained in him now. even if you two rekindle, you would probably grow bored with him. thats just how entp's are programmed. i should know. good luck!
prd What does this have to do with Marriage Builders??? 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
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---my husband and I live together now as of Feb of this year. The baby does make me slow down and think about staying in the marriage. cgirl, your marriage is very salvagable. I would not suggest that you go to marriage counseling, though. We clean up their messes around here every week. Marriage counseling has an 84% failure rate and they don't have the slightest idea how to save a marriage. They have a higher divorce rate than the general population and are little more than divorce facilitators. Go check out this article here about how Dr Harley learned to save marriages. His program is like nothing else out there in that it really works. Marriage Builders is different in that they use a behavioral approach with the goal of ROMANTIC LOVE. The premise is that feelings follow actions and it works. Your average MC doesn't even believe that is possible.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Jun 2010
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Thank you guys...interesting info about marriage counseling. I am a little apprehensive about the whole thing. This is all really new, I found all of this out a week or so ago. I'm in a little bit of a "fog" trying to sort through complexities of feelings.
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he feels entitled to his a's since you give him lil attention. its probably engrained in him now. even if you two rekindle, you would probably grow bored with him. thats just how entp's are programmed. i should know. good luck!
prd What does this have to do with Marriage Builders??? compatibility has everything to do with marriage building one would think/hope?
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Joined: Apr 2001
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he feels entitled to his a's since you give him lil attention. its probably engrained in him now. even if you two rekindle, you would probably grow bored with him. thats just how entp's are programmed. i should know. good luck!
prd What does this have to do with Marriage Builders??? compatibility has everything to do with marriage building one would think/hope? Palerider, this is Marriage Builders. And if you knew anything about it, you would know that compatibility is CREATED using these concepts. Please familiarize yourself with MARRIAGE BUILDERS before you post to people in need here. The sign on the door is Marriage Builders, after all.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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**************************EDIT**************************
Last edited by MBsurvivor; 06/14/10 09:24 PM. Reason: TOS disrespect, disruptive
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Joined: Oct 2009
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Please help this poster learn Marriage Builders concepts! Post if you can help in that regard. If not, then refrain from posting!
mbsurvivor11@gmail.com
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**********************edit*****************
moderators note: please email me at mb.survivor@gmail.com
Last edited by MBsurvivor; 06/14/10 09:46 PM. Reason: TOS disrespect, disruptive
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MelodyLane is another person you should really listen to cgirl. She is very very good.
If they have "happily recovered" or something similar in their signature, pretty much listen to them.
They have been there, done that, saved their marriages, and not just saved as in, settled and made it work...
saved as in IN LOVE WITH THEIR SPOUSE!
What melody said is exactly what the goal of MarriageBuilders is.
You can learn the habits that lead to romantic love, or you can sit back and say "I dont have to change, its not my fault I am a aloqwepoiqw personality type" or any other of a million excuses.
Get His Needs, Her Needs from your local library system.
It can single handedly open your eyes to what is possible if you are just willing to try.
Read it together with your Husband, and learn it together.
Lifelong recovery never ends.
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BT, don't discount the "vets" who haven't recovered their marriages, either. I AGREE that MelodyLane is one to really listen to, but she is one of MANY.
cgirl, figure out what you want to do and read EVERYTHING on this site. Any of the advice you receive, you can see if it goes with what you have read. DrH is the EXPERT afterall.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING  Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Oh no scotland, I totally did not mean it like that at all...
I just mentioned Mel cuz she had just posted above me, the same as faithful follower who posted early on.
Scotland is a wealth of good advice, and really she is spot on... read all the info, get the books from the library, and compare everything people tell you to what you read.
Honestly, MB stuff just makes sense. When you read about the "right" way to negotiate, you will think, "Yeah, I know I SHOULD be acting like that, and I know I dont, and I might as well just grow up and fix it..."
Its kinda weird.
Its just teaching people how to be decent, loving people.
Lifelong recovery never ends.
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