Advice From "REAL" Men To Women <BR>-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-<P>Never buy a 'new' brand of beer because 'it was on sale.'<P>If we're in the backyard and the TV in the den is on, that doesn't mean we're not watching it.<P>Don't tell anyone, "We can't afford a new car." Tell them, "We don't want one."<P>Whenever possible please try to say whatever you have to say during commercials.<P>Please don't drive when you're not driving.<P>Don't feel compelled to tell us how all the people in your stories are related to one another. We're just nodding, waiting for the punchline.<P>The quarterback who just got pummeled isn't trying to be brave - he's just not crying. Big difference!<P>When the waiter asks if everything's okay, a simple "Yes" is fine.<P>What do you mean, "leering?" She's obstructing my view.<P>When I ask, "How many guys have you slept with?" it would be much appreciated if you did not answer honestly. (Note from me: Does My H feel this way and is that why he won't be totally honest?????)<P>When I'm turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the off-ramp, saying, "Oh, this is our exit, Honey," is not really necessary.<P>When you're not around, I belch so loudly that I even appall myself.<P>The temperature in the cave will be my responsibility. It will be slightly to moderately cooler than you want it.<P>SportsCenter starts at 10:00 P.M. and runs one hour. This is an excellent time for you to pay bills, put laundry in the dryer, or talk to your sister.<P>Is it too much to ask to have the bra match the underwear?<P>If we see you in the morning and at night, why call us at work?<P>You probably don't want to know what we're thinking about.<P>It's in neither your interest nor ours to take the Cosmo quiz together!<BR>
