Hi MelodyLane

Just letting you know that I've changed my Profile Name to

Ashb

Just as a precaution

Hi Vibrissa

Did you see that I've changed my Profile Name to

Ashb

Ash, are you working on confirming the identity of the OW so you can expose the affair today?

No need. Click the "notify" button at the bottom of this post and write to a moderator. Ask to change your thread title to something else (you choose).

I'm a day late and a dollar short!

Good luck Ashb.

I think I have 2 options.

I can hear 'her' name on the tape, but need a sound engineer to 'clean' it up to confirm

I'll call my lawyer on Monday & ask how to subpeona the cell phone records.

But I did tell his boss the OW's identity could be traced on the cell call logs & gave him the date/times to look.

You don't have to have court worthy evidence to expose, you just have to be certain. Are you certain it is her?

If you can hear her name on it, then that is your evidence. I would go ahead and expose the affair, starting with her husband. Just go down the line on the list I gave you. You can play the tape for the OW's H, but with the others just tell them that you have a tape recording of their conversation that confirms the affair.

85%.

I've ask my lawyer to get the cell phone call logs.
I know the date/time etc Thanks to the VAR.
All I need to do is then match up the number &......That's who it is

I can't tell you how awful I feel.
Like someone's put a red hot poker in my stomach
I can't eat, sit still, sleep

I am so sorry, Ash.

How long will it take for your lawyer to get the call logs? Can you not go online and get them yourself?

Is there any other way you could confirm its her? What about his computer? Have you scoured his computer? Does he use a computer at home?

Ash - I usually don't check in on weekends, but I'm glad I did this morning. I'm so sorry this is happening. Good idea to change your name and title.

First off - you need to know that your husband is gone. The man you loved, the man who helped you raise your children is gone. He has been replaced by the OWs boyfriend. That man may look like your husband, talk like your husband, even smell like your husband, but he isn't. OWs BF is cruel, evil, angry and vindictive. He will treat you cruelly and without remorse.

Because of this you MUST create a wall of support for yourself. Everyone must know what he is doing to you. Your sons, you family, your close friends. You need to surround yourself with people who love you, who will care for you, support and uplift you.

You must also take care of yourself. I know it seems impossible but try to eat, try to sleep. If you can get into you doctor, see him and ask for some anti-depressants. If you can, get back on your horses and go for rides. Disconnect from this ugliness as much as you can.

Do you think your husband will physically harm you? If so try to keep your boys or a trusted friend with you any time you interact with him. No matter what, make sure you keep a VAR on you at all times. Record every interaction you have with your husband. Let him know you are recording (if you have to legally, I'm not sure what the laws are on recording in your neck of the woods).

I'm glad you're talking to a lawyer. If you must file for separation for your own good - do so.

Stay strong and please take care of yourself. You can make it through this.

I will try to get back on but may not be able to this weekend. Just know that a prayer will be in my heart for you and your boys all weekend. Trust Melody Lane - no one knows this stuff better than her.

As for the future - it is up to you whether you want to save this marriage or not, it may be possible, but only you can decide what you can put your body through. You don't have to make this decision right now, but whatever you decide you must end this affair and protect yourself.

((((((Ash))))))

We're here for you, hon.

You know what I really wish.....

That you were All HERE, with me & giving me a great BIG HUG

You have NO idea how much your support means to me... I'm sitting here crying

Ashb---WE ARE!!!(((((Ashb)))))

from one semi-crippled horse riding addict to another.....i am praying for you!

Hi Nikko

It's good to know you're not alone.
It's a very strange palce to be

But how come 'semi crippled' what happened?
Don'e tell me a fall - man that hurts
My young bay bucket me off last October & I very quickly remembered why I prefered to stay on. It took 6 months of rehab on my shoulder!
Missed the FEI Para Qualifier for World Games in Kentucky - very bad timimg

I've spent all night - it's 3.20 am here - reading LadyLongLegs Thread.

It's like watching my situation in Fast Forward.
They even use Exactly the SAME EXCUSES

It really shows hoe PATHETIC the WS is

But I must say, spending the last 6 hours reading every post on her thread has made me smile, nod my head, laugh, cry, get angry.
It feels like my emotions are on steroids

they are still trying to figure out whats wrong....leaning towards ms....i have to have the scan done. kinda been putting it off.......i have days where i have "no legs" to ride with. not usually a good thing...lol but i will not give it up! i have a friend competing in the world cup for the us team...3 gaited. i think she was in south africa last time. i so wish i could go see her...she is an amazing young woman.

keep reading and learning....find ways to soothe your soul....horses were my sanctuary. i know it doesnt seem like it...but it does get better. take care of you and listen to the wise people here....

Hey - I've been diagonsed with MS - Feb 2007.
If you need any help regarding tests / diagnosis, Let Me Know

I've been and are going through this dreaded disease!

I'm having a REALLY bad afternoon.

This dreadful emotional rollercoaster !

I was OK this morning, had the boys & their friends here, which was a good distraction.
Then when I asked where WH was, my boys said they didn't know.
I asked them to text him, because he had said he would take some documents to a Client of mine, when he flew there Today.

They called me back & said he was already at the airport!

He had left without calling them or saying Good Bye to them!
Wonderful Father
He said to them 'He forgot' He was travelling & would be back Thursday

So my documemts didn't go with him.

My driver then asked me 'Where's WH's bike?'
He's a cyclist & has a very expensive bike.

Well, guess what, he's taken it to one of his friends as a precaution, in case 'I lose it'
as 'I am unstable and a drug addict'

So tomorrow, 1st thing, I'm going to the Doctor for Blood & urine samples for Drug Screening/Testing & at the same time, I'll ask them to test for STD's

I want that report sent to my lawyer, because from what I understand, they can also take a hair sample to see if there's any historical residue of drug abuse.

I want Every test known to man & happily do it every week.

OK, so now I'm angry again, which I suppose is better than crying!

By the way he's travelling with the OW, for this 'business trip'

Ashb....I'm just reading today after being gone for quite a while and see that you had read my story. I'm so sorry for your pain...I haven't had a chance to read your story from the beginning, but I know what you're going through. You have an added reason to take VERY GOOD CARE OF WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU....your health condition and the fact that you need to be healthy for your sons as well. I have a good friend with MS and stress is one of the worst things you can do that negatively effects your situation. Do whatever you can to reduce your stress, including perhaps going to Plan B FOR YOU. He's obviously got his head in a whole other place and he's not going to do what's best for you. I think you have a very good reason to not endure this nor focus your thoughts on him for long. It will cost you what health you have. I wish you the best. LLL

Ash, when will you be exposing this affair?