I've looked her up & it says she owns lawfirm.is there anything else i could do?There's so many firms that she's affiliated w/.I guess i'll research that some more.

I will try to talk to his mom again.Just trying to stay sain here.this is the worst thing i've ever been through.I really appreciate all ya'lls advice & support.

EXPOSE FIRST....to EVERYONE even OW's work, family and friends

Then start working on plan A

The you can start preparing for your plan B letter.

ok.I just was wondering about her work since shes the owner.I've looked her up & I've seen that shes affilated w/ different firms.looked up her address and theres a lot of them listed(addresses)Don't have a lot of $ so I cant hire a pi.

daddysgirl,
don't worry about anyone else, do what you want, go with your gut I did that in the beginning.
exposure, Plan B is a good start, stay strong, and come here when you want to vent.......
many of us have already been at the same stage you are at now.......
good luck and take care.....

ty jt,this is just sooo hard.Its nice 2 find some people who understand what i'm going through.

I just noticed that you are 36 and have been together with WH for 21 years (meaning you were 15 when you hooked up?) but you've only been married six years?

Why the delay in getting married? Is this your first marriage? Is it his first marriage?

Yes,I was 15 when we met.This is both our 1st marriage.I feel that he always had an issue w/ committment.All of this almost seems like a "crisis" 2 me.Sometimes I just felt like he felt he was missing out.He doesn't want 2 shair anything it seems cuz he says im not going to run his life,but that could be fog talk 2,I've read a lot about that.I got the whole I love you but i'm not in love w you,this has nothing to do w/ why i'm leaving you,you name it i heard it.All of this is so frustrating & heartbreaking.I do know that god is by my side though.I've just been praying a lot.

I'm in plan b & have done some exposure.I also let him know that his mom knows.I've just been doing a lot of praying here.I'm so scared & so very depressed.It just stinks walking around all of the time w/ a constant lump in your throat.I've been trying to do things for me though.Infidelity is oh so cruel!!!! I just love my husband so much & I'm just praying that he'll come out of the fog.I just went back to my original post so that people could see my whole sitch.Thanks for all your help out there.

If he's always had a problem with committment since you hooked up with him at 15, why why why would you continue to subject yourself to his cake-eating behaviors.....now leaving you 3 times for an attorney OW? You have no children, you are 36 and young enough to build a healthier happier relationship with someone else who will treat you with respect and love. However, I think you need to totally work on yourself and get into therapy to determine why you are so willing to let a man control you and treat you so poorly. This is emotional abuse.

Get yourself strong, don't spend your whole life trying to change someone who sounds like he's behaving like who he really is....a committment impaired self-absorbed guy. He doesn't treat you well and sounds like hasn't since you've know him if he's committment phobic as you say. Get out, get a new life and build yourself into an independent, strong, happy woman.

daddysgirl136,
I know this time period is so tough, I remember it well, I couldn't function, time went on without me even noticing.....I know you are scared, right now, just go minute by minute, then day by day. Just get through. I remember feeling better at the 3 week mark and thinking a little bit clearer, right now you have to take care of yourself. Your next plan is to expose the affair to everyone, so what if he is mad or if she is mad, you didn't do this they did......
Then you move on with your life, take care of the financial stuff so you are secure, take care of the details that bond the two of you.....
You tell him if he ever is ready to commit to you and your marriage that you would consider it but until OW are out of his life for good that you cannot or will not live your life like this any longer.....
He is in the middle of the affair fog and right now he is not the man you married........you are young still, don't waste any more of your life like this.....look strong and beautiful, make him see what he is about to lose.....
This leopard might not be able to change his spots.....sorry.....I know you are hurting, I hope you have someone around you to talk to and lean on, if not please feel free to message me when you want to talk......
I'm sending all my positive thoughts your way......
You are in God's hands, remember that.......

ty,ll I totally understand what you're saying & I have been going to counceling & working on myself.Things were wonderful right before we got married. We were very close & I thought that things had changed, I really felt @ that point that he'd grown up.I do realize that I can't change anyone & that's up to them & god. I just don't want to totally give up though & that's why i'm in plan b.I also realize that I wasn't meeting his needs so I feel that part of this sitch is my fault too,but I totally dig where you're coming from.Again,ty for your response.It just helps to have some people to talk to,those who are in my sitch.This is all very painful.

Ty,Jt I really appreciate your support.I am currently in plan b & I have done some exposure.I've been trying my best to take care of myself.I've been surrounding myself w/friends & family.It's just nice to have a place to go where people actually understand what I'm going through.People can sit there & say I'd do this & I'd do that but until they've actually been here they have no idea how very painful it really is.Ty for listening to me, I really appreciate you.