Hi Saddest,

Ya know, that sounds silly in a way, and a way it doesn't. I feel you are playing peek-a-boo with the vets here and also with your H, and your M. In terms of an internet based contact it is extremely difficult to really relate to anyone and even to surmize the right thing to say.

I've said this to Emo and I will say it to you. I think you have a helluva lot of pride, which in a way is good, but it is bad in your personal and intimate relationship. I.e., the primary one - your marriage.

I am now dealing with a W still in the nursing home and hardly a chance of us living together again, and my son who I am supporting now until he gets recharged and able to advance on his career. Nope, not looking for sympathy or anything like that. I am happey with where I am, what I can do in my situation, and I still have great faith. Went to confession yesterday just to try to renew my faith and to recharge and recommit. I am not a 'spring chicken' anymore - more like a fairly trim Rooster Cogburn, but ya know what, I am happy with that - with a droopy eyelid, gray hair, less energy than ten years ago, but still with my faith, courage, and the committmetn to do the right thing until the day I die. Yea, I have thought about other women like your husband has and like a few around here who I have met, but i haven't taken any action on that. First reason is I am too scared, and second it that I know down deep it would violate my vow that i made back in 1969. So go figure Saddest, but please don't play peek-a-boo with anyone here, and more importantaly, yourself and your H.

Take care and try to climb out from the covers,

Tom