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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 417
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 417 |
I am wondering if it is ok to write a letter to husband, after stuffing things away.
It think we have started to stuff things away, and forgive eachother before we even bring up an issue to the other. It's seems rocking the boat isn't worth it, but I've found that the more I do stuff things away, the more sad I get....big or little things really get to me.
I've lately been writing things to him, in a nice way, so I could get everything out--nice and neatly--without interuption, then let him read everything.
Is that an LB? I'm sitting down to write my one of my famous letters, and it seems overwhelming for me to even write everything that has been bugging me?
I'm really overwhelmed with everything right now....
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,043
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,043 |
me&him, the easiest way for my H and I to communicate "difficult" subjects is by writing them.
I do think it is important to reread your letters so you can look them over for LB's and DJ's. Keep the letters about how you feel about such and such. Don't blame or assume you know what he is thinking or feeling.
Here's a big one: If you want a reply ask for it and be spacific. No yes or no questions, but questions he will need to answer in his own words.
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 417
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Joined: Apr 2003
Posts: 417 |
I do agree that I need to be specific when i want an answer back, but I feel selfish, writing about all the "wrong" things we have done this past weekend...I feel like i am lbing down the line....i think my thoughts are all important, but i fear that he will really feel bad, since things have been covered up pretty good...i'm scared to "let him have it" with this letter.
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,043
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Joined: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,043 |
I don't think you should let him have it. The letter should serve to relay YOUR feelings about events, NOT to point how he was wrong.
If, for example, your H told you he would take you and the kids to a movie this past weekend, but failed to do or metion it.
You would tell him that it hurts your feelings because you feel ignored or unimportant to him. You were looking forward to spending time as a family and thought he was too. This makes you feel____.
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