I'm following you Allen...post:34 It is weird coming from like 7,000's?

Remember me. The OM is the supermarket manager.

BTW I just saw today OMW for the first time in 2 years. I will start a tread or will try to find an old one that I left behind in this forum.

I'm not supporting your OM or others who intrude on marriage. The OM bears some blame but you can't MAKE him take responsibility and wasting energy on him is just that... A waste. Your time is better spent building your marriage.

Allan, and friends. Welcome to MB.

Since this is your first day here at MB, might I suggest that you take a look around. Understand that there is a lot of help here. We will NOT however, hold your hand and say, "there there dear, it will be alright." We WILL, however, help you learn MB principles and concepts and help you learn ways to implement them in your own life.

You are NOT responsible for the infidelity in your marriage, unless YOU had an affair. You are however, responsible for 50% of the state of your marriage BEFORE the affair.

There is much debate and many posts about how mean the posters here are and how unwelcoming we are. I will put it to you this way, you just walked into our home, took your shoes off, put your feet on the coffee table and decided that you wouldn't even introduce yourselves or learn any of customs and "rules." How would YOU welcome someone like that into your HOME? This is what we think of MB. It has been here for many of us during our darkest moments.

Again, welcome. Please start by reading here to learn more about us. http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2370240#Post2370240

Hi Allen,
June72 here. I have not posted to DB in ages but have always been following along. I am really bothered by the DB site administrator's behavior of removing people's threads and banning others for not following in complete unison with MWD thoughts are concerning infidelity. Why just today there is a poster in the infidelity site, HopelessinLove, whose wife in in a confirmed PA affair, he is stating today that the DB phone coach told him that after his exposure he should help his wife more with the chores!!! Seriously!
Worse, people posting that they were upset that you and Puppy were banned had their posts erased almost immediately. I think I will be refering to that DB site as the new "China"- lol! Seriously, posts have been dissappearing all day long!
Anyhow, I posted on the Divorce Busting FB page that I am saddened by what has transpired on the Message Board. The wall response (for all to see is that no one has been banned!-lol!)

Anyhow, folks, Allen is amazing. He is like a walking encyclopedia of facts and statistics from all the marriage experts. He has read all the books and he and another poster Puppy Dog Tails were life savers for the people over there.
Such a shame.

I think if Allen is not ready or wishes to wait to share his own story I think then he should definitely be left alone, IMO. When he feels ready I am sure he will post his own story. I actually do think I know some of it from all his posts and this man is awesome- he really has stood for the marriage.

BTW, it is true, MWD does not allow disagreeing opinions concerning infidelity and posted a letter last week stating how it ruined one couples chances of recovery b/c the betrayed spouses family found out about the husband's sex addition. She has a "Bo-Peep" method, as coined by fellow DBer's Do not tell people, and try to be the better option or wait the affair out. I never could get how you can outshine the other person all exciting and new.

Best

That sounds an awful lot like Plan A here. Are you advocating NOT meeting the needs of a wayward spouse while trying to save a marriage?

Hi Dgtal and June... Great seeing you guys here... Let me get caught up...

This thread is a reunion and discussion of events that happened in another forum. I do not understand why you have come here to post about DB.

This forum is Marriage Builders. We are here to help you apply MB concepts to your marriage.

Please, no more talk about events on DB.

Censorship? Again? Seriously?

MB. Again. Seriously.

Let's do MB here. Are you here to get help with MB concepts?

For I don't know how many times now. I am here to read. I am here to welcome anyone from the db forum here who is fed up with their censorship BS, and I am here to learn.

I do not wish to discuss my marriage right now. I just GOT here... you guys need to learn how to welcome people better.. honestly... and i thought I was pushy.

I think I am just gonna start a new thread... This is ridiculous lol

You are absolutely correct this IS ridiculous. RFB?

Are you here to read and to learn about MB? That is what this forum is for.

All new posters are welcomed here, as you have all been, by many people.

If you are here to read and learn, you can do that without opening a thread to discuss "censorship" and your treatment on another forum.

You do not have to discuss your marriage. You do not have to post at all, if your interest is in reading and learning. Many people read here for a while before posting. I did for two years.

Then read everything on this site, then when you are ready by all mean post.

In the mean time lets have this guy read this web site. Please no more posts about saving his marriage when he is ready he will ask.

Allan this is my last post to you until you have any questions about saving your marriage and using the MB concepts ok?

Good luck.

P.S once you are ready to start posting, I highly recommend you start a new thread TY and Welcome

I tried to read and learn but I was getting bullied with borderline abusive conjecture about my marriage.. presumably this was to prompt me to open up or some such...

I think I am just going to move my thread into General Discussion.. someone's exchanging cooking recipes over there... maybe I will be more welcome there...

Wow, THANK YOU Sapphire.. THAT is how its done people.. is that so hard?

Thank you again... for I think the first time I actually feel welcome.

Let's end this bickering, please, and get back to the business of marriage building! If you have a complaint about another poster, please click the notify button and let the moderators handle it. Don't make me break out my censor button!

Thank you all for your cooperation!

OK guys, I made another thread here for dgtal, eeyore, june, vulcanized, and anyone else that's looking for me.

Please send them on over here... people are trading recipes in General Discussion, lets hope we won't meet with too much trouble there :

http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/u...flat&Number=2432810&#Post2432810

I personally feel very unwelcome here folks! I think I will refrain from posting and just observe. I mean does this site not allow casual chitchat? No, I really am asking, I do not know.
My very first post and I get basically flamed. Yikes!
Blah!

All the best folks... take care!

I started a new thread June.. lets let this one die a slow death at the end of the queue..

june, people are most certainly welcome to casually chitchat. However, THE most high-trafficked board here, SAA, is more a triage unit for folks who are, well, actively surviving an affair. In addition, you will find many vets there who have successfully survived infidelity (whether M'd or D'd at the end of it all) who continue to help new posters.

So when somebody starts a new thread there, and is a new poster at that, the typical occurrence is that the new poster is, in fact, seeking help for their marriage in light of infidelity.

If that is not the case, no one has a problem with that. I think the move to GQ is a good one, and will echo the advice to continue perusing this site at your leisure.