Thank you every one for your support and advice. DNM, you are not sounding like a broken record. I read through your posts and I can see where talking with a MBC was a real turning point for you and I applaud you for that. I guess for me right now I am just burned out with talking to them. I have been to 4 in the last year and I am just sick and tired of talking about it. I know that JC takes a different approach and WW has talked with her twice. I guess I am just in that pit and right now it is hard to do anything.
I had to go back in to work last night and finish up a project that we are launching Monday. Got home around midnight and watched a little tv. We dvr all of our shows and usually watch them throughout the week. FF through commercials is awesome. I watched one show that my wife has expressed that she doesn�t really have any interest in, so I sat down and watched the 3 episodes that I had. While I was watching them I started to remember how WW would always belittle me and just make smart comments for the type of shows that I would watch, we have similar taste but also very different when it comes to comedy. I finish watching and go to bed around 2am. WW had told me I could wake her up when I got home but remembering all that I just didn�t want too. I fell asleep and woke up about 2 hrs later and was feeling very frisky so rolled over and put my arm around her. She responded and we started to cuddle. After about 30 min I had to just get up and leave. The whole time WW never touched me in that special place and mind started to race that if I was the OM she would have already attacked me. Based on all the crap she said to the POS. So I got up and came downstairs and got a D MT Dew and went into the garage and smoked a few cigarettes. Went back to bed and went to sleep. WW asked me this morning, why I got up last night and I just said I was thirsty and left it at that. I didn�t want to send her off to work with that to deal with. We had already had a very hectic morning as WW overslept and I was half asleep trying to get the girls ready for school so they wouldn�t be late. Anyways probably TMI but a sucky day is a normal day.

...I finish watching and go to bed around 2am. WW had told me I could wake her up when I got home but remembering all that I just didn�t want too. I fell asleep and woke up about 2 hrs later and was feeling very frisky so rolled over and put my arm around her. She responded and we started to cuddle. After about 30 min I had to just get up and leave. The whole time WW never touched me in that special place and mind started to race that if I was the OM she would have already attacked me. Based on all the crap she said to the POS. So I got up and came downstairs and got a D MT Dew and went into the garage and smoked a few cigarettes. Went back to bed and went to sleep. WW asked me this morning, why I got up last night and I just said I was thirsty and left it at that. ... a sucky day is a normal day.

2 things before I go to bed, thank you for your honesty everyone. 1st thing is I did make clear intentions for SF, I made the 1st, 2nd and 3rd move. Not verbally but physically. It wasn't me just putting my arm around her, it was the special places I touched. WW and I have been together for 17 years and there is no doubt in my mind that she knew my intentions. Especially since she has been asking for SF lately. 2nd, not sure how my 1 post has labeled me as a liar. Habitual at that. Yes honey, you look fat in those jeans. WPG will tell you I have always been brutally honest. But I wouldn't dare tell her she looked fat in her jeans, which she doesn't. Would you.

A big part of bringing more sexual fulfillment into our relationship was that I learned to own our sex life. I'm the man, I have the testosterone. So I learned to initiate, almost every time. When she initiates, it's a little spice on the sex life... but never an expectation. If she initiates, great! If she doesn't, it's my job to arouse her consistently, predictably, and reliably according to my needs.

So I learned it was my job to seduce her. Part of that was forcing myself to spend at least 2-3 hours giving her my undivided attention prior to escalating to sex. You can learn some of the art of seduction by doing reading on various "pick-up artist" web sites... but in this case, you're trying to pick up on your wife! It's great fun.

I have a bias. I believe that if men aren't "getting some" enough, it's very rarely the woman's problem. Except in cases of deep sexual problems with the wife, it's the man who needs to learn to step up to the plate and figure out how to seduce his wife over and over again. You gotta make sure to schedule "date night" every week, too, because absent other undivided attention, that's your chance to really pay a lot of attention to each other. Once you have that 4-6 hour time blocked out, the ball is in your court to escalate her into the bedroom.

A few keys:

1. Kino. Can't say enough about this. Put simply, this is the art of touch. Learn to convey your desire through touch without groping her. Leaning very close to talk to her in a crowded restaurant. Sitting beside her rather than across from her at the booth. Putting your hand on her upper thigh while laughing about something together. Google "Kino" for more tips.

Touch reciprocation and "interest touching" is important. If she's interested, she's going to touch you back in some way when you touch her in a non-threatening manner. Watch for her reciprocation before moving to the next step... and the move from a light touch on the hand (think "high-five") to touching more intimate areas is a dance with a thousand moves.

2. Look right at her while you listen to her. It may feel artificial, but keep your eyes laser-locked on hers while she is talking... and then continue to glance right into her eyes for several seconds when you're speaking. Never stare off into space while she's talking, and learn to hang onto every word like they might save your life one day.

3. Footrubs. Backrubs. Hand rubs. Keep lotions nearby to make this easy. Keep your rubbing away from the sexually sensitive areas... you are building comfort and sexual tension, not groping her.

4. Learn to tell stories that involve some innocuous part of her body, like the hands or the face. You don't even have to touch her to do this... just build a story with words and some non-sexual part of her body as the scenery. Hands work really well for this, you can perhaps illustrate a point by asking her to clench her fist and then as you go through the "first, second, third" parts of the story you're telling by gently lifting the finger. Something like that, the possibilities are endless.

5. Learn to be more Alpha Male-ish. Keep your eyes at eye-height or above in public. Take up as much space as physically possible when standing still. Put your hands behind your back rather than in pockets or elsewhere. Don't cross your legs. Speak in a low voice to help people crane their necks toward you to hear you better. This is a whole subject to itself. Skip La Cour has a great series called "Manformation" that talks about alpha male attributes. Alphas are more sexually interesting than betas, and IMHO that's why many women "affair down": that guy may be an unemployed slob, but he's an unemployed slob who exudes Alpha Male-ness.

6. Put a price on yourself. What I mean by this is that if you're begging for sex, she's not going to be turned on by you. Period. You want to bring her the point that she's willing to beg you to make love to her (but don't make her do that!).

Look, there are a whole lot more tips and approaches you can use. I started with just one thing at a time and worked my way into building a repertoire of seduction strategies with my wife. They don't always work, but they do work well above 80% of the time now.

On the plus side, if you really learn how to use seduction strategies to seduce your wife, they'll serve you well if you end up in Plan D, too. Most women don't like to believe these kinds of tactics work. They think that they won't fall for this kind of subtle sexual manipulation. But from my experience using some of these prior to getting married, and on my wife since, many just work. And if they don't work, you can always try out a new tactic.

Thank you everyone for your support. WW went yesterday and had a poly test. She passed the 1st test but failed the 2nd. The first test had to do with NC and # of times she had sex with OM, including our entire relationship since OM had appeared when we were dating. She passed that one. The 2nd was if she was ever with OM when I was traveling and if OM had ever been on our property, can�t remember if it included when she was traveling which she had invited OM with her. She failed that one. The examiner said she was very upset that she had failed so she interviewed her and they retested with �was there physical presence with OM during those times� and she passed. The examiner said that she probably failed it the first time because there was communication during those times. There were a few questions that didn�t get asked because they only do 2 tests a day and only ask 2 questions about the A for each test. The other questions are just general questions. I wish everything could have been answered as I see them all as equally important but I will just have to believe her on the rest. There is a part of me that wonders why she failed the test to begin with but I have not spoken to her. The examiner had her theory but I didn�t talk to WW last night because she just seemed pretty exhausted and down a little, understandably. I didn�t ask her to do this; she did it on her own mainly because she was out of ways to help me believe her. There were just so many lies during the 4 months of trickle-truth between dd1 and dd2 that it has been very hard for me to know what to believe or trust from her. I didn�t go with her, we talked Sunday and she told me the examiner said it might cause her more anxiety if I came so I decided to stay away. She had asked her mother to go with her so I just felt for her that would be the better choice. I have to say that WW has gone above and beyond what I have seen from other WS and it is making a difference. It's is just so devastating.

You have a get out of marriage card courtesy of your WW...you do not have a get out of fatherhood card.