MrWondering...a nice hopeful message - thank you. You have been instrumental in my recovery efforts - from your FIRST POST two minutes after I originally posted - "who is she having an affair with" to now, thank you for sticking with me. I have learned SO SO much and would not be where I am today without this site and good support. As it stands, I have kept my house (no OM living in my house), have 50/50 custody which I believe anything less is ridiculous, have a favorable divorce term and am doing well inside....With a situation such as this, I think I am doing just fine. Six months ago, I was no where close to where I am now - I am recovering ME and that is important. I can only dream that my wife does the same thing and 'comes back.' But at this time, I am peaceful with whatever happens and that is healing.

I don't stick to too many threads anymore. I've kind of gone done the path far enough that I don't tend to get as emotionally involved anymore. Due to that fact, I don't find myself nearly as effective posting to newbies anymore. In fact, I've posted on the recovery and 101 board a bit more in the past few months more than I ever have in years prior. Sometimes I tend to take situations such as yours as personal failures...because I couldn't help you save your marriage as I saved mine. It hurts me for you and I'm glad to see you're appreciative and not bitter about your time here. Fortunately for you...you got to fight for it without negative consequences. Some guys fight and end up losing more than if they'd have just taken the very first wayward off-the-cuff offer (whether such offer was real or not prior to attorneys getting involved is often questionable).

I know you aren't done here...but I'm glad to have met you. I also hope you stick around and give a little payback to the betrayed spouses that come after you. Gotta do something with your time anyway.

Mr. Wondering