|
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178 |
I received a package in the mail this weekend, a gift from ex-girlfriend. I haven�t opened it yet, I�m almost afraid to. What if it�s a bomb? Just kidding! But why is she sending presents to me? I already feel responsible for hurting her; if I open this I�m afraid it will just make it worse. Should I just send it back? Would that be insulting? She sent me a text last week to tell me that she was sending me a gift and she was including something in it for my daughter. Sure enough�here it is. The cold hearted, cynical part of me says that it�s just a way to bait me into dialogue. The warm, fuzzy side says I should open it then call to thank her and explain� I appreciate her thoughtfulness but it�s over between us and she should move on. How should I handle this? Any and all opinions are welcome.
Formerly timetofly.
I thought that a change was in order to start the new year. It was time for me to fly after all.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,345
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 4,345 |
I always believed in cutting off communications with exGFs after breakup... Otherwise, you end up in a never ending cycle of explanations, justfications, guilt, apologies, etc. You were dating, it didn't work out, end of story.
AGG
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,094
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 2,094 |
But why is she sending presents to me? I already feel responsible for hurting her; if I open this I�m afraid it will just make it worse. Should I just send it back? Would that be insulting? ch'ya, sending gifts to an exBF? Boundary issues much? Wow, ttf. This is a tough one. ITA with AGG, but what to do with the gift? You're going to offend her no matter what, right? So I guess you just send it back with a brief note and move on. (or move, lol). Opt
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 656
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 656 |
FWIW, I agree with opt, send the sucker back unopened. Dang though, I'm a curious dude, I'd want to know what was in it just for curiosity's sake.... Maybe you could... nevermind. lol.
Travis
Age - 35 Divorce Final - 3/5/12
S - 13 S - 10 D - 8
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,888
Member
|
Member
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,888 |
Don't think about it another minute. Send it back unopened, with no comment.
Then forget about it as soon as you can.
Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words. St. Francis of Assissi
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178 |
Thanks Guys, I am amazed at the messes I can get myself into!
Formerly timetofly.
I thought that a change was in order to start the new year. It was time for me to fly after all.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,685
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,685 |
Wow, I'm a bit curious too as to what was inside......but that might get you in a deeper mess....
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,463
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,463 |
It would be nice if you could say "I appreciate the thought but we are over and you should be moving on"...however, any attention given her way would feed her. The only way to stop her attention is to return it unopened. Do not respond to her at all. If you do not reward her with attention, whether positive or negative, she will give up.
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,685
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 1,685 |
If all you want is to break up with her completely, then do not contact her, that's the best for you and also for her in the long run. Don't show any signs that you are still interested - that won't be fair for her either.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,463
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,463 |
Wow, I'm a bit curious too as to what was inside......but that might get you in a deeper mess.... Could you steam it open and tell us? LOL Nope, I trust you've already returned it...
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
|
|
|
|
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 178 |
No problems today!! I just want to wish all my friends here a safe and happy Thanksgiving. God Bless!
Formerly timetofly.
I thought that a change was in order to start the new year. It was time for me to fly after all.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
0 members (),
425
guests, and
58
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|