Today is a very sad day for me. I filed and it is killing me. This hurts so much. WH is still in the midst of the affair, he also has an porn addiction and does not acknowledge his addiction. He however lays blame on me and continues to repaint our marriage as completely loveless. It saddens me when he does this.

I do not know how to link my thread from SAA. If anyone knows how let me know.

So sorry kartoread, I know that had to have been hard. As much as it hurts now, it will get better as you distance yourself and your kids from your WH's destructive behavior. Document everything to use in your divorce that way you can set the terms on how everything goes. Again, I'm so very sorry.

Travis

Thank you TC. I have read and keep reading your thread so I know your stich too. It seems like a long road is ahead of me. Thank you, kar

Hi kartoread. I'm now six months past my divorce. I feel for you, because I felt much as you do. I will say that I feel a lot better today!

I would suggest that you go to NO CONTACT with your STBX as much as is possible. The less interaction you have, the better. The same is true with reminders and mementoes. Throw them away, and if that's too hard to do right now, at least put them out of sight.

It's the end of a chapter. It's not the end of your life.

Thank you Fred-
It is hard to see that my life will get better. For now I hope and pray that it will. I am trying to go no contact. I will see how well I can do a plan B and plan D.
kar

kar, this is the place to come when you feel like your head is going to come off and you're going to explode. As far as your STBX is concerned, you don't exist to him, and he to you. Even if you live under the same roof, any contact between the two of you should be kept to an absolute minimum.

If you live apart, try to avoid any reason to have any words with him -- email, telephone, text message or otherwise. if needed, find an intermediary who can pass messages -- of major importance only, not whining and nitpicking -- and if you have kids, try to find someone who can run interference.

This is not harsh, and it's not punitive. It's for your own best mental health!

I have had ZERO contact with my XWW since BEFORE the divorce became final. And it has helped my recovery immeasurably! The folks here at MB have been my sounding board, my crying tree, and my faithful advisors. We can do that for you, too!

Yesterday, I ask STBXWH if I could take the kids out of State to a H2O park with some friends. He said yes. I then asked him to sign a document stating that it was ok for me to do so. He refused. Now I can not take the kids. Oh well. STBXWH thinks his word is good enough. Not! My atty made me sign an agreement stating that I would not take the kids out of state. Oh well, I guess I am in for the long haul on this one. Thank goodness we have H2O parks locally too.