So the hubbies affair is out in the open and he and the OW have been seen around town together (with and without the kids) in stores, playgrounds, etc. My question is... should others who know about the affair approach them and say "what the 2 of you are doing is wrong" or something like that? I would think that would be part of the exposure (or something like that). I read somewhere that this helps to increase the tension between the 2 of them and causes the break down. I know that if enough people tell my WH this, his morals will start to come back and he will start to come around. However, the OW... I don't think she HAS any morals. She can say she is catholic all she wants, go to mass, adn receive communion.... but she shows ZERO remorse for what she has done. My husband seems to have some.....

Thanks!

Are you saying you want to ask others to lecture WH on your behalf?

If they do so, it needs to be of their own volition.
NOT at your request.

You expose the facts.
Then, you allow the consequences come as they may.

Telling others to lecture your WH, Not plan A.
Sorry.

You are separated? Why do you allow your children to go out with him with this woman? Why don't you start by setting limits with him and telling him he may not expose the children to the OW as it is too confusing for them and morally wrong.

Perhaps your friends can apply additional pressure by voicing their opinions. Do you really think this will make him see the light? If he does, will he come back to you? If he comes back, are you willing to take him back?

I have told my husband that he is NOT to take the kids around her. He said there is no court order not allowing him to do so. I set the limits VERY clearly. She is a former close friend (used to live next door). I am looking into a restraining order as well for her. He has visitations with the kids but I can't really say where he can and can't take them. I said if he takes them out of the county, he has to ask permission. My attorney has basically told me there isn't much I can do to keep her from being around my kids unless she starts abusing them. She is alreaddy yelling at my WH in front of the kids, scaring my 5 yr old and causing him to cry and saying he doesn't want to take kids over there any more. If he comes back upset today, I will have to limit it for sure and make him only do visits here I guess, with me here. After all, he is the one who walked out.

Several people have said that they want to go up to him and tell him that it's wrong. End of story. No negotiating. Just making the statement.

He has no morals at this point in time either..... and has been seen kissing her in front of the kids and he's even taken the kids over there and stayed the night at her house. And he stays in her room. I have pointed this out that it is not ok and told him the other day it's inappropriate. If they slept there this weekend, he will no longer have overnights.

Did you print out the articel "Lessons Children learn from infidelity" and give it to your WH?

Gg

I'd make it very difficult for your WH to take kids and let him go to court to fight for visitation rights and you tell judge why. Don't make it easy for WH.

Thanks GG. I did print out the article and it is in an envelope to give to him when drops off the kids in a bit.

I am done playing nice. It's hard ball now. He's messed with my kids heads for too long. He said to me that the kids ask to stay the night there and yet my oldest tells me that he knows that they aren't supposed to stay there overnight!!!