I like yellow roses. However, I can say that I always think of my grandmother when I think of yellow roses. They were her favorite. I would go with deep dark pink. (that is if I didn't despise Hallmark Holidays. ;))

Yes to the single rose. It's just right.

About the color - if she wears a lot of warm colors like rust/brown/cream, then get yellow. If she tends toward cool colors like blue/green/purple get her a pink one. Have the florist put it in one of those little water tubes so it will stay fresh during your date.

Don't do a red rose. It stands for true love and you're not there yet. Besides it's been done too much.

Agreed, no red roses.

The color-matching is interesting, but I think the yellow rose is more on-target in meaning. Here's some info on what the color of roses mean:

Pink and yellow both have a good message, but somehow the yellow seems to make more sense to me.

Just one, huh?

I have to learn to do more research before I spout off.

Here's a slightly different perspective on yellow and pink roses:

• Pink: Happiness, Romance, Admiration, Sweetness
• Yellow: Welcome or Welcome Back, Friendship, Caring, Joy

So, given the colors she wears, perhaps pink is the way to go.

Two, and yellows definition sounds awesome. One for each of you.

If it was me, lol, I woulda got red ones not knowing that the promise was expressed in the yellow ones.

Pink is nice, but i would give that to my Mom, or just a friend.

Lavender and orange are just scary and sound airheaded at this stage, those can wait until infatuation sets in.

and of course, Red is pretty heavy, will take time to get there.

We don't have to discuss white.

Its so cool you have put all this thought into this Fred. I would have those definitions handy at dinner, it should win points.


Edit: now you changed the definitions lol

Give her yellow or pink and tell her what they mean to you, and what she means to you..

There I said it..

"Does a Rose by any other name, still smell as sweet?"

I would go with having the waiter deliver a small box of fine chocolate to the table and tell her it is from you. Have a card inside....

A flower given to me when I am out somewhere is just....a pain. How do I carry it? Where do I put it?

Of course this would be my advise if I didn't despise Valentines Day.

Lol, What is that saying? "I thinketh thou protests to much" I think you secretly like Valentines day.

Your funny SW, every time I see that line, it makes me laugh.

No, I really do despise Valentines Day. However, I ADORE gift giving...of the meaningful variety.

The thought that my husband would buy me something because the rest of the world is doing it--well, doesn't appeal to me at all.

I just can't resist putting my two cents worth in about the gift giving at this stage of Fred's dating.

Yeah I get that completly, its sorta like getting a corporate Christmas card.

The best gifts are the ones you get for seemingly no reason, and shows that someone is thinking of you.

Im just teasin ya of course

Corporate Christmas Card! Exactly!

One of the best gifts I ever got was from my now husband one week after we met. He bought me a Droid! He was LISTENING to me talk about whether I should get one or not. I was SHOCKED and impressed with the gift....

And don't think I don't appreciate it! Given the mistakes I've made in the past with my love life, I'm grateful people are willing to sit in the background and "coach" me. You folks helped me on the SAA forum and you continue to help me here.

I hope I don't come across as needy.

My approach is to be respectful, courteous and polite. I'm not a wimp, but I'm also not one of the "bad boy" types.

What I mean is that I think I already decided that giving her something to recognize Valentine's Day was something I wanted to do. But what?

Perhaps if everyone had responded, "no, don't - it's too early" or "you don't know her well enough" or "it's inappropriate at this stage," I would have listened. I'd have been surprised, but I would have listened.

But most of you have indicated that a gesture of some sort is not only appropriate, but would probably be welcome.

The idea of the chocolate delivered by the waiter is a good one, but it doesn't fit this type of restaurant. I -am- thinking about buying a rose (or roses) in a bud vase, taking it to the restaurant tomorrow and asking them to bring them to the table on Sunday.

At some point maybe I'll tell y'all about the "conversation" I had with myself during a run today about the "bad boy" vs. the "nice guy."

Would LOVE to hear that. Hee hee.

Maybe you shouldn't be takin her to to Checkers then.

Lol sorry teasin goes both ways bro.

I love following this thread, it gives me so much joy watching a brother,(in Christ), recovering back into dating, and also because you are such a thoughtful man Fred, seeing it done so.

The Bad boy thing may be fun for kids, but I laugh at it now. As a matter of fact it sort of a deal breaker if the woman I am with expresses some kind of attraction to "James Dean" types is a seriuos way. OMG it is so funny, but I imagine it fits in with a mans fantasy that everybody want his girlfriend, and he is the Big Dog Alpha Male that nobody can overcome.
..

Go to a martial arts class and get a black belt or break some boards for her, or if you wanna pump it up and be a brooding and troubled man with, "A Past", watch some Twilight episodes..

To me Bad Boy images are all BS. None of us are tough, but thats JMO.

OK, because I have a few minutes, I'll 'ruminate' on the mental conversation I had with myself while running yesterday...

SETTING THE SCENE: I sent a text message to BL asking her if she were free, did she want to go to the restaurant we tried to eat at last weekend. She replied that she had a dance she was going to attend. Then she suggested, "how about lunch, Sunday?" I checked and found out the restaurant was open for Sunday lunch.

SCENARIO 1 (The "bad boy"): Make a reservation for 11:30, text her back and tell her I'll pick her up at 11:00.

I did not do this.

What I did was

Sent her a text, "Sunday lunch served from 11:00 - 2:30. What works for you?"

She replies (she's at work, which is why we're texting), "How about later, 1:30 - 2:00?"

SCENARIO 2 (The "wimp"): Send a reply text asking, "which do you like better, 1:30 or 2:00?"

I did not do this.

What I did was

Made a reservation at the restaurant for 1:30 (hey, if I can get an extra 30 minutes with her, I'm going to!). Sent her a text saying, "we have a reservation for 1:30. I'll pick you up at 1:00."

So, during my run, I was satisfied that I had been decisive enough to make the date but caring enough to let her preferences be considered.

In fact, I was pretty happy that this was POJA in miniature!

Thank God there were no Police around when you were thinking this fred...

I see where yur goin with it though, dominance and control..

You are just doin so awesome..

Fred - you're an inspiration even for me a married man!

Don't anyone stone me!!! I just started asking my wife out on dates over the past 3 months after not giving a damn for 18 yrs :-(

I had almost forgotten what it was to date but I can live vicariously through you and pick up some pointers!

Good on ya Fred!!!

Wow, I'm actually helping someone else??? Isn't that the most amazing thing about this site?

Thanks Powerbane, that was a very nice comment.

Come on Fred ..... how was lunch ???????


And was Pew Girl there this morning ?????/

Ah, SC. Thanks for asking.

I'm still processing, I guess. Which is why I haven't posted an update yet. But since you asked...

First, yes, Pew Lady was there and we said hello to each other. But since I had a lunch date, I left right after service and didn't talk with her further.

So, on to the lunch date.

Saturday evening I had a florist put together a small vase with three yellow roses, a little Baby's Breath and some green fern. I wasn't able to arrange for it to be at the table, so I just took it with me and gave it to her when I arrived at her door.

She surprised me by handing me a box with a red ribbon on it -- she had made some "chocolate raspberry truffle brownies!"

Once again she offered to drive, and I told her that unless she preferred to drive, I was happy to do so, that I actually like driving.

Lunch was terrific! The food was great and made us think about coming back for dinner another night. A very small restaurant, it only seats about 30, so in a way it's a "hidden treasure."

And once again, she reached for her purse when the check came, and I once again refused to accept her offer to share the cost. "This was my suggestion and thus I insist on paying," I told her. We agreed that if she made the date, I'd be willing to let her share the expense.

I dropped her back home afterward. She had said there were things she had to do, and since I couldn't think of any way to extend the date, I had no other choice.

Last night, after I had eaten dinner, I opened the box and ate one of the brownies. Immediately after, I sent her a text message telling her how delicious they were, and thanked her both for the brownies and the date.

This morning she texted a short reply, "YW TY" ("You're welcome, thank you").

The reason I'm still processing is that when we parted yesterday, there was no hug, yet I got the impression that she'd really enjoyed herself. The brownies were a nice touch, and she seemed to like the roses (the arrangement was yellow, green and white, so I told her that in addition to being a "pre-Valentine's Day" offering, they were also Green Bay Packers colors, and she could display them proudly).

So I'm not sure where we are and where things may be headed.

Slow and steady, that's the ticket. I don't want to move too fast, but I also confess that I'm having a hard time getting a feel for how she's feeling.

(Yes, I know, you're going to tell me I should ask her, right? In due time, in due time. I don't feel comfortable going that far, yet).