I am working on it as we speak. The hearing is on Wednesday and is supposed to get hashed out before then.

No, you don't have to communicate directly. By WHAT LAW? What is the LAW on the books that FORCES you to communicate with an abuser? There is not one. It ain't there.

See, your attorney is lazy and is only carrying water for your WS' attorney who is acting on behalf of your WAYWARD. Tell the attorney to move his [censored] and make it clear that you will not be communicating directly with your abusive husband.

Your attorney works for YOU and it is up to you tell him what you want. Your WS is telling his attorney what he expects, so you need to do the same.

nlf, I would get a little more aggressive with this lawyer and tell him what you will or won't accept. Give him your expectations and tell him to get to work. He needs to make that happen.

Never,

It just seems that your WH's attorney is either a dolt or uncrupulous, most probably both! It is apparent that the attorney does not understand the 1st Amendment - free speech! Neither does your attorney, or he is just looking for an easy fee. I am NOT an attorney, but I believe I do understand the vagaries of this principle. Free speech does cover any type of communication. Certain activities can be confined or limited prevented for the safety and protection of others, but I do not believe that communicatin can be forced by any court.

You probably need to get a consult from another attorney on this, and/or research this on the Internet on your own. However, I believe you will find that your H and his attorney are attempting to intimidate and scare you. That is despicable. I would be quite curt and tell your attorney to inform your H's attorney to get laid and get lost! Then, I would write and send a letter to the IL Bar Association requesting them to investigate that attorney's tactics. They WILL have to at least do an initial inquiry/, and he will most likely turn tail and run...maybe even back off from reperesenting your H .

You seem like an honerable woman dealing with a dishonerable guy. Just that you need to arm yourself with some accurate info.


Tom

Thank you everyone for your help. I have a letter I am working on for my attorney. I am trying to be straight forward but polite. I am NOT intimidated by my POSWH or his attorney. If he keeps this crap up, I just may sue for alienation of affection! and, not for monetary reasons, just to prove a g-d point!

It is sad that my attorney who is a former judge is trying to listen to an attorney who is about 30 years younger than him!

nlf, you shouldn't have to lift a finger to defend this. What letter are you working on? Call your attorney and tell him what you require! I do not understand this letter-writing thing you're doing. ??

Well, he doesn't seem to understand my reasoning why I want the IM. So, instead of paying $100 to explain it to him over the phone, I can email it to him and do the same. I told him I wanted it and he said he needs proof why to present to his attorney. So, I am providing the proof. I threw in the stuff that a previous poster put on here about Dr. harley and the effects of the affair. the stinking thing is 3 pages long with all of the reasons why needing an IM is of utmost importance.

Maybe your attorney will learn something for future clients! Good job for insisting, he does work for you after all.

I wonder if my 3 page letter is a little ridiculous. He asked for examples and proof. Well, he is getting it. Maybe law school is calling my name after all.... I am a good arguer. I do remember that WH once said that I was too lawyerish during our marriage....

Go for it!! And good for you for stating your case!

Unbelievable. Waywards are dumb...
letter example...

Dear Mr. Attorney, Thank you for your recent correspondence. Please tell DWH that I am happy to hear that he wants to "communicate" since he stopped communicating when he began his A. He wants to communicate then he needs to be a H filled with remorse and ready to work on his M. When he would like to meet my EN's I would be willing to begin full transparency and communication with him and be part of our wonderful family and be a full time Dad instead of one who wants to pretend.

P.S. I am going to eat a cookie.

Sorry, Illinois is one state I do not know anyone.

Do you, by any chance, know someone who knows someone in IL?

tl

Is this going to be your new thread? I think the old one should merged with this one.

I forgot that Illinois is an alienation of affection state. By all means, I think you should file for this and sue the OW. Don't hesitate to pursue this!

Hello Never,

Your more polite approach to this in terms of a letter stating your postion is probably much better than what I advised. It's good that you are not now wringing your hands over this matter now. It is just that I always have and still get indignant when it appears that someone with specialized training (that does not mean more intellegent or more educated) takes advantage of that training, out of laziness or pure disregard, to attempt to buffalo someone else.

I hope things go well for you in your efforts to protect the integrity and well-being of you and your kids.

Tom

Wahhoooooo!!! Letter from my attorney I received this afternoon: It upsets my client to read his emails filled with unnecessary and sarcastic information. It upsets her to read his email, and she plans to continue the current practice. Until more time passes, it is best for our clients to not have direct contact!

Yahoo

?How do I merge the threads?

I asked about the suit already and my attorney said that it would be wasting my money to do so since rarely a monetary settlement is granted.

Excuse me...... AWARDED.

NLF, click the "Notify" button to the lower right and ask the moderators to merge your threads. Give them the thread titles and tell them under which forum you want them merged.