That's OK. Tell the police department when you ask for the wellness check that you don't have a working contact # and again explain that he has abandoned his W and child and you need a working contact # in case of emergency.

Then give the # to any family/friends that support you, ask them for help to put pressure on him to end the A.

Actually I would do all three. Next, I would also go there and confront him face to face with your son and anyone else who will go with you.

elle, do you think your H thinks of you as a nice passive type and that part of the reason he just disappeared is because he thought you wouldn't fight him on it? I think that's at least part of it and I think it is time you showed him you wouldn't just take this lying down...

elle, a suggestion.

Sometimes it appeases a waywards guilt when they stay connected to their children through text and emails which is a bunch of baloney.

Your son is starved for the little bits that WH is throwing his way.

Another poster I know, her daughter got fed up from hearing from her father through happy birthday texts and general emails.

She felt he was not investing the time to make a phone call to her so she stopped. did not answer texts or emails. WH started getting panicky and he started to call her.

Your WH has no reason to call son because non verbal communication is working. I bet if your son did not respond to any of his messages it will "force" WH to make an effort.

Insanity is keeping doing the same things and expecting different results.

Your son needs to take a stand and not accept the crumbs.

Well, the exposure to the OW children and friends doesn't seem to have worked out. They want to be left out of the situation. And WH is even angrier than he was.

I would LOVE it if he came begging back. But I don't think that will happen...he's so full of hate.

I do alot of things with friends and family. My sons keeps me busy. Because my son has no contact with his father I don't have to share his time...and he's 16 so there isn't much free time for mom. So, I am trying to be as normal as possible. But there are times that I'm lonely because we did everything together and he was my best friend.

Ellegirl, I've asked you and you haven't answered: WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GO TO YOUR HUSBAND'S HOUSE AND CONFRONT HIS LOUSY [censored]?? WHEN??

Ellegirl,

Seriously...how do you know the ow and the kids are angry? Because your WAYWARD husband told you that?

It is a 100 percent given that waywards get angry after exposure, but it's also a 100 percent given that a wayward will lie.

furthemore, if it pissed off the ow, then I'd be THRILLED. Giddy even.

Now get yourself and your sweet 16 year old son OVER to the ow's skank hole and smoke her and your wh out of hiding. I would litter the neighborhood with flyers telling them they are living next to a HORRIBLE HOMEWRECKER or would personally ask for directions, say ever 50 feet for a mile, before I got to their home, so I could EXPOSE the skank ho for what she is.

I'd stop for a coke at the corner convenience store maybe a 1/2 mile from their home and say "hey do you know where OW lives? Her name is X and she broke up my marriage and I'm paying her a visit!"

I'd stop the mailman. I'd ask for directions from maybe ten neighbors' houses to make sure I got the right skank hole address.

Knock Knock. Hello, I'm sorry, I am lost. could you direct me to the home of Skankyho? Oh thank you for that! You mean she's your NEIGHBOR? Oh wow. I'm sorry to tell you this, but I'm going over there because my xh left our family home and my son (that's my son in the car) hasn't seen his father in 8 months. We heard he was living with skankho, and we just wanted to make sure he was actually alive. We're frightened as to what that unstable woman, Ms. Skankho, might do to him. Of course, he could just be shacking up with a homewrecker."

That is EXACTLY what I would do. YOU need to make reality not so fun for her and see him with your own eyes. This needs to go face to face.

You need to break their bubble of reality. This might be the very thing your husband needs. Seriously, any woman who would encourage a man to totally abandon their children is evil and unstable. I'd put NOTHING past a woman like that.

In fact, a few days before I did the face to face, I'd have the police do a well-check, because seriously...something ain't right at the ho's house.

Now go and confront the Skank Ho in her natural ho-bitat! I am trying to get you to laugh a bit so you can step back and see who needs to do what. You need to go there and do a face to face exposure and he needs to know what is going on!

Skank Ho: (definition by urbandictionary)

"A nasty a$$ female who sleeps with anything male for money, drugs, or popularity."
(definition by peachy)"just plain HO."

elle did you go stick you head back in the sand and just "hope it gets better"....

What is going on? Have you investigated this? I worry for your son who is being affected by this every day.

How do you know?
Did you speak to him?

Again, I thought your H was completely off your radar.
What's the truth?

Indeed...

Have you thought of renting a car and going to where he works and following him. Or if you still have keys to your car, getting a cell phone and putting child locator in it hiding it in the car and then you can run it (with volume off) and see where he is exactly?

With that you can do reverse address, get who owns the property a bunch of things.

Listen his anger, mine said when I found out, he said I took everything away from him after I told everyone. You have upset his party. Child locater on a phone hidden in the car, safe, can see everywhere he goes, see his schedule, pattern. Would know if he is around your home, or what or where he is.

I think you should wait this out instead of filing, like don't call or anything see what he does.

Maybe they are playing with you...

He doesn't have access to your bank account does he?

So exposure to OW kids made him angry? Good you want him upset and off balance

Did the PI stuff. Got great pics. Posting on FB.

How are you doing, do you have any results?

Can you give us an update and how is your son?