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Help with marriage
#2487627 03/12/11 08:54 PM
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1
W
wadles
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wadles
Junior Member
W Offline
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 1
i am having an issue. my wife and i are on the fritz and here is my issue: when her and i have a discussion i react to the words she uses and not the emotions behind it
for instance she says she doesn't want to be touched by me physically. i hear the words she doesn't want to be touched but emotionally i know she wants to be. so when i don't touch her because of what she said then she gets hurt and angry. same with she says she doesn't want me around and can't put up withme anymore but then again gets hurt and angry when i move out. I don't understand how to let go of what she is saying and actually hear what she is saying. HELP!!!!
Re: Help with marriage
wadles #2487657 03/12/11 10:45 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,888
Darwin's waiting room
F
Fred_in_VA Offline
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Fred_in_VA
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F Offline
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 2,888
Darwin's waiting room
Hi wadles, welcome to Marriage Builders. Are you folks divorcing? Or are you interested in saving your marriage and building it into a strong, loving, romantic relationship?

If your goal is marital recovery, you might ask the moderators to move this thread (click the 'Notify' button to the lower right) to the Marriage Builders 101 forum. If you're divorcing, then why do you care?

Have you read the Basic Concepts Dr. Harley has developed? This site is all about his principles, so if you want to engage in a healthy discussion about building your marriage, it's time for you to do some reading!

Fortunately, the weekend is upon us, and forum traffic slows up a bit. That will give you plenty of time to get acquainted with Marriage Builders!

P.S. I have some useful links in my signature section, too.

Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
Re: Help with marriage
wadles #2487672 03/13/11 12:26 AM
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 652
M
MyJourney Offline
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MyJourney
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M Offline
Joined: Jan 2011
Posts: 652
Hi Wadles,

Welcome to MB.

Fred asked all the right questions, so if you answer them we can help you better.

There's a lot of great marriage advice in the articles here. Enjoy!

D-yr fall 06-fall 07
Separated 10/2010
Him-several affairs, last one 3/2011
Divorced filed 3/2011, final 3/2012

Formerly "Mopey".
http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2013149&page=1

After a 4 yr FR, it became CLEAR to me of what you can look for in a FR. And that is the absence of POJA, and/or if your spouse tramples on your boundaries. If someone is not willing to do POJA with you, and they don't respect your boundaries, imo, the relationship is doomed.

Moderated by  Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBsurvivor, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours 

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