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Ok just starting this thread here because it seemed appropiate considering the ratio of women to men out there to discuss the odds of meeting someone you can build a relationship with.
It strictly available men versus women first, but we can branch off into different character/history issues also, as this is not just talking about "hooking up", but someone that we have a chance to build something permenent with.
Gotta crunch some numbers on paper and then I will come back with some results.
Post your thoughts at will...
Me 56 Former BS Widowed 5-17-09 --married 25 years. 4 children DS-35 previous marriage--18-22 DGrandSons 6 and 4 Me former BS DD-29 with DGDs 5 and 1yr DSs 26 and 23 Teilhard de Chardin..“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” ...Sounds about right to me.
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Oh Jeez don't hold your breath on my results. This is just some of what I found on the information highway. It still has to be filtered through age, prison population, and who knows what else till I can get down to "available" men and women, (they aren't available if they're in the clink right?) Still More Boys Than Girls Being Born but women outnumber men Still More Boys Than Girls Being Born But women still outnumber men, says Census Bureau----How does that work? Well back to the net.
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Ok year 2000 stats link shows that there are allmost the same amount of women to men alive in the age group of 25 to 44 yrs of age. I know that data is 12 years old, but it burst my bubble that there were more women to men in the population generally speaking. There must be more to this, because I know there are more available women to men IRL out there, so I will continue to research. Population by Age and Sex: 2000 (Brought to you by the CP network..Spamming the forum since you can remember...)
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The problem with your assumption (if I may call it such), CP, is that ratios don't matter.
Dating and mating is a woman's game. It's always the woman who decides with whom she's going to go out, with whom she's going to marry, with whom she's going to have children.
Even if you had 20 women and one man, if that man were drawn to only one woman and she felt nothing for him, that would be the end of the story.
Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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Here are the stats from the census bureau for 2010 and the ratio is still 96.7 men to every 100 women at the median age of 37.. Population 2010 Ok onto the prison population to see what I can find in numbers there.. Better yet givin a break till tommorow cuz the stats are hard to find ATM
Last edited by ConstantProcess; 06/07/11 09:48 PM.
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Even if you had 20 women and one man, if that man were drawn to only one woman and she felt nothing for him, that would be the end of the story. But isn't the reverse true as well? If you had 20 men and one woman, and the woman was drawn to one man who felt nothing for her, that would be the end of the story, right?
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When you're trying to figure out the odds of meeting someone good, you need to look at more than just the statistics in your country. What are the odds in your city? Or your social circles?
For instance, my city has a much greater female to male population than the average. If I spend all my time working in an all-female office, go to a ladies Sunday School class, join a scrapbooking group, and there are no eligible men on my street, then the chances of meeting someone are slim.
If I move to a city with more men than women, take a job where most of my co-workers are male, and get involved in activities that are popular with men, I'm much more likely to meet someone.
Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
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Dating and mating is a woman's game. It's always the woman who decides with whom she's going to go out, with whom she's going to marry, with whom she's going to have children. I disagree. You make it sound like men have no options, like they are passive entities waiting for a woman to come around and make his life happen. It takes two people for dating and marriage to happen. I agree that women have a bit more control over having children. But it still takes both a man and a woman to have a baby.
Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
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Granted, in the animal kingdom, 90% of the time it is ALL ABOUT the female's choice.
Sometimes it works for humans, but with us, it's more like both sides are flashing feathers and butting heads and building neat little nests.
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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My odds aren't too good being that I don't date and right now I'm home looking for work on line.
Fred, I have to disagree...from what I see of the age 50 and older group, it seems to be men that have the buyer's market, although if any of us really wants someone in our life, it's up to us to make it happen.
Enacting life's lessons into positive change... .
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I guess as with so many things, KR, it's a matter of perspective (also known as "the grass is greener on the other side...") 
Preach the Gospel every day. When necessary, use words.
St. Francis of Assissi
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This is interesting, I'll have to keep an eye on this thread. I was looking up info online last night trying to find the rate of divorce when one spouse is disabled, and came across a link somewhere, not sure if I want to wade into my history folder to try to find which of a few hundred links it was..  that basically stated in the over 50 range, men with financial resourses (those who the wives leave them with something I guess?) can and do remarry quickly. Reason was supposedly that men don't like to be alone, women would rather be alone than married at this age, provided they have the financial backing to have a decent life. You have MUCH higher odds than me, and I've not totally given up hope. That should be a good sign for you!
I am 52, stbxh is 46
One child together 15 DD
2 (mine) from 1st marriage, 26 dd and 28 ds.
Married Dec 94
Separated Oct 09
Too many D-Days to list. (EA/Cyber affairs)
He filed no fault 3-2011 I countered with grounds.
Court date set for June 6, 2011 for Final Decree and was continued.
That ticked him off, he is now fighting for custody.
Lawyers are expensive, my daughter is worth every penny.
Even the ones I have to borrow.
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basically stated in the over 50 range, men with financial resourses (those who the wives leave them with something I guess?) can and do remarry quickly.
Reason was supposedly that men don't like to be alone, women would rather be alone than married at this age, provided they have the financial backing to have a decent life. Did it say anything about women over 50 with decent financial resources? Or do those women just forget about it because they're done with men?
Me: BS 51
Himself: WH 53, EA/PA w/ RunnerSlut his "running buddy."
Buncha' kids. The two youngest are still minors.
Separated: 08/13/09 after 25 years of marriage
Plan D: Filed 11/13/09 Final 3/30/11
MC told me that he probably has a personality disorder
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Kirby, basically it said those women have lives too good to give up because they are self sufficient. Meaning they find things to do, and aren't as lonely in general. Granted, I rephrased that, I'll see if I can't hunt up the link tonight.
(I saw your comment last night as well on the other post, I'm glad it helped in whatever way it did!)
I really need to update my post. I think you will enjoy the new read!
I am 52, stbxh is 46
One child together 15 DD
2 (mine) from 1st marriage, 26 dd and 28 ds.
Married Dec 94
Separated Oct 09
Too many D-Days to list. (EA/Cyber affairs)
He filed no fault 3-2011 I countered with grounds.
Court date set for June 6, 2011 for Final Decree and was continued.
That ticked him off, he is now fighting for custody.
Lawyers are expensive, my daughter is worth every penny.
Even the ones I have to borrow.
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Well, that was almost too easy to find.... here's the part I was talking about, the whole article is good! Men worry that they won't be able to find love again, but McGee said it tends to be easier for men than for women.
"They think, if she left me, nobody's going to want me," McGee said. "What they don't realize is how easy it's going to be for them. If they have any financial resources, they can get another woman at the snap of a finger."
Schwartz, who is 65 and divorced, agreed that men may have an easier time finding a mate than women because she believes women do better on their own. In 2008, Schwartz published a book through Hyperion Press called "Prime: Adventures and Advice about Sex, Love and the Sensual Years."
"I think men believe it's either a woman or the abyss," Schwartz said. "Women say, 'I've got my friends, I go to the theater. I don't know if I want to be married again." Read more: Gray divorce brings blues Its sad to say that there are women out there who are only looking for the money, but it's true. That's one thing I can say I'm not looking for, and my financial resources are going to be downright foul after my daughter turns 18, and to me? That's STILL financial freedom, something I am not going to give up lightly in the future. I doubt I'll barely break past poverty, and that's good enough for me.
I am 52, stbxh is 46
One child together 15 DD
2 (mine) from 1st marriage, 26 dd and 28 ds.
Married Dec 94
Separated Oct 09
Too many D-Days to list. (EA/Cyber affairs)
He filed no fault 3-2011 I countered with grounds.
Court date set for June 6, 2011 for Final Decree and was continued.
That ticked him off, he is now fighting for custody.
Lawyers are expensive, my daughter is worth every penny.
Even the ones I have to borrow.
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I've heard there is a much higher proportion of men to women in Alaska. But, I've heard this about dating men there:
'The odds are good, but the goods are odd'
Me DH 39 WW 45 EA/PA LTR DD2 6 yrs old Divorced 2000
Cypress I believe God challenges us with every crisis. Its more than just choosing good over evil, we have to learn and grow along the way.
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The odds don't really matter, if you are the "right" person. And you have to believe that you are the right person, because it comes across in your body language and the energy that you convey. Men (and women) want to be with people who have high self-esteem and confident - not someone needy who wonders whether anyone would want them.
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At the strong encouragement of a friend, I looked at an internet dating site. I found that most men my age want a woman:
5 to 25 years younger
slender, fit and toned
employed and making 75-100+ grand annually
sexually attractive to them
free to travel and explore the world/life
be a passionate lover
One mentioned marriage, all else want a "companion", "soul mate", FWB, etc.
For someone who doesn't believe in sex outside of marriage, Finding a "good" man who believes as I and willing to develop a relationship with celibacy to marriage appears to be.... "zip".
BS -me 69 WS - him 68
Married 40 years
OW - "daughter" added to family 1/05 for "Fathering healing" - 26 years younger
EA 1/05 - 12/07 PA 8/07 - 12/07
NC 1/08
DDay March 30, 2008
Separation Feb. 17, 2010 two days before our 33 anniversary
DDs 31, 25
WH served me for divorce Sept. 18, 2014
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I found most of those websites to attract a set of people who didn't really want to have to put much thought into finding a mate. Just read a few profiles and "bam" there they are!
In fact, I guess I was being a little lazy myself when I looked at them; I just wanted to post a profile and have an angel fall into my lap. I met one there who had us moving in together after 2 or 3 dates.
The woman I'm dating now I met at a company Christmas party (she works in another department, so we just knew OF each other, which did help).
I also met a real nice lady volunteering on Thanksgiving last year. I recommend volunteering to singles, because in the chance you don't meet someone, you're still doing something that has been proven to add years onto your life!
opt
Me: 43 y.o. BFWH, D-day 11/11/09 (NC since 9/01) Divorce from WW final 9/16/10. Current Status: MB-based Marriage to Nature Girl 12/8/12 (first date on 12/11/10) Mine: S(16), D(11) NatureGirls: S(23), D(21) Another EA Story
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You make it sound like men have no options, like they are passive entities waiting for a woman to come around and make his life happen. LOL.....options?.......Since I exposed my WW and her Affair.....I've had tons of friends, co-workers, and others trying to fix me up. I have refused more offers due to my own need to process and become healthy. I have options.....I just don't choose to act on them right now. 55 years old......6'4".....220 lbs.....intelligent......well spoken......options.....yep! It takes two people for dating and marriage to happen. I agree that women have a bit more control over having children. But it still takes both a man and a woman to have a baby. Don't want no babies!!!
BH(Me)= 55 WW(Her)=43 DD=24 (My step-daughter, been raising her since the age of 8, SHE'S MY DAUGHTER!!) Married=13 yrs Together=16.5 yrs THIS IS MY STORYWW moved out of the home = May 1,2011 D-Day=July 4, 2011 Dear Wife: I'm COMPLETELY CRAZY about you!..... as of Aug-2012 forget that last part....Good Luck to you and GOODBYE!!"Mourn the woman she was. Know the woman she is."
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