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I find it amazing that WSs continuously blame their affair on the phases of the moon, the alignment of the stars, the weather, the AP, the state of the marriage, their friends, their bad upbringing, stressful jobs - and not to forget, obviously the betrayed spouse HAS to be to blame.
What these excuses boil down to is
'Its all about me'
'When things happen to me, I deserve to behave badly and then face no consequences"
While they tell the story of how they are affected by all and sundry, they curiously omit any info as to the effect they had on others.
Strange.
So all, what's your best 'All about me' quotes?
To get us started, my h said:
"What about me, I face losing a lovely home and a lovely wife"
but forgot to say
"by shagging lovely wife's friend"
He also said:
"I am the one who lost my best mate - you dont even care that he died"
correction - What I actually minded was that he was sleeping with said friends widow.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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This is a great thread topic... but where do I get started on my WH?  How about these: "Imagine how I feel, everyone is judging me for leaving you" "All I keep hearing is how great you are, how I should commit to our marriage. I'm sick of it!" "Why is everyone gossiping about me?" (said after he started "dating" OW 2 weeks after discussing reconciliation with me) "I tried everything to save our marriage!" Mmmm, by not telling me he was unhappy, by not reading a book, by not attending counselling... in what way exactly did he try? I actually had to ask, did you try what I have tried in past few weeks... confused look on foggy's face... But thats right, he tried an affair!
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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My WW's personal and perennial favorite - 'How could you send that letter? If you only wouldn't have sent that letter.' Implying of course, that we would be 'together' now and in counseling. That's her spiel for everything - it's all MY fault. She's the victim of the letter. LOL
Hmmm....let's see, the letter was sent because you refused to stop the affair. I actually gave her two bites at that apple. That leads me to a personal favorite - 'I did stop - both times!' Huh?
It's all about her - even though she claims she's putting DS first. Yeah, how is he best served by a D without even an attempt at recovery? Oh yeah, that's right, it's really not about him; is it?
BS(me)- 45
WW - 41
D-day 1 - (PA) 01/2011
DS - 6
Exposure: early 02/2011
Started Plan B - 7/11
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"I'm in pain to ya know!" 
me: bw, 50
he: wh, 51
m: 1990
sep: 2007
dd: 18
ds: 14
dd: 11
multiple affairs: two with past gf's, one email dalliance.
Too many d-days to count. First one 2/06. After all this time, it's still my fault.
I've had enough. Divorce in progress.
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"Imagine how I feel, everyone is judging me for leaving you" The poor bunny! I am beginning to get a bit scared Caracal, that my WH and yours are exactly the same person. Thank goodness the geography rules that out! mine said the same along these lines "My name has been dragged through the mud by you, on a day when it shouldn't have" (His late friend's birthday)Then said: "OW shouldnt have had to put up with this on the anniversary of her husband's b'day" I didnt respond, but if I had: "Funny I thought that YOU dragged your own name through the mud by shagging your mates widow, being in her company everywhere and holding her hand in public like a pair of foggy dimwits Paused for breath, then "If you and she are recovered enough from your 'grief' to text each other in the small hours of his birthday, then you can cope with the fall out".
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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[quote=AndyM] 'I did stop - both times!' Huh? quote] 
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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I am beginning to get a bit scared Caracal, that my WH and yours are exactly the same person. Thank goodness the geography rules that out! Indie, not sure of your location, but my WH is in UK!!! If not one and the same, maybe its contagious?  An invasion of the waywards... much worse then any shaun of the dead!
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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And here is another one... "What, you think I can sleep easy at night?" Hope not, and hope it is guilt and thoughts of me keeping him up rather then little miss skank! 
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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These all sound like my xww. Its amazing that its so much like a disease that they all get because the systems and problems are always the same. My WW was and is extremely bitter with no remorse. i have not had any comments from her about ever getting back together tho. I think mine checked out for good and i think now that its for the best.
Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
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A lovely one from Plonker:
If you could have just accepted her (and my need to eat cake) I would have loved you soooo much.....
You have friends........why can't I have friends?
(Cos I don't shag my friends and have secrets maybe??)
Me 50
WH 52
WH in A 6 yrs in total, last 5 yrs JGF (Not!)
DD final 1.12.10
NC letter sent 3.12.10
Working at being the best I can be, the rest is up to you.
He is still a plonker, but he is my plonker!
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A lovely one from Plonker:
If you could have just accepted her (and my need to eat cake) I would have loved you soooo much.....
You have friends........why can't I have friends? 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Caracal - Your WH and mine had almost identical words.
Amazing how these affairs and the reasons for divorce are all the same for waywards worldwide!!!
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And here is another one... "What, you think I can sleep easy at night?" Yup, I got that one, closely followed by: I feel like I have failed!!!! In this instance you can trust you feelings softlad...
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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"I have lost my clients and some big accounts because you exposed to the clients. You played on the fact these were conservative people and wouldn't like an affair. Why do YOU play dirty, Peachy?"
I loved that one.
I exposed to some of his biggest clients and it was ME who was the one being dirty.
Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right. ~Jane Goodall
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Caracal - Your WH and mine had almost identical words.
Amazing how these affairs and the reasons for divorce are all the same for waywards worldwide!!! Defintiely ITL, so MB is great for us BS (and the occasional remorseful FWS) to unite. These threads are also a breath of fresh air to me whilst in Plan B, reminding me of why I don't want to have contact with WH... who needs to hear this rubbish, better to just have a giggle with hindsight!
Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.
Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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When I told her parents of her latest outright lie:
Ex-WW: It's hard enough around here without you sending secret emails to my family and assassinating my character.
BH(Me)=40
WXW=38
ILYBNILWY: 8/09
DDAY: 8/31/09
Two boys: 8,7
Divorced 3/23/2011
Don't let your eyes refuse to see. Don't let your ears refuse to hear. Or you ain't never gonna shake this sense of sadness. --Ray Lamontagne
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In the early days after I busted now WXH I was trying to get him to move out because what he had done was so hard on me that I needed time away from him. He said, 'It has been hard on all of us, Smiling Woman.' And then something about what had 'happened'.
I said, "Tornados 'happen'. Your affair didn't 'happen'. You HAD sex with your adultery partner. It didn't just 'happen'."
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When I told her parents of her latest outright lie:
Ex-WW: It's hard enough around here without you sending secret emails to my family and assassinating my character. 'secret emails' 'assassinating' - does she think shes a spy?
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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"I have lost my clients and some big accounts because you exposed to the clients. You played on the fact these were conservative people and wouldn't like an affair. Why do YOU play dirty, Peachy?"
I loved that one.
I exposed to some of his biggest clients and it was ME who was the one being dirty. Oh my god, just when I think Ive heard Darth's funniest, you come out with a new one, Peach.
What would you do if you were not afraid?
"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.
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From my WW:
"We can't get back together......since you exposed it to everyone we know, I won't know who is looking at me or for what reason!"
Or.....the even better one:
"You hurt me by telling everyone!"
Last edited by BillCarolina; 08/22/11 06:06 PM.
BH(Me)= 55 WW(Her)=43 DD=24 (My step-daughter, been raising her since the age of 8, SHE'S MY DAUGHTER!!) Married=13 yrs Together=16.5 yrs THIS IS MY STORYWW moved out of the home = May 1,2011 D-Day=July 4, 2011 Dear Wife: I'm COMPLETELY CRAZY about you!..... as of Aug-2012 forget that last part....Good Luck to you and GOODBYE!!"Mourn the woman she was. Know the woman she is."
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