Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 49 of 89 1 2 47 48 49 50 51 88 89
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
ConstantProcess,

Not sure. Is there anything you want to mention?

ROFL

AM


BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Well, when someone encourages their WS to LIE to their employer, you could see how lying to little ol us isn't gonna make their alarm bells go off.

There is only so much that someone can help someone whom is not even ready to help themselves.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
Dr. Harley talks about the different types of liars: trying to look good liars, avoid trouble liars, protective liars, and born liars. The first three are bad habits that can be changed if a person wants to change. The last type of liar rarely changes. This type of liar will continue to tell you they had ham sandwich for lunch when it really was a hamburger.

Most betrayed spouses are acutely sensitive to dishonesty.

AM


BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
It's because we are "bitter" doncha know? HAHAHAHA


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 835
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 835
Wha? Was just a little omitted detail, no? I mean, every PAINFULLY GRAPHIC detail doesn't need to be shared, right?

bahahahahaaaaaa! (Sorry, couldn't resist!!)

Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 2,589
Ummmmm, how many waywards have you met/heard of that want to share details?

Ummmmm, none. Might get tripped up. Might actually have to be open and honest. How terrible that would be!

Now, there is such a thing as TMI. And sometimes that happens too.

AM


BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
I like Samuel Clemens,Mark Twains philosophy,
"If you don't lie you never have to remember anything"

Think about it, but if you have to think too long, go out and hit yourselfin the head with a twobyfour, then thank yourself

Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 835
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2010
Posts: 835
So very Judge Judy.

"Don't look down, look right here!"
"If it doesn't make sense, it's usually a lie, sir!"
"People don't have to THINK about the truth, madam!"

Mark Twain/SC and Judge Judy in the same sentence.

(I do have a job, BTW. LOL!)


Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 393
I cannot stand my EX WW. She just feels like she can run over me with her crap when she wants and gets so upset when i dont let her lol. Now my divorce is final and i know longer try to keep the peace when she thinks shes gonna have her way. It infuriates her and brings me a little happiness. She is living in her own little world still. rant over thanks for listening lol.


Me 37
WW 37
Married 14 years
4 boys 10,8,6,3
exposure Day 2/18/11
A started 11/2010
Divorced 7/21/2011
Has it been a year already??
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,686
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,686
How about the ever dependable--

"Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining!"


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818
Likes: 7
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 15,818
Likes: 7
Waywards who not only didn't follow the advice here, but don't even look here when they know their betrayed spouse is posting here.

twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour twoxfour

You were given a golden opportunity and you blew it. Why?


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 561
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 561
I liken my EX WW's affair to an abscessed tooth. It's the source of all her pain.

Yet instead of removing the abscess, she's removed all the good healthy things around it... our family, our home, our retirement, our credit, our savings, our children's chance of growing up in an unbroken family.

And she still clings to the abscess denying anything is wrong, despite the fact that the rest of her family can clearly see it IS rotten.

Last edited by TryingEverything; 08/12/11 12:45 PM.

BH(Me)=40
WXW=38
ILYBNILWY: 8/09
DDAY: 8/31/09
Two boys: 8,7
Divorced 3/23/2011

Don't let your eyes refuse to see. Don't let your ears refuse to hear. Or you ain't never gonna shake this sense of sadness. --Ray Lamontagne
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,786
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,786
Yes TE - I feel the same way about WH. He is the bobbin that is floating in the septic system. His friends and OW(the crap) keep tugging at him and are starting to pull him under. I am the filter that is trying to get him to clean water, but he refuses to cut lose the fishing line that has him forever floating in the crap.

I am not sure if it is a man thing - but Plan B is really awesome. I strongly encourage you to do that with WXW and see what happens.

What is your plan? Are you going to move on?

If not then Plan B for another year to really see if this affair dies. If it doesn't then you have become healthy enough to start dating and you will never look back.

My .02 cents ...

Last edited by itistoughlove; 08/12/11 11:37 AM.
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Why is it that some posters bring up the fact that no one has commented on their thread posts, and then start attacking and saying that it's too "clicky" here? Really? Am I in the "click" or out of it? I didn't even know there was a click, so I must be out of it. And then MY NAME gets posted as a BS who has been posting for a WHILE(less than 2 years I might add) and that people still post to me. I posted something YESTERDAY, just a comment and had *2* people post something to me about it. TWO. Am I glad that those two people took the time to post something, yeppers I am. But if NO ONE had posted anything, I wouldn't have minded. There are people BLEEDING on these boards. I just update with things that are a part of my journey. It is almost like a diary that others also get to read.

I was very upset that my name was brought up like that. I AM working MB. I have been working MB. I don't post on my own thread often, only to write something to keep people up to date with things, and know that I am still doing a stellar Plan B. I feel almost like I am WRONG for posting here, and I felt attacked, by being singled out. I feel like I have advice to offer, and I help whenever I can. I don't know how or why my name would come up when talking about "clicks" on MB as I didn't even know that there were any.

If you post something, and no one responds, it is simply because the people who read it didn't know what to tell you. Maybe they were worried that they would screw it up more(I mean, there are REAL people on the other side of those words), or maybe they just aren't confident in their own thoughts. Don't take things so personally. It isn't often about YOU anyways.

There, all BETTER grin


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
I am in the Click....NUH-huh!!! Lol

Had to comment Scotty....

Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Ive only been here two months and the traffic has already slowed q dramatically on my thread.

Why? Because I am not bleeding on the floor anymore.. That is how it should be when so many people are hurting

In fact I am posting on the other people's threads with what limited experience I can offer - paying it forward.

I even make the odd joke.

Darn, I must be in the click too.



What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
So after that sunk in..hehe

Some do not stay here long, on this forum, sort of like they feel like if they ignore the problem, it will go away. They want a quick fix and when they get it, they are gone. Its OK, thats good too, if the problem is really fixed.

Just the nature of the condition people ussually come here also points to there impatience and why.

You reminded me of a joke that popped into my head today, as one of my favorite comforting sayings in life.

"I wouldn't want to join any club that would have me as a member"---Groucho Marx

Stop complaining Scotty, your one of the vets, you aren't allowed to have problems, you meanie!


But my rant would have to be that people don't do something, anything, besides sit around and suffer. I know it feels like a snails pace, but it is something in the right direction.

Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 289
B
Member
Offline
Member
B
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 289
I have nothing to rant about regarding this board or the people on this board! (I'm referring to the experienced veterans)

The experience on this board has been an UNBELIEVABLE EDUCATION to me regarding Marriage and relationships!!!

My primary rant is directed toward my WW who vilifies me for EVERYTHING except the VietNam War!
It's a darn good thing that I'm COMPLETELY CRAZY about you or I'd just leave you to your "Crazy Alien Life" and let you fall on your face!

My secondary rant is directed toward the scum-sucking PIG (the OM) who took the opportunity to trifle with HIS OWN MARRIAGE AND FAMILY as well as MINE!
How did you like it when you and I stood nose to nose? Were you worried? I sure hope so!
How did you like it when your Wife and Family were alerted to your scum-suckyness?
Were you worried? I sure hope so! May you get full value from your error!!!

My third rant is directed to my WW's "Friends"...who encouraged and supported the affair.....be aware, we know you're NOT her "Friends".

I feel better already!


Last edited by BillCarolina; 08/30/11 07:24 PM.

BH(Me)= 55
WW(Her)=43
DD=24 (My step-daughter, been raising her since the age of 8, SHE'S MY DAUGHTER!!)
Married=13 yrs
Together=16.5 yrs
THIS IS MY STORY
WW moved out of the home = May 1,2011
D-Day=July 4, 2011
Dear Wife: I'm COMPLETELY CRAZY about you!.....as of Aug-2012 forget that last part....Good Luck to you and GOODBYE!!
"Mourn the woman she was. Know the woman she is."
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,786
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2011
Posts: 3,786
The issue Scotty is you can see the red flags of her marriage all over the place. Nobody wants a pizzing contest. It is frustrating when someone spends so much time here, yet you see the marriage sinking on the Titanic.

I actually enjoyed the comments because it reminds me of what I would have if I took WH back today. I don't want to be that person anymore. I used to be able to fly off the handle like that - every little thing got under my skin.

Today - I try to learn from those people and those moments. It is hard to write to someone when you know they aren't using the comments to really grow.

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Oh Bill, don't worry, MY WH has blamed YOU for the vietnam war. It has to be someone else's fault of course. MrRollieEyes

I could have written that same rant shortly after arriving, but now, uh, I don't care to. Only hold onto that anger as long as it shoots you forward in the RIGHT direction, and then, learn from it, and change it into something useful FOR YOU and YOUR plans.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Page 49 of 89 1 2 47 48 49 50 51 88 89

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 215 guests, and 66 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Gastelumattorney, lucasmiller, Demonolatry, Jose E. Martin, Frank Pro
71,895 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Strengthening Relationships Through Better Communi
by lucasmiller - 11/13/24 04:55 AM
Really Struggling
by Demonolatry - 11/13/24 03:52 AM
20 appointments and $1000’s later…
by IrishGreen - 10/30/24 06:20 PM
Happening again
by jah - 10/29/24 10:00 AM
I grounded my wife - am I proceeding correctly?
by Mature - 10/27/24 02:05 PM
Children
by BrainHurts - 10/19/24 03:02 PM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,616
Posts2,323,460
Members71,895
Most Online3,185
Jan 27th, 2020
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2024, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5