We have confirmed with MrsVanilla that this is a match.

Cross-posted w/ Fireproof.

So... Mr Vanilla is posting here on the down-lo, or... someone in town on the same subnet, or.... one spouse posting as the bs and ws?

erp a herrrp a derp....

Upon further confirmation from Fireproof, "MikeX" is, apparently, "Mr. Vanilla."

If veracity is in doubt, as I understand it can be, I'm sure the mods could verify that somehow. I am at school studying, Mr. X (a composite, since it appears he does not want to be identified as Mr. Vanilla) is at work, networks are Y and Z, etc.

All right, time out. I have a "mutual friend" that just emailed me whom I need to deal with. A "mutual friend" who has a history of doing this. Misguided as it may be. I don't know yet if my DH knows or not that the "mutual friend" did this.

I'll be interested to hear how this "mutual friend" managed to pull this off. And why.

MrsVanilla, that is very possible if this friend posted from your home yesterday. The initial IP match orginated from your home.

Are you wireless systems on protect? Someone may be hijacking some bandwidth from your wireless system from the neighborhood or the local Starbucks depending on what network you are posting from.

In order to get on a marriage website that she frequents and post, coincidentally enough, TO her?

Unless I'm missing something, that one doesn't pass the smell test.

All right. I spoke w/ DH, and I think I have the story now.

Apparently this friend is in town, and he stopped by our apartment yesterday while the kids and I were out of town. A while ago he had asked for DH's info to log on, as the friend was "having some trouble" doing it on his own. So the friend has log-in information that is DH's, and he logs on yesterday using our home wireless network while he and DH are visiting.

Also apparently he is still in the area today, and happens to be using a server that is my husband's work server - this part I am still unsure of as to how that's possible.

The friend asked that I not be informed of his visit, and DH also did not share with me that he gave the friend the login info. I jumped to the conclusion, (a natural one, I think, given the evidence), that DH was involved in all of this - either posting directly or indirectly via the friend.

I was quite certain prior to this that those saying MikeX was my DH were utterly wrong - that DH would never do that, that the level of openness and honesty and the relationship we have would preclude any sorts of deceitful dealings like that.

And I was right, DH was not aware of the friend posting or knowing what the friend posted - he didn't really question giving the friend the info, and this all just snowballed. (Because I am dramatic, says me.)

I think many of you will probably suspect this, and I am about to deliver a line by many a new, pre-D-day, unknowing BS: I know my DH, and I believe him when I spoke w/ him about all of this.

Ugh, sorry for my contributions to the drama. I was thrown for a bit there.

Mrs V,

so your friend has been posting for 4 months as your H? Using your husband's info, your home address and his work server?

I think it's only the posting from yesterday and today that are server-ID'd. The ones prior to that SHOULD (although, clearly, at this point, I am not the one of those in the know) be from farther away - at least out of state, if not out of country.

I'm sure the mods can confirm that, as well.

Why did the friend post as your H?

Why did he take the risk of doing so from your house yesterday, if he wanted to keep this a secret from your H?

Why did he post as your H earlier this year? Was he using those servers the previous times he posted?

This makes no sense at all, but if you are happy with the explanation, so be it, but I think he emailed his friend and begged him to cover for him.

It is a long-time friend of my DH's - they grew up together, share a lot of history, etc. It's very easy for him to know or obtain DH's info, and wants to help DH in any way he can - maybe in ways he thinks help but really don't.

He has been helpful in the past, especially prior to MB/some form of recovery when I was a terrible communicator and poorly introspective at best. It's just that this stunt, now, was... Well, not helpful for me, at least, but maybe it was for him to help DH, or helpful directly to DH upon reading...I don't know. It's done now.

MrsVanilla, we did check and they are not farther away. They are the same IPs we see now from the same city.

I don't know which of these to go with right now:

How about

or

?

Better than

or

Mrs. V, think about what you've written. Does that explanation sound plausible to you at all??

I'm thinking this is a good one (for Mr. V)