OMG....My husband changed the locks on our home when we didn't even have a seperation agreement. Most all of belongings are in there - I just am camping out because of his treats and hostility. I went there this morning with the police and a locksmith and the locksmith had to break in because she wouldn't answer. That is when I discovered all my stuff packed, all my personal papers, bank statements and that kind of stuff gone. Don't know what she has gone through but she is living there with even her dog like the home is hers. I don't even have a coat where I am at now and I cannot find anything. He left me a message telling me he didn't appreciate what I did, and threatened to have me arrested if I came there again. Any advise? My lawyer hasn't answered yet and want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this or can offer anything.

Take the advice sugarcane gave you. Are you not on the deed to the home?

Are you on the deed or lease to this house? What grounds would he have to have you arrested??

Did you tell that nasty skank to get out of your house? Did you stay there? Plop down on the couch and settle in?

I am out here trying to get some help and support. I did not move out, I'm camping out to get away from the hostility and cruelness. I would love to just go marching back. But, his girl called him home from work and to keep from a fight, I left with pictures of it all. He cannot have me arrested I don't believe because I am on the deed, and, we don't have a seperation agreement. This woman is going through all my mail and personal belongings. I don't have a key. He is refinancing the home and I refuse to sign and he loses his lockin next week, and, he is threatening to destroy my stuff if that happens. He doesn't want to give me what he owes me. It is a very hard situation to have to be scared like this and I'm just trying so hard to get some understanding.

BeepBeep, you need to get an attorney post-haste. Today. Now.

Correct, he cannot have you arrested if you are an owner of the property.

A crime is being committed against you. You are being deprived of your own home. I would tell you to go to the police, but I suspect they'll tell you to get an attorney because it's a domestic issue.

Lawyer up.

Don't panic. The law is on your side. If that is your home, then you have a right to be there. You also can file restraining orders if you feel threatened.

Anything he destroys will be used against him in the divorce if it comes to that.

If the OW shows up at your house while you're in there, then you can call the police on her. She's not a legal resident in there and is trespassing.

But you need to stop panicking, get your lawyer involved, and stop being afraid. Go forth with the confidence that he's shooting himself in the foot.

He can't legally change the locks on the house and deny you a key. You're a co-owner.

Yes, I'm on the deed. He has moved this woman into my home. Her clothes are hanging in the bedroom closet. My close were all upstairs so my husband could use the whole downstairs. She has packed up all my clothes, bank statements, important documents and everything. She is living there as well as her dog. The police said I have every right to be there and they let her know that. But, because my husband invited her to be there, they said she also has a right to be there. This is a horrible pissing contest. I know the law is on my side. If I get a restraining order against him, I just wonder if I go back to the house to stay if that will force him to leave.

As OP has found out from the police, OW is not trespassing because WH, the legal co-owner, invited her to the property.

So what are you doing now, beepbeep? You appear to have left thouse again "to keep from a fight".

Leaving is a strategic mistake. You can describe is as "camping out" all you like, but you abandoned your home leaving the door wide open for OW to move in. The only way to recalim the right to live there is to go and live there.

There is no need to fight with anyone. If anyone starts a fight with you, call the police. Move back into your home and into your bedroom. Do not allow WH and OW to carry on their affair in your house unimpeded.

Have you heard from your lawyer yet?

Where is your child? (Edited to add: I see she is in her 20s. Where does she live?)

Problem if I go back, and, they won't leave, I am afraid to go to sleep. It isn't safe. That why I had the Police escort me when I went in this morning with my camera. Our daughter was aware of my belongings being tampered with and didn't tell me. That really hurt. I can't imagine my father doing that to my mother, then, me not let her know she should go check on things. That is all my daughter had to tell me. My lawyers office did get back with me and told me there was basically nothing I could do but move back, but, I shouldn't do that if it wasn't safe. It is not safe, and, that is the reason I camped out because he refused to pay the mortgage and etc and I didn't have the money. I just wonder about this woman going through my personal belongings that include personal in nature mail. I would really like to know if a similar situation has happened to anyone. I know I was advised here not to leave, but, it is difficult when you are in such a situation. My lawyer told me I did indeed have a right to do what I did, (stay in a temporary place until an agreement could be made). I see her tomorrow.

Of course you have a right to stay in a temporary place. It isn't illegal to move out, and nobody here suggested that it is. What it is is UNWISE.

What do you think they are going to do to you? Are they going to physically attack you?

I am afraid of being drugged more than anything. Also, with a history of husband making up stuff about me that false and the accusations that are not true, two of them against one is not good. You sure are very hard on me. I'm really looking for support and help out here, not so critical. I'm in a very bad situation and looking for support and help. It is not safe for me to be there, and, that is why I left when he refused me any money to stay and can't get it into court yet.

To counteract any false charges, you would wear a VAR at all times. How would they drug you? I just wouldn't eat anything that either of them had access to. I would put a lock on my bedroom door, buy a small bar fridge and live life as peacefully as I could, until I could get the APs GONE.

You can't ask for any kind of support you think you want, but you will definitely get the kind of help and support that you so desperately need here. Don't bash the people who will help you, you will lose all help, and with it, all hope.

I am beginning think I am just too much of gentle soul to be out here. I need hope and encouragment, but, trying to find my way. I have never hurt so bad in my life, and, been treated so bad. I wouldn't have did what I did with a locksmith to my home, and, Police and escort armed with a camera if I had really left. I can't even get my mail. I can't go back there to live with the two of them. There comes a time where there is affordavility when we can't get into court. I am not made of money, while, I've been dumped right when I retired - under false pretences. He is more than triple my income since I don't have a full check yet. OMG....this was one site I was hoping for some heart and soul. Not so much forcing me back into a cruel situation that I have tried to escape.

What do you want from us, Beep? What do YOU want from your life? You want heart and soul from us? What do you mean by that?

Beep, we can blow sunshine up your butt or we can tell you what you need to do to save your marriage and protect yourself legally.

We could fill pages with "I'm so sorry you're going through this and your H is an a$$", but that isn't going to do anything to help you either save your marriage or help you legally.

How old is your DD?