Thank you for posting Holy -- its always nice to hear of the demise of an affair!

Best to you and your kids!

Another MB success !

YOU !!!!!!

OMG
As Charlie Sheen says "winning"

Bimbo is gone, flown the coop dumped D*ck.

Do you hear it the karma bus has crashed....boom

Holyheart gets a text from D*ck tonight..

U win. Bimbo and I officially done. Good job

Money gone - bimbo gone
Took 4 years but bimbo is back on FB probably meeting her next victim.

Told Holy heart I would post this.

D(ck is in bad place. The universe is no longer his world

Now for the whole Karma would like the same for mine and chia.

Good things come in 3....

Well.
Time'll tell if its kaput for good.
Karmabus........just move to the next stop.....

"U win. Bimbo and I officially done. Good job"

Amazing, isn't it, how this wayward still blames HH when all she wanted was to protect her children and herself from the financial disaster put upon her family from the affair.

HH you did everything right.

HH, please protect yourself as much as you can and brace yourself for the fall out to come. Seriously.

You are in my prayers tonight. May God send his angels to protect you, please be vigilant and very careful for yourself and your family at this time.

Good to hear from you Chai. Hope you are doing well, thank you for the update.

Love in Christ,
Miss M

Just wait until BIMBO finds another and is really in no contact, the fog starts to lift.

Cannot imagine how deep he will sink into He!!

Protect your children - his next step, if he holds true to form is suicide.

Why do you say suicide?

The man has worked for four years to escape the consequences of his behavior; four years of heaping those consequences any way he can at Holyheart. He's defied the law, put his job in jeopardy and overall done everything he could to put off a day of reckoning.

That escape is no longer possible. The financial disaster waiting for him is at his door with bankruptcy court which means a demotion or complete loss of job (works in finance - bank officers, anything requiring fiduciary capacity will be closed off to him).

This man has way too much pride to flip burgers or work in a call center.

His selfishness has been off the chart to date.

Suicide is the ultimate selfish act that a selfish person will employ to escape the consequences. Whether it's done to throw the last guilt log he can at Holyheart, or to the ex OW, he's not going to likely go the other way and do the hard work to clean up the debris his cheating has caused over four years' time.

I believe he's too far gone to consider recovery of his soul to be a priority. Suicide is the next break on that path.

I often wonder what it is like for a wayward to go to rock bottom. I can see how D!ck is on his way down. It is such a sad situation for HH. Now this becomes "Nothing!" All this was done for nothing. As a BW, that is so hard to comprehend. We loved these men with all our heart and soul, and they throw it all away for a porn star wannabe, who ends up dumping them in the end.

Bimbo will get what she has coming. I am so happy for the Karma bus. In the end she is bitter as gall.

I hope D!ck's to the bottom allows his soul to come to terms with what he has chosen to do. They are some of the worst waywards on the planet. He will likely be like Peachy's WxH and end up in jail. They continue to skirt the law, and that can only be done for so long.

I hope suicide isn't his option, but I can see how it would be for him. I cannot imagine what it must be like today to live in his shoes. How one can look in the mirror. How one can look at others. I wouldn't be shocked if his eyes have turned to grey along with his hair. His heart has likely aged decades, and his insides are slowly turning to stone.

{{HH}} God will be GREAT to you -- your rewards are coming and they will continue getting better over time.

Tough~

No further word from D!ck. He told a friend he was headed to the coast for the weekend. I never would have believed suicide an option for D!ck. Never in a million years. Same with the affair. And abandoning our kids. And disrespecting me and his family. And the money lies. And the bankruptcy.

His bankruptcy has been denied.

I am watching my back. I pray he stops blaming me and does the work to dig himself out of the mess he created. I can't predict what he will or will not do anymore because I do not know him. I did know something was up by his texts and calls. I ignored all. Not one syllable from me.

And Bimbo. Two songs run through my head. "ding dong the witch is dead" and "Shes's single again (Hold onto Your Man).". She is a textbook gold digger. She's probably a victim in her family and friends eyes. She stood by him for 4 years and he couldn't get D due to his wife. She needs to think about herself for a change (cough). She needs to tell her soulmate good bye. Of course, no mention of the things she's acquired, the torture she put me through, the debt he brought her out of. Her name is not on ONE credit card.

She walks away financially ahead.

I believe there is a special place in hell for people like her. She thinks there is nothing wrong with her behavior. Sick. Twisted. Wrong.

There are no winners here. No one won.

Remember MBer Believer?

She wrote the following metaphor on Jan 3, 2009.



Some time later, OW dumped Believer's XWH after he'd spent all his money on OW (including Believer's retirement savings) .... Believer's XWH killed himself.
It happens.
These wayward men who cement their identity to a flashy OW who likes to spend $$$ are the weakest of the weak. Once the flashy OW is done with him, he is an empty shell. The parasitic OW has taken everything. It's not love. It is a parasitic devouring of a once decent and respectable human being.

Warning:

When an XWH has been unceremoniously dumped by OW after he has sacrificed just about everything of value to her .... he will take unpredictability to a new level.

Believer posted the following April 15, 2010.

Your question has now been answered ... he is now in HE!! ... his vacation is his worst nightmare!

HH has officially answered her own initial question.

Wow. I didn't know I was that smart back then.

As I said before, I really doubt it's "officially done" with the first break up in 3 years. She needs his money, and unless she has another D!ck lined up, she will probably string him a long for a while. But who cares at this point.

And finally, my attorney has acted in getting D!ck's wages garnished. The paperwork was mailed to his employer yesterday so it should kick in soon.

So consequences might finally be happening. Wages garnished. Bankruptcy denied. Bimbo dumps him, at least temporarily. He has no relationship with any of our kids. He has health problems and is on anti-depressants. He's struggling at his job. I have moved on.

I don't have anything to add. I have detached. And it's not like he wants to get back with me. If anything, he is directing all of his anger towards me. I'm to blame for Bimbo getting fed up with the D delay.

I'll keep you posted. If anything, my story adds to the statistics that most A end near the 4 year mark (not 2 year) and the BS will eventually recover. But I would never wish this learning experience on anyone. And I will beat into my kids brains and their prospective spouses' brains if they do not intend to marry for life, do not get married in the first place. Divorce is too painful and expensive and life-draining. Yes, you will recover but at a hell of a price.

I'm borrowing this from Phoenix's thread as a reminder of what is going through D!ck's soul. I hope one day he realizes all he's lost.

Thinking about this quote in the context of a wayward mind ....

1. Deception.
We talk about wayward "fog", which is verbal expression of the self deception that goes on in a wayward mind. Deception which allows a so called "normal" person to commit adultery. "The enemy" is the ultimate liar. What deception does is this, deception makes swallowing a deadly poison seem like a desirable choice. This is the point in adultery where the waywards telling themselves lies might be shocked into reality by exposure. perhaps not, but it is possible. Truth & light are kryptonite to the deception. I am talking about the wayward losing his/her mind.

2. Hardening.
Now, about the wayward's heart. It hardens. The wayward heart becomes callous. The wayward heart becomes closed off and insensitive to the pain and devastation their adultery causes. The wayward can even accept the broken hearts of their own children if that pain supports their adultery. The wayward becomes impervious to empathy. Cry all you want, your tears have no meaning for the hardened heart of a lost wayward. Your tears, your pain only annoy the hardened wayward heart.


3. Destruction.
And finally, the wayward's soul. The sin of adultery destroys the wayward's soul. The spiritual essence of humanity is nowhere to be found in the wayward. Integrity has been cast off in order for the adultery to continue. The wayward does not go on his/her merry way unscathed. The wayward is the most wounded of all. The destruction of a once beautiful soul, now made ugly by sin, is heartbreaking.


There is a progression to this loss.
Humans are vulnerable to temptation.
Temptation feels good.
But, giving into the sin, and living in the sin is life changing.
Soul changing.

We can actually SEE it sometimes.
We can actually SEE the cold eyes of the hardened heart.
We can actually SEE the lifeless eyes of the soulless.

I know what you mean. I have threatened my children that marriage is for life and if they ever screw around on their spouses that I would kick their butts.

WH is with OW#2 now and she is a real weiner. She is use to having expensive things and doing world travel and left her husband for mine and he has NOTHING! As a matter of fact she had a large house and now lives in a trailer with my WH in Idaho. But what is so great is that it is a felony in Idaho to commit adultery and her husband is getting her for that and for embezzlement. She embezzled $30,000 from his company and he has proof. So when he gets through with her she'll have nothing. See how long she and my WH last.

Right now WH has cut off DD21's cell phone because she sold the storage unit with all his stuff in it and that included his clothes. He is MAD! What he doesn't know is that she and her boyfriend bought the stuff. They put the money in his account. She hates her father right now and that is such a shame. He has been ugly and threatening me for days because things haven't been going his way. As usual everyone else is to blame and we are all liars and he doesn't even know what we have said to each other. DD21 is getting a phone this week on her own and she said her dad did her a favor. WH is so stupid, I was paying the cell phone for ll of us and now I am going to quit paying for it and get my own line. The cell phone bill is in his name only.

WH has been threatening me with everything he can think of and I told him that he could do me no harm anymore. That he had either destroyed or taken everything he could already. He even threatened my retirement and I told it would be worth giving him half my retirement(what it is worth now). But that he would never enjoy it because by the time I would retire in 20+ years he would probably be dead because of his smoking like chimney, drinking like a fish, his diabetes, his high cholesterol, and his depression.

WH fantasy world is going to come crashing down again and I think worse this time because there is no me or his daughters to be there. I think his family has finally had it with him and since he is staying in an area that has a small population and everyone knows everyone it is going to get real ugly there. Can't wait until the fireworks start.

I read your thread yesterday from start to finish. I am speechless concering Bimbo. I was really intrigued by your thread because it gave me an insight to my WH's POSOW and my WH.

Understanding sin and how it consumes one's soul (as described above) still has me dumbfounded today. I have never see this kind of evil in front of my own eyes until it consumed my WH.

I pray incessantly to have GOD get the evil from his soul. To let the devil get out of his life. Today he is truly "Bad company corrupts good character". I feel defeated because my WH has himself surrounded by so many evil people.

Reading your story reminds me of the situation my WH has himself in today. It is so hard as his wife because I cannot pull him out or do anything except watch him destroy his life. There isn't one morally good person surrounding him today. I feel so defeated. My kids and I feel defeated.

I move on with my life today and look forward to a great future. I am fortunate to have a great job, so I can get them the things their dad cannot. He is financially taking himself down and thank goodness I was able to get a court order to separate myself.

Best of luck. I look forward to your updates.

Tough

Something I see with all waywards - they are all depressed when this comes crashing down.

Dr. Harley hasn't talked much about the depression. It seems to be very very bad for waywards. I am curious when the depression ends.

I hope Dr. Harley adds more in his books about the withdrawal/depression when the adultery is over.

Prayer makes a big difference, it has in my life. I pray for me and my children and even my WH. He wasn't a bad man but I don't recognize him anymore. I pray that God touches my WH.

If you go over things in your mind about your WS you might notice that he/she was probably already depressed to begin with. I realize a few months ago that my WH suffered from clinical depression and wasn't getting treated for it and I wish I had picked up on it. Too late now but he still made the decision to cheat and is still cheating today.