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I got married 2 months ago. Some weeks ago my husband left his cell at home and I had the idea of taking the memory card to download photos of wedding ...to my surprise, I discovered photos of him and another woman in the beach...and even worse, photos of that woman(naked) and of the hotel they stayed ( That weekend he had told me he had to get out of the city because of his job). Of course I was completely shocked! And today he left his cell again ...I checked his messages and found out that he texts and calls another 5 women, basically he says the same to them: that he misses them, that he wanted them to be with them or even that he wanted to have sex with them in that moment....In one of those texts he talks about plans to go out again with the woman who shows up in the photos. It's incredible that he says he loves me and talks about plans for the future and at the same time is doing something like this. Lately he rejects me every time I want to approach him, he doesn't allow me to touch him, kiss him or hug him and alleges he's tired...Excuses, because our sex life had been very active so far and I have never rejected him...to the contrary, I love him and sex is for me the way I show him physically how much I care about him and love him. He divorced 3 years ago and was dating with "friends" and had told me his "playboy" life had finished when we married....Now I see he still wants to feel he's a Casanova... Should I confront him ( in a civilized way) and tell him that I already know about his behaviour? about all those women?
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Joined: Mar 2009
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This is my honest answer. You've been married two months.
Get out as fast as you can. He is a louse.
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Cut and run from that hound-dog, katelin.
I think it's very kind of you to want to confront him in a civilized way. If I were you, I, personally, would lean more toward actions speaking louder than words:
He would find his belongings sitting in the driveway. His hammer-crushed cell phone would be sitting on top of them. Locks would be changed on all doors.
That should drive the point home.
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Kate
Lately he rejects me every time I want to approach him, he doesn't allow me to touch him, kiss him
Thank God! Why would you want to catch an STD from the multiple women he is playing?
He divorced 3 years ago and was dating with "friends" and had told me his "playboy" life had finished when we married....Now I see he still wants to feel he's a Casanova...
And when he gets too old to pick up women for free, he will patronize houses of prostitution while you are at work making money, just like my brother in law.
He sounds very smooth, I think you will find he is lying about other aspects of his life as well, financial, military accomplishments, , how large a deer he shot, whatever.
Collect all the intelligence you can expose these OW to their spouses and then can this guy like tuna exposing him to everyone last. God Bless Gamma
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Should I confront him ( in a civilized way) and tell him that I already know about his behaviour? about all those women? i would not only confront him, but I would forward all those nekkid pictures and texts, emails to all those women. And tell them you are his wife. And be sure and forward it to his mother and dad. Then I would contact an attorney about getting an annulment. He is not marriage material. Please get STD testing ASAP and do not sleep with him!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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ITA with ML.
Was he married when you two began dating?
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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i would not only confront him, but I would forward all those nekkid pictures and texts, emails to all those women. And tell them you are his wife. And be sure and forward it to his mother and dad. ![[Linked Image from pic4ever.com]](http://www.pic4ever.com/images/devil.gif) Now, that's action! Beauty. Do you know any of the women? Can you find out who they are? If any of them are married, their husbands might like a copy of everything, as well.
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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No, he wasn't. I met him one year after he divorced. He's 47 and I'm 38. I don't know any of these women...Well, I saved 6 photos (I had to put myself together) both in my laptop and my e-mail account. Ah! he used my cell to text and the foolish man forgot to delete the outbox.
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No, he wasn't. I met him one year after he divorced. He's 47 and I'm 38. I don't know any of these women...Well, I saved 6 photos (I had to put myself together) both in my laptop and my e-mail account. Ah! he used my cell to text and the foolish man forgot to delete the outbox. I would send them ALL the evidence. You have their email addresses, right? And be sure and send a copy to his mother and dad.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Kate,
He's 47
Good Lord, from your description I though he was in his 20's or early 30's, how old are the women he is freaking with?
Do you really expect a guy that old to reform? If he dosen't understand the pain he is inflicting on his spouse at this stage in life.
You might want to speak with his Ex Wife, the things your WH said about her are likely untrue.
If you have kids of your own that is even more reason for getting away from this guy, especially if they are daughters.
God Bless Gamma
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No, he wasn't. I met him one year after he divorced. He's 47 and I'm 38. I don't know any of these women...Well, I saved 6 photos (I had to put myself together) both in my laptop and my e-mail account. Ah! he used my cell to text and the foolish man forgot to delete the outbox. Good girl, for keeping your wits about you like you did! Consider yourself lucky to have discovered this when you did. There are no children. You are free to go and not look behind you. Definitely send copies to his parents and explain to them that you, sadly, will have to end this marriage as a matter of protecting yourself from further harm from their son.
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Fortunately, I have no kids and neither does he, Gamma. I also thought that a man of his age would like living a estable life at this time of his life and wouldn't behave like a teen whose hormones are out of control. As I could see, he likes thirtysomething- fortysomething women.
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Fortunately, I have no kids and neither does he, Gamma. I also thought that a man of his age would like living a estable life at this time of his life and wouldn't behave like a teen whose hormones are out of control. As I could see, he likes thirtysomething- fortysomething women. Sadly, there is no age limit for people with bad boundaries behaving badly. 
D-Day 2-10-2009 Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever! Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Kate,
You should likely do a background check on your H, seriously my neighbor married a guy who never told her about a previous marriage. Your H could have kids he never told you about.
God Bless Gamma
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Kate,
You should likely do a background check on your H, seriously my neighbor married a guy who never told her about a previous marriage. Your H could have kids he never told you about.
God Bless Gamma I don't think I would even bother with this. 2 MONTHS into a marriage and there are at LEAST SIX OWs. CUT HIM LOOSE.
BW(Me)aka Scotty:37 DSx2: 10,12 DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09 Plan B Dec18/09 Personal R in works Scotty's THING Newly Betrayed click herePraying for walls and doors. Thanx MM “Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.” ? Maya Angelou PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION THANK YOU
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Well, last update: I checked his texts and he told to one of these women( the most recent, I guess): "I live in xxx, no kids, and I hope you're single too"....jaaaaa Single TOOO?
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Now you know why he got divorced. I would advise an annulment.
The one constant through all the years has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It's been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game, is a part of our past. It reminds us of all that once was good, and it could be again.
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Kate,
RUN, RUN, RUN. I'm so sorry for you, but I can't even imagine what there is to even repair here. Except you.
I too assumed this was a 20-something. Good Lord.
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Oh guys, my hubby just texted me he must get out of the city on Fri. and back on Sat. because of his job (I already know it's not truth, he's planning to spend those days with the same woman of the last time). I texted back that we would talk about it later. The bomb is going to explode today...What a Thanksgiving gift!
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Katelin,
The bomb is going to explode today...What a Thanksgiving gift!
Thankfully it is not a Christmas gift.
It's not your fault this guy is a LIAR who creates a very convincing image of himself that has no real substance. Guys like him are very smooth and I suspect, deep down, actually hate women.
Again it's not your fault for trusting someone, that's not a crime, what he is doing is or should be.
Of course you could have some fun with this and play along and collect all the intelligence you can and then bust it open really BIG.
God Bless Gamma
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