Okey-doke, I'll take the bait.

Charmedless, if you really want to end this horrid thing you've begun, there are a few things you need to do. Get a pen and paper. I'll wait.

1. Call his wife TODAY and tell her what the two of you did.
2. Beg her not to kill you.
3. Write a letter to her hound-dog husband, telling him that the two of you abused his wife terribly and that you never wish to see or hear from him again.
4. Change all means of contact so he can't reach you. Change your cell phone, shut down your Facebook, dump your email addresses and get new ones - what else have you got? Think hard - how can he contact you? Eliminate those possibilities.
5. Stop all contact with anyone who hangs with him, and that includes your cousin.
6. Don't go to any places he's known to go to.

When you can tell me you've done these things I'll know you're serious.

You mean .. he didnt say it becasue he was married? And loves his wife? and doesnt want to be an adulterer? SOunds more like he didnt sleep with you because he thinks your to close to people who are in his family and know him and would be afraid for his wife to find out. Very poor boundries if you ask me ... Now ask yourself. Why would you want a man that would cheat on his wife? If he did it to her ... he will most DEF do it to you once the "high" wears off of the addiction to his attraction to you and vise versa.

Thats like building a house on top of quick sand.

Are you going to tell this man's poor BW?

sounds like you're trying to weasel your way out of looking like the bad guy. too late. YOU lip-locked with a married man and there is probably more to this story b/c how would that have been possible if you went out as a "group"? and now, all of a sudden you're not texting anymore, BUT you spoke with him today?? another thing, if he was willing to push up on you while he and his wife are having a good relationship, why were either of you contemplating the risk of an affair?

The only way you're going to be able to get through the emotions and deal with it is to:

1. Tell the wife
2. Cut off all contact whatsoever with this man. Never see or talk to him again. You can not be friends.
3. Never allow yourself to be "just friends" with a married man again.

We went out a few times not just once. I don't know his face at all or anyone I just know him as a person and that he says he is married. Like I have mentioned I do not even know where he stays exactly only the name of the condominium. We last texted earlier today and since then we haven texted. After the decision.

Honestly, I only know him well as a friend not as the other half.

Thank you guys. If I wanted to weasly my way out why would I be so transparent in here. I'm being sincere and not saying I'm right. I said earlier there is no reason at all and it's wrong. Wrong means wrong! The best I can do is just tell him no more contact. Not possible I get to his wife? How? I don't know her don't know her name don't know anything about her.

What's that got to do with anything? You're trying to minimize this. Don't forget your first post:

Tell your mother you've been dating a married man.
Tell her he is your cousin's friend.
Ask your mother to be your accountability partner.
When you are tempted to answer MM's texts or calls, have your mother call married man (MM) and give him a piece of her mind.

If my adult daughter made this request of me .... there is no way in hell MM would dare risk contacting my DD ever again.
I have no qualms about raining misery on such a low character who was pestering my DD.

You know his name. Get his address. Write his wife a letter at that address. Tell her how you became involved and give her your phone number so she can call and ask you questions if she needs to. DO NOT TELL your emotional affair partner you are doing this.

You may not think we are supporting you, but we are. We are supporting you to do the right thing.

You made a mistake. Make it right. You will feel much better.

Your cousin knows her, at the very least how to get in touch with her.

You have to tell his wife. Not only is this necessary for her and their marriage, but it will also serve a necessary step for you in removing evil people from your life.

ANYONE who would get mad at you for being truthful and remorseful about your sin is only around you for the continuance of sin. That might be a bit much for you, so let me try again:

You will continue to be someone's sloppy side dish unless you surround yourself with better people who won't let you stoop that low.

A letter may be intercepted. Call or go in person. Find him on facebook, find his wife, message her. Do not trust the mail, it's run by the gubbermint. lol.

Person to person is best. Call your cousin and ask for her name and number.

You can try facebook ... search for your WH friend and then lok in his list of friends to see if he is married. Usually people who are married add their wife/hubby as a friend. SHould not be too difficult.

THen tell her .. this would be the honourable thing to do. No ifs and or buts about it ... You will not really get any other answers here other than this mantra repeating itself.

Quoted for truth!

It is not my intent to make anyone feel bad, but when you "exchange" numbers with a person whom you KNOW is married, YOUR intentions are not good. The Married person does not have good intentions. He intends to betray his wife and you intend to assist him in the betrayal. Have you told your boyfriend about this? Would he dump you if you confessed? Put yourself in the wife's shoes....she is probably at home taking care of his needs, the kids, etc and he is so selfish that he would hurt her like that by fooling around. He made a commitment to her to be faithful to her through good and bad. Her finding out about it is beyond the point. Even if she never finds out, he has still hurt her and the damage has been done. If it's not you, it will be someone else he sleeps with. He is "looking" for whatever reason and trust me it is a reflection of WHO HE IS, not who the wife is. It is a reflection of WHO YOU ARE. You wouldn't wear a name tag that says "I'm a W- - - - whos sleeps with married men" so why should your actions match those of someone you say you are not?

MB, MR. Nice: I suggested the letter because I'm assuming charmed will never have the guts to call the wife or see her. Yes, it would be best if she did that, but she seems to be mired in her own emotions, not thinking about her affair partner's poor wife whose life she helped devastate.

Go see her, charmed. Do the right thing. She has every right to know her husband is a louse.

If you "fell for" a married man that means you have inappropriate boundaries around men. You allowed a married man to meet your emotional needs and that is why you "fell for him." If you had appropriate boundaries around men he wouldn't have been able to get close enough for you to "fall for him." You are oddly "flattered" by this attention and don't comprehend that his attention is an insult, not a compliment.

The way you get over your feelings is to stay away from the man. Stop talking to him, stop doing anything with him. Leave the married man alone.