My solictor emailed me this morning with a 2x4 about not getting back to her on some things she needed in order to file.

So luckily cause I have the Blackberry I could get on that straight away. She is going away for a few weeks and my foot dragging is holding things up.

I want to be divorced but I hate the paperwork - and everything about getting divorce. I want it to be over but oddly I like that its a complex process. Because marriage means something and you cant just blink your way out.

I just hate being left with the mess to clean up.

But the nasty task is done now and I feel better.

I also have to talk to the job interview people to get feedback next week. Apparently my being late made not a jot of difference because I called and they just moved people around. Its a scoring system apparently and they're going to give me a breakdown of how I scored.

At least being late has made me overhaul how I do things and get myself organised. So that's something.

But Ive already heard that the woman who got the job is older and much more experienced.

This recessions stinks, too much competition for every job.

Well I have another application to fill in any way.

Good luck indie!

The breakdown of the scoring will help with any future interviews, so well done on following up with this.

Us Plan B'ers keep learning and growing

Yes we do, sister-b

WE DO learn, and grow, and not only do we SURVIVE, we THRIVE.

I was feeling a bit left out.

And I LOVE my Blackberry.

BTW, Car, you have mail.

Ah I love ya too Scott,

Okay this is a q for the boys if there's any around?

Would you ever have facebook chatted a woman at 11pm - just because or does it always mean something?

Had my facebook page up last night and my usual 'show offline' status was off. Dude I work with popped up saying 'Yo yo yo Indie are you chilling after a long Sunday shift?'

Well I clicked offline so no chatting but I think I need to switch on my wary radar.

He's a BH who I recommended this site to. I wouldn't chat to him about his marriage tho. He tried a few times and gave up.

He didn't say anything off in the FB chat, but we aren't friendly at work at all. I think its odd to contact an acquaintance at best at that hour. Am I right?

CREEPY

Yep. He's definitely in fisherman mode.
Again, yep

I don't chat on facebook. Message� yes. Post� yes. But I don�t usually chat on facebook.

You said he's a betrayed husband right? It could be that he's just missing his wife and lonely. He might just want to talk to someone who understands his situation, get advice and sympathy from. But that's what the MB forum is for.

Could it come across as creepy? Yes.. Fishing� yes�

Because he's a coworker and you know him personally it seems like a dangerous temptation that I would avoid. Especially if he�s lonely or both of you are lonely.

Indie, you know what to do right? I would UNFRIEND him. You're still married, and so is he. He's obviously letting down any boundaries he had(if he had any to begin with). Don't let your boundaries down. It's not worth it.

I wouldn't unfriend him.
I just would not chat with him via FB.

I don't think its creepy.

I DO think he is feeling the rollercoaster of emotions betrayed people feel and is vulnerable to
fishing

Just don't take the bait.

You can be kind but distant....yk?

Thanks Reading. I actually agree with your assessment in the main....

But I have always kind of thought he was creepy!

I couldnt tell you why. It isnt anything specific. As soon as I saw the 'creepy' comments roll in that made me laugh.

Its not worth leaving a boundary open just to keep someone I dont like as a FB friend, so out he goes.

Its had me all weirded out though.

I would NEVER call or text someone at 11. I might facebook chat someone - if we were VERY close. Like my sis or best mate. Girls as a rule.

I am actually now starting to wonder if he is a BH or if thats just the story of his divorce for work people.

Ill never know tho because there'll be a ten foot pole between me and him!

Why would you be kind to someone who has obviously weak boundaries? HE is married, Indie is married. He was trolling.

Why wouldn't you unfriend him from FB? It's just FB. I didn't tell her to run around telling people what he has done, or to shun him. I suggested that she end an avenue for him to contact her, so as not to have this happen again. I don't see the flaw in it.

I personally have very few male "friends" on FB. I had more before I came to MB and learned about boundaries. After I learned more about them, I decided that it would be safer to remove people who COULD be a temptation to me in any way. I removed old crushes, ex-bfs, etc, and I don't regret one delete I made. It protects ME, and THAT is what is important.

Do you know what that "creepy" feeling was with him? He always has had weak boundaries, you just didn't know what to call it before.

I have a co-worker who is like that too. He tried to friend me on FB last year. I declined.

In my opinion, you showing your availability on FB shows that it is ok to open up a dialogue with you or anyone that is online. I believe he is just trying to find someone to connect with about his situation.

You did the right thing by not engaging in converstion with him. You're in a vulnerable state and so is he. The good thing is that you knew better to engage. I don't think you need to unfriend him, but if he gives you a wrong feeling or impression, maybe you should.

For me, I long for human connection (which I get here alot), and I hate being alone. I have boundaries as well, but I find myself having to stop reaching for my friends because they have their own lives. In short, you did everything right IMO.

Of course you crave human connection right now, but this is one MAJOR reason that the IMing feature has been disabled on this site. THis way, affairs can not begin between posters. THAT would be BAD BAD BAD.

I have exchanged email addresses with members of this board, but only FEMALE posters. THis is to protect myself, as well as them.

I agree. That is bad. And the one word that separates me from my WW is BOUNDARIES....I have them as do other BS here.

AND ENFORCING THEM.

I sense a little bit of anger towards the nasty man trolling one of your plan b chicklets??

Dont worry hon, hes history.

Feel better?